Chapter 4-The Contract.

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My eyes glistened with the threat of tears that needed to be spilled. I kept looking at my face in my review mirror as I was on my way to have lunch with Sarah. My cheeks were pink with frustration at the inability to release them and I was at my wits end. I had been feeling this way since I had given birth to Evie. Maybe it was some kind of postpartum depression. I loved my children, my husband and I really enjoyed Rory. I never thought about hurting any of them. I just felt like, even though I had several things to fill me with happiness, there was an empty void inside of me that needed to be filled.
Gripping the stirring wheel, I tried to get the phantom pain that had consumed me for the last three months to release itself to no avail.
I suppose it was good that I was going to the first meeting with my new therapist when I got out of school. Dominic had suggested I just talk to him but he was my husband. Although he was amazing with helping others out I just didn't feel comfortable explaining to him my emotions or my thoughts in a non marital sense.
Coincidentally, Sarah had chosen the diner that Zeke had humiliated Olivia in with the waiter guy. I still had yet to find out what he gained from doing that to her. More obedience? Sexual drive? or just plain cruelty?
Thankfully Sarah chose a booth on the other side of the place. Evie was with her, seeing my baby girl took my mood up several notches. Lunch went well. Sarah and I talked about normal girl things. The twins, Evie, cleaning, cooking. I even decided I would throw her a birthday party next Friday.
As it neared time for me to go back to the school I decided to drop the news about Elijah and Sutton.
"Did you ever call Elijah?" I asked her when the booth was cleared of our lunch dishes.
"I did. He wants to me to have dinner with him." She answered, a frown on her face. I could tell she was unsure about his invitation and that was a great thing considering what I was going to tell her.
"You shouldn't. Last night, when we went to the club, he was there. With Sutton. I didn't know anything about it until then but apparently they are seeing each other." I chose my words very carefully. Sorry, but on one should have to hear that their man left them for a devil like Sutton Shaw. Sarah just stared at me for several gut wrenching moments before she picked her tea glass up and  took a drink.
"I know."
"You know?" I had no doubt my jaw had dropped open. Well that was enough to have me fucking stunned. "Well...You're not going to see him are you?" I asked, looking over at her in disbelief. Because if she did that was just a recipe for disaster....and heartache.
"Maybe...I don't know, Amelia. Despite him being a total asshole, I do love him. And you're the last person I thought would judge me-" Sarah quickly became offensive and I reached across the table, placing my hand on the back of hers.
"I'm not judging you, Sarah. Trust me I am imperfect in so many ways. I just don't want you to get hurt...but if that is what you want I will back you. If things do end badly, which I am not saying they are-" They definitely would. "-I will be there for you, ok?" I felt sympathy for her then. In any situation where Sutton was involved there was bound to be a terrible outcome. I hadn't lied, I would be there for her and she would be begging me to tell her 'I told you so.'
~
"So...You have a picture perfect family and life; Two sons and a new daughter, an amazing husband who allows you to have a lover, a good job. You told me you think something is missing. You feel sad a lot...lost. Any idea what that might be?" Dr. Dubre asked. She was a middle aged woman who reminded me of Elle. Except she was British. Her office was cozy. Unlike Dominic's her desk was in a different room. I was sitting on a comfortable sofa directly across from a matching chair that she occupied.
"I don't know. That's part of the reason why I decided to start seeing you." I tried to make my response sound as unrude as possible. "I guess I just don't like the feeling of being in control or making decisions. Not about the kids or what day of the month we choose to pay bills...More like when I am with Dominic and Rory-I told you about their lifestyles. My husband is amazing and enjoy what we have. I also enjoy what Rory and I have...I just feel like their is more to be offered...make sense?" I asked her, looking up from my intertwined fingers at my new therapist. She was frowning, not in a bad way but in a way that said 'Im listening and I want to help.' That was why I had taken an immediate liking to Dr. Dubre. 
"Of course. So it's sexual?" She didn't give me a direct answer. Maybe because I was so not good at explaining things...especially my feelings.
"Maybe...a little. Dominic...he is gentle and chivalrous. I love that about him. Our relationship is sensual and romantic. I wouldn't change that. Rory is a lot like that. We don't do romance though. Like my husband I know he has a lot to offer the only difference is I can tell that Rory wants to. Ya know, take me further, to more extreme places..." I had been wanting to say that to someone for awhile now. But pregnancy had gotten in the way, then work and school.
