" Hana, you do know you can choose to love again right? " He said as he was brushing my hair. " I know but It'll never be as precious as this. " I answered while I was playing with my fingers.
When i heaved my head, taeyong's glimmering eyes were all I can see. When he locked his eyes into mine, that was the time when I realize that I can't find someone who will look at me like how lee taeyong does. It'll take me another life time to find one.
" I want to tell you something" . He said as he leaned against the back of his wheel chair.
" what is it? " I answered, beaming nervously, hoping that he wasn't going to crack any bad jokes. " I hope our last 4 hours won't be put in to waste. " .
He took a small bite from his apple, paused for a while and winked at me. I blinked for A while, brought back to reality. taeyong somehow found it amusing. " I have a crush on you " . He begins to tease me again.
" ya, i have never ever called you oppa " i snapped, pointing my index finger directly at his pale face. " it's because you didn't try! "He scowled. " ne~oppaaa" i answered, making the pitch of my voice higher than usual. It was sort of disgusting but I've always wanted to call my boyfriend oppa. Joseph never let me call him that because he thinks it's childish. Taeyong's the opposite. He just went with the flow and complimented my vibe.
"How about I call you noona? "He said in a very seductive way. I could feel my body heating up and my cheeks getting red. Eottokeeeeeeee omayghhaaadddd stop lee taeyonggggggg
" ya what's wrong? You don't want to be called noona? Dongsaeng? Hoobaeya?"he added,making me even more uncomfortable. He shifted closer to me with our shoulders brushed against each other. " yaaaaa, why are you so quiet? Are you shy around oppa? Is that it? You want oppa to loosen up a bit? "
I sat straight with my whole body frozen and my eyes shaking, it feels like i wa brought back to high school. He gently touched my chin and stroked his fingers on my cheeks while flashing a nonchalant smirk. " ya, what are you doing-- hajima! " my entire body was trembling I could barely stand. I anticipated something is going to happen, something i've wanted to do with joseph for a long time. At that moment, i've never felt so loved in my entire existence. and at that moment too, I knew I will never be loved this much in my entire existence ever again.
While i was deeply immersed in my thoughts, I came to find that our faces were only inches away from each other. I planned to budge from my seat but he was clutching my arms and clasping my hand tightly, making it impossible for me to escape. And suddenly, the atmosphere changed. Every little thing mattered at that moment. The smooth flow of the curtains on the window, the clicking sounds of the stranger's footsteps in the corridor and the worrying noises of the machines near his bed were all that my brain could process. Nothing else. Not even His perfect features in front of me.
His short breath blew upon my cheeks as I heard his heart beat normally. I couldn't help but wrinkle my nose because it was ticklish. The tingling feeling ran up to my spine and made me shake my body lightly. When I was about to utter a word, a gasp from my mouth was the thing I could do before his soft lips landed in to mine. I unknowingly unexpectedly and instinctively kissed him back.
The very first kiss I had. The very last kiss I'll ever have.
I thought to myself as I rested my hand over his shoulder, slowly running my fingers through the back of his head
When we finally unlocked our lips, he said with a smile of satisfaction and contentment painted on his face " i've been waiting for this for 11 years. " then the corner of his lips twitched. I was indeed speechless and left in awe for I didn't know what to do after a kiss. Taeyong bitterly chuckled under his breath and muttered
"Remember when I was so mad at you for touching my things? "Taeyong said. "How could I forget?you almost threw me out of the house! " i answered confidently
" i cried that night for being dishonest. I felt guilty. As much asI wanted to spen more time with you-- "
" we're not supposed to talk about the bad things " i intereupted, pressing my palm against his mouth. " saranghae " he forced his self to speak despite the barrier in his lips.
Taeyong and I were on the balcony of his room, just enjoying the view of L.A.
Unaware of what will happen. Unable to predict what's coming. Our hands were perfectly twined with each other, it's like nothing could ever separate us except time.
" Song Hana, you don't know how much I love you " he whispered as a tear rolled down my cheeks. The machine that monitored his heart rate alarmed, giving us the sound that we've all been waiting for. And at that very moment, I knew it was time. this is it. I thought to myself, hastily dialing the digits his parents gave me hours ago. My hands were quivering because of the sudden and rapid situation. I was told to prepare but I was just so immersed by my last romance. The only thing that kept on running on my mind was how am I supposed to unwind everything. How am I supposed to stop time.
but the thing is, running after time is completely useless because it's the time who's after us. Who's chasing Lee Taeyong.
I panicked as more tears fall to the ground. I repeatedly whispered his name, hoping and praying that it was all just a dream.
I shut my eyes, pretending that I was asleep and when I opened my eyes, the first thing I saw was taeyong's hand, reaching out to me. " ya~ jongmal saranghae " and his hand collapsed down to his bed, then the door was crashed open.
doctors and nurses came rushing in. Taeyong looked at me for the last time as he shed a tear.
I had no other choice but to let them take him. I was hugging myself tightly as I followed them making their way out. His parents were already in the corridor, mourning. I walked towards them, biting my lips until they bled as they hurriedly approached me with arms open wide.
" He's going for it? " . I asked in a hollow voice. " He just can't take it anymore. I hope you'll have a safe flight back to Korea. " His mom added. " thank you for staying by his side. By the way, your mom is back at the apartment. She's waiting for you. You might wanna go home now. We can take it from here. " .
I hugged his mom and just cried in her arms. " I'm never going to love again. I hate him for making me fall for him. i will love him as long as I am still breathing" . I just kept on weeping in Eomma's arms until her jacket became wet. She tighten her embrace and finally i decided to let go.
--
As I made my way to The lee's apartment, I scanned through my phone.
It's everything we did for the last 12 months. It sort of hurts me and cheers me up at the same time.
There was a picture of him sleeping, brushing his teeth, coming out of the shower, being chased by dogs. Nonsense, irrelevant, insignificant but it made me smile for a second but tears again fell. It dropped down to the screen of my phone...
I entered the apartment and saw my mom pacing from one corner to another. the moment i she saw me, she ran towards me and tightly hugged me. " mianhamnida my dear, stop crying "
She just told me not to do so but There was nothing else i could to to take the pain away. I think my eyes are getting drier. Mom didn't knew what to do so she just let me be.
YOU ARE READING
play pretend° taeyong
Fanfiction"Just forget me. After all, nothing was real since the beginning right?"
