Don't Die A Second Time (Bleach Fanfiction)

Chapter 9

Chapter 9: Secrets Revealed! & A Trade Off?

English words are in italics

-----Wednesday Morning-----

*Heirii's POV*

"Everyone, I have a confession to make..." I said from the front of class. I told Mrs. Ochi that the crossdressing game was getting boring, and she said at least to make it entertaining for her. So of course, I used my beastly public speaking skills to scare everyone's socks off~!

"What's wrong Sauke-Kun?" One of my fan-girls asked. That's right! I said it! I have fan-girls!

"Oh nothing's wrong, Yumiko-San. I'm just about to tell everyone my biggest secrets!" I grinned. Devan slammed her head on the desk, probably thinking I was going to tell them about our falsified marriage. Nope~! Two can keep a secret if their both unicorns!

"You're gay, aren't you?" Renji asked. Uryu took that as a reason to follow Devan and slam his head on the desk as well.

"Oh, no. I'm not gay. But I do like both genders. It's actually called pansexualism." I stalled. Devan rose to her feet and pulled a paper fan from her bag.

"Get on with it or I'll pumble you!" She yelled.

"Is our love child making you hormonal?" I asked. *Insert anime kitty face here*

"Damn you!" She shouted, slamming the fan down upon my head.

"Itai!" I cried as I fell to the floor. "But Dei-Cha-" She cut me off as she pressed her foot into my face. (A/N: Ow...)

"Tell them the truth..." She said.

"I paid you?" I asked smugly.

"The truth..." She repeated.

"We're miraculously still unicorns?" I questioned.

"Truth..."

"You're starting to sound like a broken record there, Devan." I replied.

"Three... Two... On-"

"MY REAL NAME IS HEIRII MEIRYU, I'M SEVENTEEN YEARS OLD AND I'M THE SEXIEST PIECE OF AMERICAN TRASH YOU'LL EVER MEET!!!"

Dramatic much...? ...Nah~!

"Heirii?!" Ichigo asked, standing from his seat.

"Ichi-Nii!" I sang loudly, springing to my feet, ripping off my wig, tossing it out of the open window, and running over to glomp him. It would've been epic had I not landed on face while trying to get to his desk.

"Why am I not surprised?" Renji huffed.

"What the hell do you mean, Fugly Pineapple?" I asked, standing up and crossing my arms.

"What did you just say?!" Renji growled. I decided to challenge him.

"I said you look like a fugly pineapple. I knew you were deaf and dumb. Stupid monkey." To my surprise, Renji settled down, though I noticed he wasn't looking straight at me.

"You have no idea, Ha-Chan..." He replied. Rukia and Ichigo snickered together.

"Bet it's an inside joke..." Devan said from behind me, crossing her arms with a smirk.

"It won't be an inside joke once we're out of school~!" I sang.

'I'll get you for this you damned Soul Reaper!' I screamed mentally, going to my seat as Mrs. Ochi calmed the class down. Of course, at this particular time, we were going over an English study, so I decided to zone out and let my mind travel elsewhere, allowing my gaze to stare out the window, a thoughtful expression adorning my face.