Remnants of the Heart | Kim Taehyung

25: trouver

ACT 3 — SCENE 1
THEY FIND.

WINTER
2017

THE BEAUTY of winter mornings lies in the comfort of being tucked in the softest blanket with arms wrapped firmly around your waist and feeling the warmest you've ever felt. All of this is broken when Seojung is woken up from her peaceful sleep by the blast of her alarm that she puts on snooze with a groan, making the body resting beside her stir at the disruption. Taehyung mumbles something incoherent and tightens his grip on her body, snuggling his face into the back of her neck. She wants nothing more than to go back to sleep in the embrace of the boy who has been keeping her warm for months but knows that there are things she needs to do, places she needs to go to.

Everything's better when they're behind closed doors. The little thing they have going on only exists when they're hidden from prying eyes. It has been four—or five, she doesn't really know—months since she and Taehyung "got together", and even though she understands that a relationship is not what he wants and she's fine with that, she still hopes for something a little more from time to time. More in the sense that she can look at him and think that's my boyfriend or be able to hold his hand in public without worrying that she's taking things too far.

"Baby, wake up," he whispers with that morning voice of his, raspy and low and just enough to make her heart start skipping beats. Makes a mental note to remind him to stop with the pet names for the sake of her sanity. "We have to go that hospital remember? To ask about your mother?"

Not much has changed ever since Taehyung kissed her. Things managed to be awkward for a while, and it took him three whole days to bring the kiss up and tell her that he's not looking for anything serious at the moment, said that it's for the best and if she has a problem with that he suggested that she stayed away from him.

Don't want to hurt you, he had said.

But she had told Taehyung that she wasn't looking for anything serious either, just something that'll get Jeongguk off her mind. It was an unlike Seojung thing to do to throw herself into something so casual being the hopeless romantic she assumed herself to be, but it was Taehyung. What other reason did she need?

"How can I wake up when you yourself aren't even fully awake yet?" She turns around and snuggles into Taehyung's chest, lets herself pretend that every piece of him belongs to her and only her, that she and him don't end at just being friends who occasionally kiss and cuddle.

It's surprising that even after months, they hadn't escalated further than the occasionally heated make-out sessions. Never thought that someone like Taehyung who sought companionship just for pleasure be so hesitant when things went borderline from being more than just steamy. Seojung doesn't know if it's a good thing or a bad thing, but she chooses not to think about it too much. Kissing him still leaves her with a rush that's hard to get rid of, she can't imagine how she would feel if Taehyung took it further.

"We really need to get up," the boy says once again and actually moves this time. Seojung has grown accustomed to Taehyung's bed just as much as she's grown accustomed to falling asleep with his arms around her waist, so having to give up the two is not something she looks forward to on any day. The girl unwillingly drags herself to the kitchen to make coffee and toast as Taehyung washes up.

For the hundredth time, Seojung finds herself thinking about how domestic everything is. They had spent countless of nights together in bed for the sole purpose of just sleeping and cuddling. Here she is now making them breakfast yet again and if she's lucky, Taehyung will come into the kitchen any minute and give her a kiss on the cheek. Soft thoughts like those only render her blue. Knows that she should be happy, but the lack of meaning behind what she and Taehyung are doing ruins the whole picture.