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note: you have two children, but with another guy and you've only been with shawn a year. shawn mendes
walking down the isles of christmas things, i can't help but notice catrin's non enthusiastic expression on her face. i sigh, dropping the thought and asking her when we get in the car.
once getting everything that we need, we go and pay. on the way to the car, she still wears the same face.
after we've settled in the car and driving home, i decide to bring it up.
"babe?" i ask.
"mhm?"
"do you not like christmas?"
she sighs. "not really. i know it's your favourite holiday which is why i try and be happy, but no. i guess you can call me a scrooge."
"why? why don't you like it?"
"i've never had a nice christmas, where you sit around the table surrounded by family. my two older brothers moved away so it was just me, nick and my dad because my mother left too. nicky would always go missing so my dad would make me go find him before we could have a dinner. it would happen every year and it slowly got worse. my dad became ill so we didn't really have christmas. he was ill over christmas for two years then died the december after, his funeral was christmas eve. my mother moved back to take care of me and nick, he turned worse every christmas, he'd turn up with random women who he'd just slept with. my mother didn't celebrate christmas because she's a jehovah witness, so it wouldn't be christmas it would just be a dinner. then i had the kids a few years after so i had to kind of play it up for them, kristian loved christmas so it wasn't too hard. then he fell ill and died the year after when the kids were ten and six, his family stopped coming to see the kids, nicky's still the same, he shows up drunk with mitchell. so it was really just me and the kids celebrating christmas on our own for four years."
"then you met me, huh?" i ask, glancing at her.
she nods. "the kids haven't had the best christmas' either, hence why they don't really get excited either. it just brings memories back of drunk people turning up or not having a loved one around or not seeing family because they don't want to put the effort in."
"i shouldn't have asked. i'm sorry babe." i say, grabbing her hand and placing a kiss on it.
"it's ok, i've noticed you looking at me questioningly when i haven't been enthusiastic about things to do with christmas."
"i love you. i promise to give you and the kids the best christmas' from now on." i say, smiling at her.
