Partners In Crime (erisol)

11

Karkat's POV:

"Welcome back Terezi!" I grinned when she walked through the door with her bags. She smiled and threw them down, hugging me tightly.

"Sup." Dave nodded from the couch, drinking a can of soda.

"Oh, hi Dave! I didn't know you were here." She smiled, "When did you get here?"

"A few days ago. Karkat picked me up from the airport and we've been chilling all weekend. How was your trip law thingy?"

"Amazing!" She grinned, "I learned so much, and they told me everything I need to know to get into the business. First things first, I have to go do the police academy junk, and continue studying law enforcement. I had so much fun. Oh! Karkles, I got you this!"

She reached into her bag and pulled
out a stuffed crab with a little police hat on. I grinned and snatched it, hugging it tightly. "Thank you!" I kissed her cheek.

She smiled and grabbed her bags. "I'm gonna go out my junk away. I'll be right back." She walked upstairs.

I walked to the kitchen, getting a soda out of the fridge. I walked over and , sat down on the couch as soon as she was out of sight.
"Do you think she knows?"

"Maybe not. I doubt she has had time to watch tv on her trip. She was probably engulfed in the law shit. I think we're good.."

"Good.." I sighed of relief, opening the soda, "I just hope Sollux and Eridan took everything they were suppose to.. I'm gonna have a hell of a time trying to come up with an excuse if they left something behind.."

Dave nodded. "If anything, Terezi's probably inspecting the place to see if you were doing anything shady."

"What the hell would I do that's shady?!" I crossed my arms. "I'm not shady! Do you think I'm shady?"

"Haha, I'm kidding dude." He smiled, "I'm just teasing you to get you all riled up and nervous. It's fun seeing you like that."

"Um.." Terezi walked back down the stairs. "Karkat?"

"Yes Terezi?" I looked over the couch and completely froze. "Oh shit.."

Dave looked, "Wha- ......oh shit.."

She was fucking holding a used condom with a tissue. She was pissed. "I went into the guest room to put away some stuff I had left in the closet in there, and I noticed the drawer to the condoms was open. They were scattered all in the drawer and I found this by the bed.. And the sheets are fucking ruined... Did... Did you cheat on me?" Her eyes filled with tears.

"No!! Never!!! Dave, help me out here!"

Dave stood up. "Truth is TZ, that ain't Karkat's jizz in that condom. It's mine."

She sighed of relief, and so did I. I took a drink from my soda when she continued with, "Oh-"

"I fucked Karkat."

Aaaaaaaand cue me spitting out the soda on complete shock.

"WHAT?!" Both Terezi and I yelled simultaneously.

I quickly stood and walked up to Terezi. "Terezi, he's lying! You know how Dave is with his stupid jokes! You know I'd never cheat on you!"

She slapped me and ran upstairs, locking herself in her bedroom.
I glared at Dave, "Really?! You couldn't say you invited a girl over or something?!"

"Dude, you both know I'm fucking hella gay. That excuse wouldn't of worked." He shrugged.

"THEN WHY NOT JUST SAY ANOTHER DUDE?!"

"All the guys in this town are shitty except for you. And you know I'd totally fuck you."
I slapped him.

Sollux's POV:

A while after the bank, we got a call from Karkat.
"ED, can you answer that?"

"Yeah.." He yawned and picked up the phone, putting it on speaker. "Hello-"

"I HOPE YOU FUCKERS ARE HAPPY!!!!!" Karkat yelled, "I JUST HAD TO DO THE WORST FUCKING THING EVER AND LIE TO TEREZI, SAYING I WAS CHEATING ON HER WITH DAVE BECAUSE YOU TWO IDIOTS CANT FUCKING THROW AWAY A CONDOM!!!!! SHE SCREAMED AT ME AND NOW ME AND DAVE ARE IN A FUCKING HOTEL ROOM BECAUSE SHE KICKED ME OUT!!!! I ALREADY GAVE DAVE HIS YELL FOR TELLING THE LIE IM THE FIRST PLACE, BUT ITS YOUR GUY'S FAULT FOR US EVEN HAVING TO LIE IN THE FIRST PLACE!!!!!"
"To be fair Karkat.." Dave mumbled, "She is kinda a bitch to you.. Like, that one time I came over, she was being super rude dude.."
"THAT WAS DIFFERENT!!!! THE POINT IS NOW IM SINGLE BECAUSE OF YOU GUYS!!!!!!"

"Hey!" I yelled, "It's your fault for even giving us the option to fuck! And who the hell leaves condoms in the guest bedroom?!"

"Apparently Karkat does.." Dave muttered.
"SHUT UP DAVE!!! WHERE THE HELL ARE YOU TWO ANYWAYS? YOU SOUND SHITTY ON THE PHONE!"

"Maybe it's because you're yellin' into the phone, Kar!" Eridan huffed, "Lowwer the vvolume.."

"I have no clue where we are actually.." I parked the car on the side of the dirt road. "I just drove and drove after the sirens sounded."

"Sirens?!" Karkat yelled. "Oh god, what did you two do?"

"Uh-"

"Karks, look at the tv." Dave said.

They were quiet for a moment but then Karkat yelled again. "YOU TWO ROBBED A BANK?!"

"Is it already on the news?!"

"YOU DID?!"

"Yeah! Sol said wwe needed the money!"
"We did, and we got a ton babe!" I smiled. "Calm down KK. We aren't going to get caught. We're sorry about Terezi or- Actually, no I'm not. Daves right. She is kinda a bitch."

"HOW WOULD YOU KNOW?"

"Oh. I snatched your phone and snooped through you texts with her. Sorry, not sorry. She's a bitch." I laughed, "But thanks for saving our asses from more trouble. At least now Dave actually has a shot of getting laid."

"DUDE!!!" Dave yelled, "NOT COOL."

"You knoww it's true Davve. You wwere so happy wwhen they broke up, huh? Maybe that's wwhy you lied and said that. Wwatch out Kar, the real criminal may be right next to you."

"IM HANGING UP NOW." Karkat groaned and hung up.

Eridan and I broke into a fit of laughter.
"Good one ED." I smiled, "That was hysterical!"

He smiled, "Learned from the best."
We drive for a couple more miles or so before stopping at a run down motel near a gas station. We bought a room for a night and cuddled. It's a good thing they couldn't catch our faces or the car..

We're safe for now..