Harry Styles Imagines

30 - Do you ever...? (au)

Do you ever...?

                                                        I get up from my couch when I hear someone knocking on my door in the middle of the night. Curiosity awakes in me because I have no clue who it could be. Who walks around in the middle of the night while it's cold and windy? Carefully, I open the door, expecting the worst although I don't really have a clue what that would be. A murderer? But he wouldn't knock, right?

 When I fully open the door I see no one else than Harry. My heart beats faster and a headache appears. His green eyes are bloodshot and at first I think he is drunk but soon I realize that he was crying. That adds even more pain to my aching heart.

  "Do you ever...Do you ever had that feeling as if someone ripped out your heart and stomped onto it? This feeling as if everything that was keeping you happy dies? This feeling that you can't even describe because it just hurts you in every fucking way?" Harry greets me and his hands clench into fists, "And do you know who ripped out my heart? You did."

 I close my eyes and hold myself onto the door. It would be easier to resist him if he stopped saying those things. I don't want to love him. He hurts everyone. I'm tired of being hurt.

  "You said I hurt everyone around me and I don't realize what a mess I create with that and now look at me! I'm a mess without you!" His words sound sloppy. I was wrong he did drink but the fact that he is drunk doesn't ease the pain in my heart. It doesn't make his words less painful.

  "Everyone gets hurt at one time, even you," I reply cold, "You deserve to feel pain."

 Harry takes a step into my house and grabs my waist, pressing me against the wall, his hands cup both my cheeks. "You are the only one who can take the pain away. You have...so much control over me. And I would hate you for having control over me if I wouldn't love you so fucking much."

  "You don't even know what love is."

  "Teach me." He whispers and kisses me in his drunk state and I judge myself for enjoying it. No for loving it. I love his lips on mine, I love that his touch is setting me on fire. As he pushes me against the wall his one hand grabs my thigh and puts it around his waist. Oh, how I love and crave this man.

  "I love you." Harry whisper multiple times against my lips, trying not to break our kiss but he desperately tries to let me hear those words. And I did hear them and I couldn't be any happier that his words sound so honest.

  "I love you too."

 And here; the words slipped out of my mouth. I told him I love him and he immediately stopped kissing me. A frown takes over my face. What if he just played with me? What if he just wanted me to say the words to see that he conquered another heart just to break it in the next second? To show me that he has control over me now that I told him I love him. But he sounded so desperate when he explained how hurt he is, he sounded so honest when he murmured he loved me.

  "What did you say?" Harry whispers, still holding me so tight I can barely breath and I can hear his heartbeat thumping in his chest. His green eyes shimmer lightly in the dark but I can only see the affectionate look because I'm so close. No, he didn't lie to me. He truly loves me.

 "I love you."

 It makes no sense to hide my love anymore. It never made sense. Being afraid can prevent you from things but love is bigger than fear.

 Love will always win.