"What's holding you back from telling him that? Would Dominic be disapproving?"
"No...he wouldn't be. He says I should experiment...even if he did disprove that would be strange. I mean, I carried Rory's child. The three of us take care of her, as a team."
"Right. So what is holding you back? Fright?" Dr. Dubre asked again. Fright was an understatement. 
"I suppose..." We sat in silence for several minutes, I thought about what I had told her. What if that wasn't the reason for my...emptiness? I looked back at the Dr and asked her that exact question.
"It might not be. Its probably going to take more then one session to find out but lets take things one step at a time. Why don't you go spend the night with your Lover. Talk to him...get to know him more. You don't have to sleep with him. By what you have told me that's all the two of you do, besides taking care of the baby." Dr. Dubre suggested and come to think of it, I didn't know much about him. I knew his body, every single handsome inch of it but what did he want from me? Did he feel like he was stuck because of Evie?
"When you come back on Monday you can tell me how it went...make sure to pay attention to your feelings." She added.
I wanted to take my relationship with Rory Shaw further, beyond my comfort zone, or the zone that I hadn't stepped out of since I had first been with someone.  The bondage and the spanking was all new to me but...I wanted to feel the emotional side of things. I wanted to make time. Time where I wasn't in control of my decisions or my body but they were controlled for me. I needed to let go of...whatever this was I was feeling. The raw ache that consumed me almost constantly.  Even if I didn't know what it was...I needed something to numb it.
~
I told Dominic about the things I had talked about with Dr. Dubre. I wasn't going to go to stay with Rory like she had suggested but Dominic told me it was a great idea.
So, after we had gotten the children fed, bathed and sleeping soundly we watched a movie and Dominic went to bed as well.
By ten-thirty I was walking up the steps to Rory's house and for some odd reason I was nervous.
What if he wanted nothing more then to just be a dad and get the pleasure of screwing me whenever he wanted? If that was the case I would terminate our personal relationship and it would strictly just be the two of us discussing Evie's health, taking care of her when she gets sick, or maybe...ten years from now figuring out would pay for her cheer classes.
Fifteen seconds after I rang his doorbell the front door opened and my stomach leaped. I was on edge.
"Hi." I said, tucking my arms around me as the smell of a burning fire entered my nostrils and the trapped warmth from his house flowed out,  teased my frozen cheeks.
"Hey, are you okay?" Rory asked, frowning as he glanced behind me as if he would find Dominic there too.
"I'm fine. Are you busy?" I asked him. "Can I come in?" My bones were rattling inside of my body. I fucking hated the winter.
"Of course." He gave me a look that said 'You don't need to ask to come in. Why didn't you just walk in to begin with.' when stepped aside I entered and Rory quickly closed the door behind me. "Is Evie okay?" He asked next from behind me as I went through the foyer. It still looked the same...besides the pictures of his wife he had taken down and the awfully beautiful,  very uncomfortable furniture was gone.
"Yes, she is sleeping. Beautifully and soundly. I just came to...hang out." I turned to face him and he looked very confused. "I mean unless you are busy. I can leave."
"No...no you don't have to leave. Im just surprised. You never come here." He shrugged and chuckled nervously. That made since, I didn't ever come here. Only once when he and Sutton had invited us that night we had gone to the diner.
I thought earlier in the diner was a coincidence...
"Want some hot chocolate or something? It's freezing outside." I slipped out of my jacket and he took it from me to hang on the coatrack. His house was so pristine for a guy who was single. "Sure. I would like that." A minute later I stood in his kitchen, watching him prepare the hot sweet drink for me. When he was done I took the glass and we sat down at the table. "I wanted to talk to you about a few things." I finally said after he just watched me drink in silence.
"Alright." He said and shifted in the chair uncomfortably. I couldn't help but smile.
"Don't be timid...it's nothing bad. I was just wondering if you feel trapped. Because we have Evie...You don't have to sleep with me because of that and if that is the reason why you do then I don't want it." I said and looked away from him. Was I even making any fucking sense?
"Well I like you. That's why you came over? To see if I like you?" Rory had a small grin on his face as if he was not taking this seriously. 
