A Glimpse Inside Matt's Mind

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Author's Note: This chapter is in Matt's point of view, just to give you a taste of what's running around his mind. I'm not entirely sure how guys think or converse with another, but this is how I talk with my best friend (ie very perverted and mean teehee). Enjoy!

Warning: Foul language :)

Furiously yet skillfully I crushed the buttons on my x-box remote controller destroying the enemies on the screen. Greg had just died and I was trying to revive him back to life before it was too late. The remote vibrated signalling I had been wounded, the zombies swarmed me from all angles as I desperately tried to hit them all, the vibrations increasing till the screen turned red. Game over flashed before our eyes and I threw the controller on the ground lightly as to not break it.

“You lasted longer than last time,” I remarked to Greg who shrugged his shoulders in response. His preference was more old school, he kicked ass at the GameCube. Sprawled out on the floor in my room I grabbed the bag of discarded chips and started munching, the crunch of each fried sliced potato taking away the bitter taste of defeat.

“So what’s going on between you and Sara,” Greg questioned. I knew it was only a matter of time before he brought this up and quite frankly I thought Honey would have made him ask weeks ago. Ready to deny everything I opened my mouth, shrugging my shoulders, but Greg sensing this interrupted, “and don’t give me any bullshit, we all know there’s something”. He was right but there was no easy way to put it.

“You have to swear you won’t tell anyone, not even Honey,” I insisted. I didn’t want this getting back to the girls, the second they knew anything they would start teasing me about how they knew it all along, and that we would make the cutest couple. It was a little too mushy for my taste, and in their well meaning attempts to get us together, they would probably only tear us further apart. And if they found out about Sara and my arrangement, I’m sure they would ultimately try to kick my ass for being such a douchebag. But it’s not like I didn’t want the relationship, I wasn’t trying to set feminists back by using women only for sex, they couldn’t blame me! But logic holds no meaning with angry women who feel wronged. There would be a castration in my future. Just the thought alone made me wince.

“Dude, no problem,” he lazily tried to convince me. Rolling my eyes, I wasn’t sure how long he’d be able to last under the scrutiny of Honey’s intense interrogation, but hopefully he’d respect the basic bro code and not say anything.

“I like her,” I reluctantly admitted for lack of better words. What we had was different, and this wasn’t me trying to be romantic but our friendship was strange. Quite frankly I’d rather be playing video games with her right now instead of Greg, I’m sure Sara could kick his ass at x-box.

“So make your move,” he offered for advice, as if it was that simple. If it was doesn’t he think I would have done something by now? Raising an eyebrow at his blasé comment, I rolled my eyes once again. He didn’t know what the hell was going on between us, half the time I don’t know either. It was a confusing mess of mixed singles. When we were together it was either silence or jokes or sex. We never talked about anything real, anything that had to do with either of us. It was as if neither of us wanted to invade the other’s privacy. She never once asked where my father was. Never made any comments about never seeing him, and I never asked about her parents. During Christmas break we had our first real conversation, and that was just me admitting to a fact that was already known by most people. It was like I was reading to her from a report that summarized the accident not telling her all the gruesome details. All the tears that were shed that day and since then by my family.

“The thing is we already started a friends’ with benefit kind of thing,” I tried to explain causing Greg to sit up straighter in the chair he was casually leaning in. It made me sound like the ultimate player, but it honestly wasn’t a situation I ever thought I would find myself in. It was insane and some nights I go to sleep hoping that it isn’t some weird dream.

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