Remnants of the Heart | Kim Taehyung

05: savourer

ACT 1 — SCENE 5
SHE SAVORS.

           THE AMOUNT of times Seojung has walked to the front door only to go back to the living room is embarrassing. Taehyung's jacket is in her hands, has been since she decided that she would return it to him today half an hour ago. And in those thirty minutes, Seojung has done nothing but chicken out every time her hand is already on the door handle. It's been more than a week and Taehyung hasn't asked for his jacket back even when during the times they ran into each other. As much as Seojung loved the idea of wearing Taehyung's clothes, it felt weird having it in her room. Like it's not for her to keep. Plus, this can be an excuse for her to see Taehyung again, but it's not exactly working out as she planned.

Seojung doesn't know what's so hard about walking to Taehyung's house, knocking on the door, and handing him the jacket. Doesn't know why her heart pounds just from the thought of Taehyung on his doorstep, probably in his pajamas with hair sticking out everywhere, a disheveled sight Seojung wishes she can see every day for a long time. And it's not like she's never been to Taehyung's house. But there had always been Jimin there with her. She never had a reason to go there alone. So doing this is like taking a big leap out of her comfort zone.

But Seojung does manage to leave the house after another ten minutes of having an internal argument with herself. The girl bites her lips as her finger press the doorbell. She waits, counting the seconds before the door knob turns. Contemplates on going back home and maybe spare herself any possible embarrassment, but that's when the door opens.

Taehyung greets her with a wide smile that puts the sun to shame, but she can immediately notice the bags adorning his eyes. He says her name with a yawn and she almost squeals because it's so adorable, feels like her heart is about to burst.

"I, uh, came to give this back to you." she hands him his jacket back, tried to avoid his eyes as she does but it's hard when her attention is automatically on him whenever he's around. She hates it, hates how much control he has over her. He doesn't even have to say anything and she would do whatever he wants her to. Sometimes she wishes she never met him in the first place.

Taehyung thanks her and asks if she would like to come in for cookies his mother baked the previous day. Seojung says yes, but she didn't know that it'd be just them in the house. Realizes this as she steps inside and notices the quiet. Almost too quiet. There's not even a single bark from Taehyung's dog, finds out that soonshim is at the groom and everyone else just happens to be out as she follows Taehyung into the living room. He tells her to make herself at home as he sits on the floor and goes back to playing his video game.

Looks like Taehyung has turned the living room into his sanctuary for the day. There are takeout boxes on the coffee table and candy wrappers strewn everywhere. Must be nice, having the house all to himself. Seojung plops down on the couch and takes a cookie from the coffee table. She's always loved mrs. Kim's baking. Makes her wish she could bake that well. She watches Taehyung play and tries not to feel awkward, tells herself that it's just Taehyung, and that she's been in his house millions of times before. Does nothing to calm her down, though. What kind of girl wouldn't freak out at being alone in a house with her crush?

And it doesn't help that he's just. . . There. Sitting on the floor, so close, and she can do nothing but stare at him. This was a bad idea. Being alone with Taehyung is not going to help her forget about this stupid crush. He's leaving soon. She needs to spare herself the pain.

Seojung clears her throat. The least she can do is start a conversation. "Have you and jimin made up yet?"

"I called him last night," Taehyung says without taking his eyes off the tv screen, "he picked up, surprisingly, but still sounded like he wanted nothing to do with me. So I said my apologies, told him how much of a douchebag I was and if he wanted to punch me one more time I'd let him, but all he said back to me was 'whatever'. Then he hung up."

Seojung sighs. "He's always been hard-headed. You and I both know that."

"Yeah. Just sucks that I'll be leaving the city with one less friend, y'know?" Taehyung pauses the game and puts the controller on his lap. He looks at her for a second, disappointment painted all over his face that her heart can't help but break. Even though it was his fault, Taehyung genuinely feels terrible and wants nothing but having Jimin back. She can see it clearly. Wonders when knowing what he's feeling became one of her expertise.

"I really hope you two can work out. I don't like the guys he hangs out with now."

Wants nothing but to inch closer, put an arm around his shoulder and comfort him, but she knows she'd stop breathing before any of that ever happens. So she stays in her spot and gives him her condolences from her heart.

"It's cute how protective you are over your brother." Taehyung cracks a small smile. It's enough to make her smile, too.

"He'd do the same with me. His other friends are. . . I don't know them that well. I don't know if they're just going to pull him into doing some weird shit."

They're the type of guys mothers and fathers warn their sons not to mix with. The ones who don't really care if they fail, and is somehow still not kicked out of school yet. Jimin has always been acquaintances with guys like that. He's acquaintances with everyone. But Seojung never needed to worry since he always had Taehyung by his side. Now, she hopes that heartbreak won't drive her brother into doing things he would regret months from now.

"Are you saying that you like me better?" the corners of Taehyung's mouth quirk up. God, that smirk. She hates it so, so much.

"I've always liked you best," slips out of her mouth before she can spare a single thought.

It's annoying how her mouth works faster than her brain. Would always lead her to saying embarrassing things like these. Would always end up embarrassing herself in front of people she doesn't want to seem like a fool in front of. Seojung's well aware of the blush that's forming on her cheeks, and she's pretty sure that Taehyung is too with the way his smirk turns into a smile. A satisfied smile. The smile some guys usually have whenever girls praise them.

"Cute," he says before he starts his game again. Goes back to being focused on the screen like nothing happened. And perhaps nothing did to him. But for Seojung, there is a riot happening in her stomach and she fears that her heart might just burst out of her chest. Knows that she's still blushing even a minute after their conversation ended.

And this is all because he called her cute.

Taehyung's ringtone blasts, making her momentarily forget that this was the best day of her life so far.

"Mind checking that for me?" Taehyung's too engrossed with his game to make time for calls. Seojung reaches out for his phone on the coffee table, reads the name on the screen.

"It's. . . Mina?"

Mina's a girl in Taehyung's year. A very pretty one, at that. Mina is a package deal. She's got the brains, the looks, and the personality. She's that kind of girl guys can't help but like. Seojung has always been jealous of her, but it's just that. No one can ever really hate a girl like Mina.

"Nevermind then. Leave it." Taehyung sounds like he's not interested. Fed up. Bored. This should make Seojung relieved. But then she starts thinking that there's probably a lot of girls on his phone and a lot that he talks to on a daily basis.

It just hurts having to accept that she's not the first and only girl he wants to call every day. Hurts how much she wants him to know how she feels, but is too scared to say something. Hurts being not even the second thought, but the one that only comes once in a blue moon.

Or maybe not at all.