"Aw! Puddin, isn't she just the cutest little thing ever?" An obnoxiously loud squeal penetrated my ears, making me want to slap my hands over my bleeding eardrums. This woman needs to dial down her excitement or I'll go deaf. Why is she being so loud anyway? Haven't you ever heard of an inside voice lady?
I tried reaching up to shut out the sound sounds, only to fail miserably. My arms feel so weak and uncoordinated. What is going on? Have I been drugged? Did I get kidnapped?
"She looks normal." A deeper voice growled out the word normal like it was the most disgusting thing you could be. The sheer annoyance radiating from the second voice involuntarily made me flinch. I could feel something bubbling up in throat in response to his words.
Who is this person that is displeased with my looks? I know for a fact I happen to be a very gorgeous young lady. Boys go out of their way to win my favor. I opened my eyes so I could glare at the male that dared to classify me as normal, like I'm anything but extraordinary. I'll teach him a lesson.
"She's a baby, that's how she's supposed to look. Puddin look! She's trying to open her eyes."
Trying, being the key word again. Once again doing any kind movement proved difficult for me. My eyelids are so heavy and everything is blurry. I can't see anything but colorful blobs. I must be having a pretty strong trip. Whatever they have me on is some serious shit.
"Oh." She drawled out. "She has your eyes Mistah J. You're such a pretty little baby aren't you?" The woman continued to coo and baby-talk.
Okay, this is getting on my nerves. I can't see anything but this green blob off to the side and this white blob with pink and blue mixed in it hovering over me, worst of all my stupid body isn't responding to me the way I want it too. What kind of trip is this? Aren't drug highs supposed to fun and mystical? Nothing about this is fun.
Wait a second. Why does this gum ball lady keep calling me a baby? I know I'm cute and all, but I'm no baby. I am a young and beautiful lady. I try yet again to get some clarity by asking the gum ball lady what is going on, but you guessed it, my mouth isn't working. I can hardly move my mouth and tongue to make sound, all that comes out is slobber. So gross.
What is going on with me? Is this punishment for being amazing? If this is a test to make me become more humble, then I get it. I won't be so conceited about myself anymore. I'll stop being a narcissist, just make this awful trip end already.
"This kid better not get in the way Harley." The green guy threatened the gum ball lady. I could feel her arms tightening around me.
I'm not a kid! I'm not a baby either! I am a grown lady got damn it!
"Of course not Puddin. Lucy is going to be our perfect little monster." The woman lifted me high in the air so that I was looking down at her.
Alright, I know I'm a little on the light side, but this lady should not be able to lift me like I'm a bag of flour she's inspecting. I also should not be helplessly flailing in the air. I certainly should not be babbling and smiling at the woman gleefully giggling. All of this is wrong.
This is crazy.
This is a joke. This is one big joke.
HaHaHaHaHa. I'm laughing along with the crazy gum ball lady.
There is no way I'm a baby and there is now way my name is Lucy. Like really? Lucy?
Oh, Lucy! I'm home.
HaHaHaHaHa
I am going crazy from this bad trip.
xxxxxxx
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I Started a Joke
FanfictionLucy Quinzel, the trickster. The spawn of the two most notorious villains of Gotham. Somehow I had been born again, but this time I wasn't going to be stuck with a normal life. No, no, no. Normal is a setting on the dryer. People like us don't get n...
