Modest Delusions - Book 3 (Larry Stylinson AU)

Chapter 36 - Hope is a four letter word

Hope is a four letter word

After seven excruciating hours Harry was released, Abigail was on countless phone calls and Niall paced up and down the hall. His fingernails were in shreds, he bit his fingers anxiously as he waited for Harry, for something to happen. Liam called him, Porter had shown up at the hospital and Niall told him to meet them at the Loft. Liam decided he would go and get Zayn and Louis, Niall wasn’t sure he was ready for Louis to see Harry in such a state. Niall argued with Liam for over twenty minutes, they agreed to just get Harry home before anyone showed up. He felt guilty, a heavy weight in his stomach for keeping Louis away but after everything Niall just didn’t know if Harry was ready for that, for Louis. 

Yes they kissed, yes they had spoken but they had a long, long way to go before things were fine again. 

Logan came through the door, blonde hair a mess and he opened his arms. Niall fell into them, “It’s really bad,” Niall’s voice shook. 

Logan sighed, “I heard.”

“I think-“

“He needs help,” Logan said as he pulled away and looked at Niall’s pale face. “He wasn’t in a good way when I was with him and-“

“You left!” Niall stated with a look of confusion. 

“He needs to be with Louis, he loves Louis…” Logan sighed as he played with the red cords of his hooded jacket. “I love him Niall but he’ll never love me the way he loves-“

Niall nodded, “Louis.”

“I used to be an addict,” Logan confessed. 

Niall frowned, “What?”

“My boyfriend he…” Logan paled, he took a deep breath and Niall watched him carefully. “He died of a drug overdose next to me, I was so fucked up I couldn’t call for help. I woke up and he was just…” He trailed off and ran a hand through his hair. “I told Harry because he needs to realise what sort of effect this addiction will have on everyone around him.”

“Oh God!” Niall shook his head, a shaking hand raised to his mouth, “I’m so sorry.”

Logan smiled, “Thanks.”

“That’s…”

Logan finished his sentence, “Exactly why I can’t watch Harry kill himself.”

Niall flinched at his confession, “I wouldn’t be able to-“

“We,” Logan squeezed his shoulder, “Won’t let that happen.”

“They tasered him,” Niall said. 

Logan paled, he was ghostly white, “Fuck.”

“He’s,” Niall wiped his eyes. “He’s losing it.”

Logan shook his head, “It’s not too late Niall, we’ll get him back.”

Niall nodded and he focused on his shoes, blinking back the stinging tears, “Porter didn’t know who else to call.”

Logan frowned as he sat down on the sticky plastic chairs that lined the far wall, “What about Louis?”

“Do you really think Harry wants Louis to see him like this?” Niall wondered if they were going about this all the right way? Maybe Harry did want Louis with him. So much was happening, he was being stretched in so many directions that he felt thin. Jennifer, he hadn’t seen her and the thought made him feel sick. Liam had forgiven him, which was a plus but Rachel confessed. Their Rachel, the manager who vowed to be different, to protect them was just as bad as the rest of them. Niall sat down next to Logan with a heavy sigh and stared at his hands, “This is so many shades of fucked up.”