Macaronic

Chapter Twenty-One

     I decided to label it "Tough Love", and not the kind your mother had towards you. Tough love as in, it's tough to love. It's a tough relationship and the drama is a tough thing to handle. How many more times can I say tough?

     This was the final test. The final test to see how much we were feeling to fight through this. Things definitely weren't going to be as amazing or easy as before... were we ready to accept that?

     Ross was making this hard. He ran away from everything, how was I supposed to try and fix this if he sheltered himself away from me. I can't force him to face me. Did I need to give up too? Did I need to push it away and start over with someone else?

     I sat for what seemed like hours, my mind lost in thought. I was pulled away when my phone buzzed in my pocket.

"Ross!" I exclaimed aloud.

     I quickly answered the call with an eager hello, waiting for Ross to say something. It was silent for a moment.

"Please get over here," He mumbled, hanging up immediately after.

     I leapt from the couch and rushed out the door. I sped all the way to Ross' apartment, my heart skipping a beat with every sharp turn.

     When I arrived, I calmed myself down before entering.

"Ross," I called out.

"Here," He yelled back.

      I followed his voice to his bedroom. I expected to see him broken down in tears, but he just gave me an angry look when I appeared.

"Have a seat," He said, gesturing to the space on the bed next to him.

     I awkwardly took a seat beside him and let out a shaky breath.

"We need to talk about this. Because I'm kind of tired of all this back and forth with you," He said, which took me by surprise.

"Go for it," I said.

"This has all got to stop. I was talking to Red an-"

"Yeah, why in the world did you go to Red. He doesn't need all of our drama, especially not now," I interrupted.

"There was no one else to go to," He said defensively.

"There was me! Maybe a way to fix this would be for you to stop running to everyone but me when there's a problem,"

"Well maybe I've lost all trust in you and don't want to trust you with my feelings anymore," He snapped.

"If you didn't always jump to conclusions you wouldn't have that problem," I snapped back, standing up from the bed.

     He shook his head to dismiss my words, which he probably realized were true.

"Anyway.. I was talking to Red. He explained to me the importance of this, the importance of us and why we need to fix this," He told me.

     I stared at him for a moment, tugging at my t shirt collar. As much as I wanted to be mad, I really wanted this to be a thing of the past.

"Ross I don't know if I can live with the feeling that you don't trust me," I said softly. "For you to even think I would ever cheat on you killed me,"

"I didn't know what else to think. I honestly expected Shelby to steal you from me anyway. She's just one of those people, it's happened before," He revealed.

     I sighed once more, kneeling in front of him.

"There'd have to be something really wrong for someone to ever leave you. They'd have to be the stupidest person in the world to ever do that. I'm stupid, but I'm not that stupid," I said, taking his hands into mine.

"You're just saying that," He insisted.

"I'm not. I don't just speak to hear my own voice. I say these things because I feel like for the first time in my life, I can. I feel like for the first time, someone actually cares enough to listen. And that someone is you,"

     I looked to the wall, chuckling softly in attempt to keep the tears from falling.

"I don't love very often. But when I do, I don't do so lightly. I've invested so much into you because I care so much. I just need you to care just as much," I said, adverting my eyes back to his.

"Max, I promise you I care way more than you think,"

     There's that tingle to my heart at the sound of my name. It was nothing compared to before or compare to Shelby. Screw Shelby. I wasn't going to let my head trick me into thinking she's better for me. Like I said, I'm not that stupid.

     Sure, I called it tough love. But this tough love I was holding onto forever. It was worth it, no matter how many times my heart was tugged on. It was worth everything.

**A/N: I'm sorry I'm screwing with your emotions 😂 thanks again for all your support! be sure to follow my instagram for sneak peaks and such! @kawaiivacktor**