remember that you're mine {joshler}

xiv. said he'd come home monday

"What's this?" Mark asked looking up from the file that had been slapped down onto the table in front of him.

"The police report for Jenna's death." Tyler replied coldly.

"Where did you get it?" Mark asked surprised, he put down the apple he'd been eating in favour of wiping his hands on his trousers before cautiously opening the folder.

"I have a contact, he says he didn't alter it, thought maybe you could see if it had been tampered with?" Tyler rubbed his face with a heavy sigh before sitting opposite his best friend.

"Tyler, this lists her death as a suicide." Mark said looking up at him.

"I know. It doesn't make sense." He said looking anywhere but at the file.

"There's not even any pictures?" Mark was confused.

"Apparently there wouldn't have been a report at all if her father hadn't reported her missing earlier that day." The subject was hard to talk about, but Tyler couldn't avoid it anymore, he was tired and angry at the world and he wanted answers, no he deserved them.

"Her death certificate says the same?" Mark asked scanning the form again. He just looked up in time to catch Tyler's curt nod.

"Why cover it up? Why wouldn't my dad get Josh in trouble with the feds, it would give them a warrant to go after him, they could've shut down the entire Dun operation? Everyone knows they've been waiting for a reason to go after the Duns for years, this would be perfect."

"Not if he knew they had an alibi." Mark stated his face paling considerably as the pair made eye contact.

Almost in sync the pair stood up.

"Salih's stuff is still in the basement." Mark said before gathering up the folder and heading off.

They entered the small room, Tyler shivered at the draft, his eyes fixating on the blood stains on the wall, his mind reliving the trauma he'd experienced the last time he'd been in the room. Mark stared too, before snapping himself out of it and moving over the computer set up and powering it up. Tyler remained transfixed until Mark let out a small whoop of pride as he successfully guessed Chris' password. Tyler shook his head as though to wipe it clean and leant over Mark's shoulder to inspect the files.

"There's hundreds of logs, this could take all night." Tyler commented frustrated, and Mark nodded scrolling through never-ending documents.

"Wait." He hovered over a file with the dates corresponding to the week Jenna died. Mark clicked it and sure enough, a full log of every Dun's whereabouts was listed for all seven days.

Mark skimmed it quicker than Tyler could, Tyler focusing on a surveillance shot of Josh, in a grey Nasa t-shirt, his arm around a girl laughing as the went into a Starbucks. There were photos of his dad meeting his suppliers, pictures of Josh's sisters, the one at university, the other in her house, bouncing a baby on her hip, Josh's brother Jordan was playing baseball with friends it seemed. Mark kept reading and scrolling, showing Tyler more photos. Photos of Josh and his family, happy and healthy and getting on a plane.

"Wait." Tyler said, hand on Mark's shoulder.

"They flew to Los Angeles for a long weekend, the entire family." Mark finished his thought. "Josh, his siblings, Mr. and Mrs. Dun, sister's husband and baby all of them. They flew out six hours before Jenna was discovered missing, if they'd taken her, then why fly out of the state –without her- immediately after?" Mark asked.

"Because they didn't, did they?" Tyler confirmed. He felt sick. Mark searched the document to see if there were any more details, there was a report added to the bottom, attached pictures of the Dun family filing off the plane at LAX a contact in LA sending intel to Chris, the emails were screenshotted and attached, he was very thorough.

Tyler stared at the pictures of Josh, he looked years younger even though only it wasn't even a year since, his smile made something in Tyler's chest tighten immensely. But there was a sour feeling as he saw his arm slung around the same petit redheaded girl from before, he looked like he really liked her and Tyler knew he hated her, knew that he was jealous despite throwing away any right to feel that way.

"So, my father gets Chris to tell him when the Dun's leave the state, kidnaps Jenna and plays it off as the Duns, but one thing still doesn't add up." Tyler says a lump forming in his throat.

"What?"

"Why did he kill her?"

Silence fell over the two men as the harrowing thought set in.

-x-

"I'm glad I couldn't do it." Tyler's voice was timid as he sat opposite Josh once again. Josh looked up at him, expression broken. "I wanted to, I thought I did at least, because I blamed you for Jenna, and I blamed myself for Brendon. Ya know, I thought about just ending it all, ending myself instead, because I couldn't bear the thought of becoming my father, of-of losing you."

Josh continued to stare, gaze boaring into Tyler like a drill. Tyler took a deep breath and tried to continue. "I backed myself into an impossible corner, I could make my mistakes right, get Brendon out, avenge Jenna, or I could let the guilt and pain eat me alive, but then I realised that killing you wasn't gonna make the pain go away, it was only gonna make it worse. I'd already lost my first love, there was no way I could give up my second."

Josh shifted then, his stony expression cracking for just a second, but he remained silent.

Tyler tried to keep speaking but instead he crumbled, breaking down in his hands. "I'm so sorry Josh, I-I hate myself, I hate what I let happen to you, I'm so sorry." He sobbed out, elbows resting on the table as he cried into his palms. He felt cold fingers curl around his wrists and pull his hands away.

"I know you didn't kill her." Tyler said as Josh stared at him still, fingers squeezing his wrists tighter. "It doesn't ever justify what I did to you, it never will, i-I don't know who I've become but I don't want to be him anymore." Josh stayed silent and Tyler continued to sniffle and attempt to wipe his nose on his shoulder.

"When I gave you concussion, who was that? Which Tyler was I making love to?" Josh's voice was raw from lack of use, laced with pain, a mixture of both physical and emotional. Tyler froze, blinking and sniffing as he stared at Josh.

"Me. Th-that was real, the real me." Josh's eyes seemed to be glassy with brewing tears and Tyler couldn't help the way his hard snapped.

"Well, he's the guy I fell in love with, so was he the one who tried to kill me?" Tyler let out another sob, biting his lip to hold it in as he shook his head vigorously.

"I love you." Tyler sobbed out. "I can never forgive myself for hurting you, you don't have to accept my apology, just know that I mean it. I'm so sorry." He'd put the broken and charred pieces of his heart on the table, if Josh wanted to crush them to dust then Tyler would consider it an honour, it was more than he deserved at this point.

Josh shook his head slowly, this was painful.

"Tyler, you thought I killed the love of your life and you still couldn't kill me? Even when it was the only choice you felt you had?" He clarified, his grip on Tyler's wrists so tight it hurt but Tyler said nothing only nodded.

"I couldn't hurt you."

"I want to be alone now." Josh mumbled and Tyler felt like his whole body had just been crushed with a hammer, like every bone had shattered leaving him in agony, a crumpled mess on the floor. Holding back more ugly sobs he nodded, but Josh didn't let go of his wrists.

"Come back tomorrow." He said slowly, before releasing Tyler's wrists and looking away. Tyler nodded before slowly exiting the room, taking a deep breath in order to snuff out the small flicker of hope Josh had lit in his chest.

He immediately headed to his room, laying in the dark as he stared at the ceiling, desperately trying to pull himself together, to formulate a plan to get Josh and his brother out of captivity, even if Josh never forgave him, Tyler would save him, he owed him at least that.