"I went to my therapist today...Because I have been feeling like...total shit. I don't really know why either. It's pretty confusing. I told her that I didn't want to be in control sometimes. Not with my family or work. With you. I want...more."
"More?" Rory asked, cocking his eyebrow and I laughed,  knowing exactly what he was thinking.
"Not like moving in with us or marrying me but like...I want to do more of this-whatever this is. I feel something from the way you dominant me, the way we  connect." I felt my cheeks warm when he just stared at me. His face didn't give anything away as to what he was thinking. I sighed heavily, "I want a relationship like Zeke and Olivia. You know, without the romance and flowers. I mean I probably wouldn't want to do the things they do because that's a bit extreme-"
"You want a dominant and submissive relationship. Is that what you're saying?" Rory interrupted. I laughed nervously and nodded at him.
"Yup."
When he got up and walked to the fridge I watched him in silence. He didn't say a word until half the long neck he had retrieved was halfway gone. "Sure. We can do that, if that is what you want. Sure." Rory nodded and leaned against the counter to stare at me. "But you need to know. I am nothing like Dominic."
His words sounded threatening but I shrugged like they hadn't bothered me. "I don't want you to be anything like Dominic. I already have him and you couldn't come close." I replied. That was true. Dominic had my heart, I would choose him first above anything, besides my children. But I don't think that's what Rory meant when he said that..."So...?"
"I have a contract that you will have to sign." He said, finished off his beer and grabbed another. I frowned as he came back to sit with me.
"A contract?"
"Yea. You-The Submissive- will sign over yourself. To ensure that you are willing to be used for pleasure. My pleasure-The Dominant. And yours." Rory added, and smiled at me. "Submitting to me will be the single greatest prize of our relationship. It will also ensure your safety. We will go over what you are and are not willing to do. In other words, set boundaries. Its mainly just for you, so you feel comfortable. But don't worry its not a non-disclosure agreement...unless you would like it to be." Rory paused and I took the opportunity to speak up. "No...I trust you. And you should trust me. Anything else?"
"We don't have to do the contract right this moment but we will. Soon...The safest thing to start with for now; I do have a rules. For now I will go over just a couple.  Listen well because I won't continuously repeat myself." Rory pointed out and I held back my smile.
"Right. I am all ears." I didn't want him to think I thought this amusing or a joke because I didn't. So I sat back and listened.
"I would like to be called Sir, not Rory, when we are alone. You should keep a diary that I can have access to. You don't have to take it home, keep it in my bedroom. Your ability to cum is in my hands, meaning seek approval rather it is on your own or together, with me." When he stopped talking I gave him a curious look.
"That's it?"
"For now." Just then he rose and held his hand out to me. When I grabbed on he pulled me up gently. "You're still cold. Come on and warm up in the shower."He said and I didn't argue that as he pulled me from the kitchen.
~
Fully dressed, it was clear Rory had no intention of joining me and I  knew his only intention was to watch. I happily turned toward him so he had the perfect view as I  washed and touched the most intimate parts of my body. There was not one word spoken between us as I soaped my hands and ran them everywhere, over my breast down my belly, between my legs, down them...back between them. Dr. Dubre had said I didn't need to sleep with him but I highly doubted that wouldn't happen.
"Why don't you come in?" I asked as I rinsed my body.
"I had a shower earlier. Plus, I like watching you." Rory replied and his eyes lingered on my breast...then lower, where I perposly kept taking my hand.
I didn't reply to that as I finished quickly and stepped into the large white towel he offered. I was much warmer but I really wasn't cold to begin with.
I was surprised when he dried me off himself. Starting at my shoulders and gradually going down until he knelt to take care of my legs. When he was done he threw the towel onto the counter and stood up.
I didn't move as Rory stepped behind me and  a second later he pulled my body against his. His arms encircled me and his fingers came to rest against my bare mound.
I closed my eyes, enjoying his body pressed against me. There was no hiding the erection that rested against my ass. As his fingers slipped between my folds and teased the soft little bud that was my clit I quietly moaned.
"You are mine now. We will please each other to unimaginable lengths. Are you sure want this, Amelia?" Rory whispered against my ear.
"Yes." The word left my lips in more of a breathless moan as his fingers continued their taunt.
"Yes?"
"Yes...Sir."
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-Lu💋

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