The Hilarious Romance Between The Brute and The Flea

So You're Telling Me You Love Him?!

The dark doorway loomed in front of a nervous guest. Her hand was stopped mid-knock as she debated on just leaving. This was none of her business after all...right? Should she really be getting involved? Passerby's began to stare at the odd clad in black figure frozen in front of a small apartment with a yellow-eared helmet resting on her head.

The nosy humans were pulled out of their trance-like state as the unknown shadow shook her helmet in a flustered state, making the onlookers relax and lose their tenseness. Time started to move again as she finally tapped a gloved hand lightly on the wooden door, leaving her watchers to scramble off for their own daily duties.

After what seemed like ages to the uneasy woman, the door finally opened and a man wearing a bartender suit shot her a sheepish smile.

"...Hey Celty." The blond debt collector mumbled, fully opening his door so that his guest that invited herself over could enter.

Celty dipped her helmet politely and walked inside, allowing Shizuo to lead her into the living room. Two glasses of lemonade were set out on coasters, and obvious attempt at being nice on the blond's part.

[Thanks!] Celty typed enthusiastically, knowing the bodyguard most likely forgot about Celty being unable to drink once again. It wasn't like the dullahan minded, however. In fact, she loved how Shizuo only saw her as another human and never cared or even brought up her missing head. It wasn't as obvious as Shinra's disinterest with what made Celty different from other humans but it still put her at ease. Neither man cared about how she didn't have a head, both enjoying her company simply because of her personality. Shizuo had actually said repeatedly that Celty was much more human than him (which she still denies to this very day).

"I thought you were supposed to be on a date with Shinra today so I was pretty surprised when you asked to come over." The blond commented as he made himself comfortable on his old and small couch. He took a sip out of his most likely extremely over-sweetened drink while tipping his head in question as he waited for the dullahan to reply.

Celty couldn't help but inwardly groan at that, the doctor's pained smile rushing back into her memories. She knew she'd have to make it up to her lover for ditching him on their date but as for now the situation with Shizuo was much more important. Going on a picnic with Shinra and listening to the man ramble would unfortunately have to wait.

[I read something interesting over on the Dollars website] Celty typed out hesitantly, effectively changing the conversation's course to what she had come over to talk about in the first place. She couldn't help but notice how Shizuo's posture immediately stiffened, soft mocha eyes hardening slightly behind blue tinted sunglasses.

"I hate that site, it's full of bullshit and fake people." Shizuo muttered, grabbing a cigarette out of his packet and immediately lighting it before taking a long inhale.

Celty waved her hands immediately, trying to calm down her obviously perturbed friend. She knew him throwing a huge rage would most surely not answer her question and the cleanup would be long as usual. [Don't worry, no one is trying to start anything. At least, I don't think] The dullahan tried to reassure the ex-bartender.

"Just tell me what happened, Celty." Shizuo sighed, leaning back on his couch as he watched her with unblinking eyes that screamed danger.

[Well....there were a lot of pictures of you and Izaya kissing at Russia Sushi] Celty typed out hesitantly, having an internal conflict on whether or not she should show him what she had written. In the end she showed it to the debt collector and waited for him to either A.) destroy the entire city that was Ikebukuro or B.) Leave for Shinjuku to fight a certain informant.

The response Celty got, however, was something not even her wildest dreams could come up with. Shizuo immediately relaxed and smiled at the dullahan, putting out his cigarette. The bodyguard took off his sunglasses and rubbed his eyes before glancing over at Celty with a happy little grin that made her heart sink.

[Wait...it's true?! Shizuo, you seriously kissed Izaya?! Did he blackmail you? Did he threaten Kasuka? Are you possessed?] Celty shoved her phone in his face, blasting him with questions as she panicked, debating on when she should text Shinra to say the world was ending and that Shizuo had been replaced by some alien.

"Calm down, I'm okay." Shizuo sighed. He started to tell the dullahan about how Izaya had come up to him a couple days earlier and had confessed his love for him. The bartender made sure to include Izaya's exact words so that Celty would know that Izaya wasn't lying. Shizuo followed up with their 'date' at Russia Sushi and how he'd wanted to test if being together with the informant was truly plausible. It was only then did the bartender realize that Izaya was actually a complete and total tsundere, running out of the store. After that Shizuo had simply gone home.

Celty stared at the blond, running over what he had told her. It all seemed extremely out of character for Izaya who had always said how much he hated the "monster".

However...what Shizuo told her exactly what Izaya said made her positive that Izaya loved him!

[I can't believe Izaya is actually in love with you!] Celty practically squealed, buzzing with excitement. She watched as Shizuo blushed at her words and scratched his head in embarrassment.

"Me neither but I guess he wants it to be a secret. He doesn't seem to have told anyone else so I probably shouldn't have kissed him. Still, I need to see him again." Shizuo couldn't help but smile at the cute tantrum his enemy had thrown at the restaurant.

[Wait, so you like him back?]

"Well, I'm willing to give it a try. He's the only one who has never been afraid of me so I think this could work out. Don't you?" Shizuo asked the dullahan somewhat hopefully.

[I think it's worth a try. I wish you luck, Shizuo!] Celty typed encouragingly.

Late that night Celty waved goodbye as she drove back home. She would've smiled to herself if she could as she recalled the plan Shizuo and her had come up with to help him obtain the stubborn tsundere.

Elsewhere, a certain God sneezed.