The Ramblings Of A Pakistani Insouciant.

#14- My mother.

Hi guys,

Today I am here to tell you how to win the parenting game, because can I just say; my mother has already won it.

I'm a pretty average girl. I stay at home more than I go out, I read, watch movies, eat junk thats not good for me, have painful periods and am in an unhealthy relationship with chocolate.

So, what makes the parenting my amma did better than what most parents do nowadays ( that I have seen ) ?

Well I'm not sure;
But I will tell you the one thing that made me realize how big of a rockstar my mother is, especially for not putting up with any sexist opinions that my brothers may have.

Now, as I understand it, in the west, kids are given equal chores no matter whether they are boys or girls, they have to do the work and so they do. However, and I speak from experience, as my friends and other family members have told me, this is not common at all here in the east.

Girls are told to and made to do all the work related to the house, like cleaning up the bedrooms, doing the dishes, cooking, groceries, cleaning practically everything, laundry, and the list goes on, like, if its related to the house then the girl does it.

The boys however deal with stuff outside the house, like any work that has to be done on the car, getting milk or eggs or roti or dahi, but they grow up thinking that cleaning up or doing chores is something that only a girl is supposed to do. And no, if you try to tell me only illiterate people are of this school of thought, you are wrong as my the friends and family mentioned above are at the same level as I am, they have all studied, gone to university support female education but still think a girl should be the one to clean because the boy shouldn't be disturbed by these petty things.

In my household, its very different.
My abba first off, lives in Dubai because of his job and he comes to Karachi to visit every three months or so, and amma goes there to stay with abba for like two or three weeks every two months or so.
This means that all the stuff that a dad typically does, like paying the bills, and basically keeping a roof over our heads, with food in our stomach and making sure we never go without anything we need had to be handled by amma and my brothers. Don't get me wrong, amma gets the money from abba, he sends it to her and every main decision is discussed with abba and all, but my brothers take care of literally a crapload of stuff outside the house, even if it just dropping me off at a restaurant with my friends or driving me to the McDonald's outside our house at 2 a.m. just so I can get my ice cream fix, my brothers have done loads, but for amma, thats not all they should do.

Now amma obviously is aware of all the work these two do out of the house and tends to make me do the housework because my brothers are usually tired and I almost always do it without complaint.
I say almost, because, I mean, I am an eighteen year old girl, lol, I have to complain every opportunity I get. :)))

Anyway, now getting to the point as to why amma is a badass.

The other day, I had gone out shopping with amma in the bazaar and was tired in the evening when we got back, so, I basically told bhaijan (translates literally into brother dear, but it can also mean older brother and I use the older brother translation of it, also, is pronounced :bhaai-jaan) to set the table for dinner and heat up the food basically and bhaijan goes all, 'Why should I? That's your work to do, it's not my job'
And amma hears it and the verbal bashing she gave bhaijan was epic.
She basically asked what he meant by that and then went into a rant about how ignorant he was and ever since this one night like three weeks ago, bhaijan and my other brother have not once complained when I have asked them to do something that is according to my entire khaandaan (family, like, extended family, including the uncles, aunts, the dreaded phuppos and chachis and khalas and mamanis) is larki ka kaam (a girl's job), they just shut their traps and do it quietly.

Like it has gotten to the point where I am now glad that if ever there is a time when my brothers have to live alone, I am glad that they have all the basic survival skills and at the very least will be able to eat without starving or poisoning themselves or dying from severe asphyxiation caused by a shitload of dirty clothes.

And thats all for now,
Bye!
Hudz.