Young and Reckless (A Guns N' Roses Fan-fiction)

16. Why Do You Only Need Me When You're High?

It rarely rains but when it does, it's like the heavens pour all their tears, squeezing each heavy drop down to the earth. Some people are just the same; they conceal their feelings, bottle them up until they can't hold on anymore and they just explode with a great force like Mother Nature's.

Axl has never been the one to hide his emotions, he shows what he feels regardless of the situation and regardless of the people around him. Erin was a witness of every fit that man had. His attitude is enflamed as the color of his hair.

For a few months Erin stayed with me and she didn't had to narrate everything. Just by looking at her face, it was evident that she was so done with her relationship with him. She spilled the beans anyway and with that I started to see Axl in a different way. So what if he wrote Sweet Child for her? Even a dozen of ballads wouldn't make up for the times he had caused her physical and emotional hurt.

During those months, I came to realize that shopping and going to beauty salons can be therapeutic. I had to learn that from a supermodel who turned to be one good friend. There was this day where we just sat on the floor and talked after a trip to the mall. Our conversation revolved around the bits of our lives before meeting the boys but mostly it was them we talked about.

"You've known them long enough more than anyone have," Erin said while we were painting our nails. "And with all the chaos--all the drugs and different women that fame's brought them, you're still around. What makes you stay then?"

My answer to her question was a mere chuckle. I didn't know what to say, or I may have but I couldn't find the right words to put it up.

"I know you were different since day one, Emilia. I never pegged you as the type that would do the things they do...and I'm just amazed and curious on how you are able maintain a strong bond with them." She went on. "I'm sorry if my question offends you."

"Don't worry about it, girl." I said. "I stay friends with them maybe because that's how we're supposed to be."

I could've met new people and made new friends. I could've moved someplace else, in a new environment to start over. I had options but I chose to stay. What makes me stay? I still hadn't had an honest answer to that. Eventually, Erin left and flew to New York for good and even with her being gone, I still couldn't give the answer to myself.

The heavy raining never caused flooding, but the possibility of other road accidents due to the weather couldn't be denied. Every five minutes I stopped watching the replay of the American Music Awards to go look out to the window to see if a tree had fallen or a car crashed into something.

And so far, nothing happened. Sipping the last drop of my hot cocoa, I went back to the couch with my mountain of pillows to watch the boys on television, playing Patience with Eagles' drummer Don Henley. I cheered and swooned a little like a fan girl but slowly fell in a drowse while the night went by with its depressing mood. Misty and Lennon were happy on their own, playing somewhere in the room. Soon, a bunch of baby pugs would be popping out of Misty and somebody I know for sure would be thrilled to hear that.

It was the band's suggestion that Steven should get treatment for his worsening substance abuse. So he got into a rehab while the band continued their commitments without him. I visited Steven as often as I could and whenever I was with him, I made sure to bring him sketchbooks and coloring materials, his favorite candy bars, pictures of our dogs and of course some news from the outside world.

We hauled the long weeks together. I think it's given that most people who go through this kind of healing process get emotional. Steven was mostly sentimental, saying things like how he felt so alone, that he thinks his friends had turned against him. I showed my optimism towards his recovery, something he should look forward to as well. But most of all I made him see that he wasn't alone, that no matter how much I was disgusted with the drug addiction, I was always there by his side.