Legitimate Rape| Grace Helbig

Chapter 4

I park up and leave everything in the car, my bag, my phone everything. Before I get out I grab my phone and send Mamrie and Hannah a text. "I'm sorry xx" Tears streamed down my face, causing my throat to become sore, mascara to run down my face and my eyes to be red and puffy.
I put my phone in the glove compartment then leave to head off somewhere. I exit the car then head up to the flight of stairs that would end up on the roof. I push open the door and completely blank everyone who was trying to stop me. After every door, I would block it behind me.

"No one! No one can help me now!" I sobbed as I got further and further up the stairs. I finally reach the door and go out onto the roof.

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry." I repeated as I walked up to the edge. I grab on and hold on a little longer. Just to say my goodbyes in my head.

"Madame. Madame, what are you doing? I'm going to call the police."

"Don't you dare call the police, I'll jump. Stay back, stay back. I'm warning you, I will jump. I will. Don't come any closer." I screamed as I moved closer to the edge.

"Ok, ok. I'll stay here. Now come back from the edge." She whispered.

"No. No, you don't get it. I don't want to be here anymore." I cried as I edged a little further.

"You do. Just think of all the people that would miss you. Family, friends."

"I'm just a nuisance to everyone. To Mamrie. To Hannah. To my mom and dad. I know that deep down they all hate me."

"Come on you know that isn't the case. Why else? Why else do you want to leave?"

"There's nothing else."

"There must be to make you go to this extreme."

"This man. My alleyway. He raped me. Every day I have to lie with this, knowing his DNA was inside me. Do you get now why I want to go? I can't live like this anymore." I explained as I let go off one side.

"My son."

"What?"

"My son. He did this, committed suicide. Hung himself in his own room and let me say that not being able to say goodbye to him sucks. Knowing I couldn't do everything I possibly could to help him. Knowing I failed him as a mother, as a friend. I went through so so much pain after. I caused my heart to literally break. Do you really want that for your friends and family? Do you really want that for Mamrie and Hannah? Cuz I know what it does to people and let me tell you it is not pretty. They will cry for days, weeks, months even. And when it comes to this time every year they will cry their arses off. So I'm not going to let you do this." The woman cried as she edged towards me bit by bit. A loud bang occurs and Mamrie and Hannah come bounding through the door. They rush towards me, trying not to make me take that step. I look down to the ground to see cameramen everywhere and police, ambulances and firemen everywhere.

"You called them, didn't you!" I screamed at the woman who was now behind Mamrie.

"I'm sorry love, you need help and that's what they are here for." She sobbed.

"Grace. Gracie. Come down, we need you."Hannah sobbed as they try to come closer towards me.

"You don't need me."

"Why? Why are you doing this Gracie?" Mamrie asked.

"It's because of him, isn't it. It's because of what that vile man isn't it."

"I hate him. I hate him. I feel like I'm never gonna be happy again. And every day it gets worse and worse. I can't deal with it anymore." I sobbed as I go to take a step. One foot was over the edge and it only took one to end it all. Darkness, that is what it will be. All I could hear was tears and gasps.

"I'm sorry." I sobbed as I lifted up the other foot and went to take a step. I take the step. I don't fall. More like fly. Mamrie and Hannah had grabbed my t-shirt and had pulled me off the side. I fall to the ground with Mamrie and Hannah surrounding me, in a tight hug. I never really like human contact but this just felt right.

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry." I cried as they continued to hug me.

"Don't you dare say you are sorry. I don't want to hear you say that ever again." Mamrie scowled as she kissed the top of my head.

"Come on, let's get you down from here." Hannah sighed as she broke the hug and stood up. Mamrie grabbed onto one of my arms while Hannah grabbed onto my other and they helped me stand up. We walk towards the woman who was trying to help me.

"I'm sorry. I really am and I'm sorry about your son. I bet he was wonderful."

"He was." She smiled.

"Here is a number to a speicalist." She whispered as she slipped Mamrie a business card. Mamrie nods her head in appreication then continues to take me down the stairs. We slowly make our way down the flight of stairs and head out the door. Luckily the cameramen weren't getting in my face and were not filming all together. They know when enough is enough. Mamrie and Hannah start to drive me towards my car but as soon as they are close to it they drive me off in a different direction towards the ambulance.

"No. No. No. They are going to think I'm crazy." I cried as I struggled and tried to escape.

"No Gracie. They are going to help you. They need to check you over make sure you didn't hurt yourself."

"It's going to be fine, I promise you. We are going to come with you ok."Hannah whispered into my ear.

"Don't leave me." I sobbed as I go into the ambulance.

"We are here Grace and no one is going to hurt you ever again. Promise." Mamrie said as she places a kiss on my forehead.