Psychotic (BVS Lex Luthor x Reader)

chapter nineteen

Your feet dragged across the floor of the Scout Ship. Lex kept mumbling nonsense to himself as he kept a tight hand on your arm.

"Lex," you cried. "Please just let me go..."

"Not until this is finished," he said.

You sucked in a deep breath. "Please, I don't want to be a part of this!"

Lex turned to you and glared. "Enough!" he shouted angrily, his jaw tight and his face burning red in the dim light. You started to sob and shake in terror. Lex's eyes softened and he loosened his grip on you. He pulled you to his chest and squeezed you tightly. "I'm sorry... I'm sorry. I didn't want to scare you. I'm going to fix this."

You sobbed harder. You just wanted to go home. Everything was different now. Even if Lex didn't just keep you hostage and let you go home, it wouldn't be the same. You stayed still and quieted your cries. Once you did, Lex pulled away and kept walking.

When Clark returned, you were relieved to see that he didn't have the head of Batman in his possession. Lex was disappointed, he said. You knew that it wasn't over. And when Lex started up something from inside and you watched that disgusting monster squirm and write from beneath your feet.

You clutched onto Lex like he was the only thing that could keep you safe. Maybe he was. He held back onto you like he was afraid to lose you.

You wished desperately that you were back in his office, a glass of champagne in your hand and a long dress on. Lex was happy and at peace, and he wasn't secretly planning anything like this behind his back. He would kiss your forehead, hold your hand, grip your waist... make you feel loved and wanted and safe.

Instead, you were standing here with Clark and Lex with a monster growling from below.

"Ancient Kryptonian deformity!" Lex announced to Clark. You gripped onto his arm in fear at the sight before you. "Blood of my blood." You gasped as the thing ripped out of its cocoon. Its long, quivering fingers ripped through and he began to rise. "Born to destroy you." Lex smiled and held his arm out. "Your Doomsday." As soon as Lex finished speaking, Doomsday stood up. He broke completely free of his shelter and roared furiously. His disgustingly misfigured skin dripped and oozed.

You looked up at Lex and searched for any sign of a panic. Of regret, of fear, of something. He only grinned. "Now god is good as dead," he said proudly. You held on tighter to him, despite the longing you felt to just run away. If you moved, you feared that the thing would turn on you and kill you. Doomsday roared again, this time so loud that your eardrums throbbed. You cowered behind Lex's shoulder as the thing started to walk forward.

"Lex," you breathed. "Lex, we have to go!"

"We can't!" he said. "We can't."

Doomsday's beady eyes gleamed as they took in the scene before him. You could've sworn, for half a second, his eyes fixated on you. Lex pulled his arm forward and pushed you back a bit. You still clinged to his shoulder in fear. Doomsday growled, and his fist tightened. Before you could blink, his hand was flying towards you and you were on the ground.

You screamed as your forehead pressed against the floor. You could barely feel the body hovering over your own; you turned your head and watched as Superman started to fight the monster. "Lex, stop this!" Superman shouted.

"Listen to him!" you begged. Lex stood up and shook his head. "Lex, please!"

"I saved you, didn't I? I saved her."

"God is thirty years too late," Lex whispered. "And her... this was guaranteed the first time you let her down. There are no second chances, Mr. Kent. Not when it comes to her." He smiled, and the smile was almost sad.

"Lex, I don't want this!" you screamed desperately. "When I said that I hated Superman, I never wanted you to kill him. I never wanted you to get revenge. I was angry and scared, Lex, but you helped me. I stopped being hateful and angry because of you. Stop this, and it can go back to normal. We can! You and me, Lex, and you can let go of your fear, too. What your father did to you... it was horrible. No one deserved to go through that, but it happened, and I'm sorry. You fixed me. Let me fix you." The tears spilled over once again as Lex looked down at you from where he stood. "Please."

His hands tightened into fists as he whispered through clenched teeth, "I can't."

Superman flew off without another word, and you were left behind. You stared up at Lex with wide eyes.

"Do you hate me?" he muttered.

You clenched your jaw and your expression hardened. "I don't know."

He nodded and looked away. He rubbed his face and nervously swung his arm at his side. "Hm! But hate is a reasonable feeling, isn't it? Ha. One day you will see, ___. You will see exactly what you mean to me." You and Lex both watched as the flames and overtook the city of Metropolis. Doomsday's screeches and roars were painfully loud even from here. "There's no way he'll survive this. It's guaranteed to end him. I made sure of that." He put his hands on his hips and nodded. "I made sure of that, didn't I?"

You slowly got to your feet and started to back away. He kept his eyes on the scene before him; the destruction of the city. Your bottom lip quivered as you thought of the number of people who were being killed. And all the while, Lex was able to watch it with a smile. Who was he? You turned to run away, only to be stopped by a million flashing lights.

The SWAT team ran towards you. A few guns were pointed at you; you raised your hands above your head. "I'm not..." They nodded and searched you for the weapons that you didn't have. When they were finished, one of them grabbed you the inside of your elbow.

You looked back. Lex was on his knees, his hands behind his head. Your heart panged, despite knowing how sick of a person he truly was. His icy blue eyes stayed glued on yours. You watched them lock the handcuffs around his wrists harshly. He didn't wince, but you could tell that he was in pain.

One of the officers touched an earpiece that was in their ear. "Yeah, we have Mr. Luthor and one other hostage. Both are weapon free. We're taking him in now, and we'll take the girl to the medics and make sure she's free of any injuries." A burly officer reached down and grabbed Lex by his arms. He yanked him up to his feet and shoved him forward. As he walked by, you kept looking at him. You couldn't tell what you were feeling. Pain. Anger. Sadness. Fear. Love. Hate. Pure fury. Then, nothing. You went numb as he was dragged away.

He was gone, and you knew that you should've been sad. Or relieved. Something, anything.

But you weren't. You weren't any of those things because you knew that Lex had been gone a long, long time.