Thugs and Hood Love: COMPLETE (Editing)

Thugs and Hood Love 24 : The Final Chapter

Lyric POV

When Aria had come to tell us that word was that Billy was dead, my heart began to cry out in pain. Different sorts of questions flashed across my mind.

Was Billy really dead?

How could Billy be dead?

Who had killed Billy?

Now who would love me the same way that Billy did?

Who was going to help me raise me and Billy's baby?

Why does life hate me so fucking much to kill the one niggah that had truly loved me?

With the questions racing throughout my mind, my mind finally began to register that Billy, the love of my life, the reason why I had come to love my life, was now dead.

I couldn't help but fall to the floor and cry the rest of my life away. I mean, there wasn't a reason for me to live anymore. My love, my unborn child's father, my future husband, the life and president of the hood, was dead. So what was my reason to live anymore? The answer was simple and plain as day. Nothing.

"Aria, why are you lying," I asked with tear filled eyes.

In between her crying, Aria managed to choke out, "What are you talking about?"

Out of pure frustration, I quickly picked myself up from the floor and walked over to Aria's face. "Billy ain't dead. He can't be. He told me he loves me. He said he would be back to me tonight. He promised me that we'll be together forever and that he'll never leave me. He promised," I yelled over and over again.

Sometime in between my yelling, I had felt a pair of arms grip me by my forearms and turn me around. Subconsciously thinking, actually hoping, that it was Billy, my heart began to sober up. When I was turned completely around, disappointment , frustration, loneliness, and heartbreak were the only emotions that I could feel all at the same time.

"Calm down, Lyric," Brittany said as she pulled me into a warm, much needed hug. But the hugging only made it worse. From now on, Brittany was the closest living person that would remind me of Billy. But somewhere along that thought, it made the feeling worse. Why couldn't I be close to Brittany and Billy? Why did I have to lose Billy and continue to have Brittany in my life so that I could be reminded of what I lost and would no longer have?

But in 9 months, another person would be living that would be closer to Billy than Brittany. Our child.

"How, Brittany? How can..." sniff "I calm down when Billy might actually be dead? I fucking loved that niggah. I loved his arrogant, stubborn, crazy, sweet, loving, gentle, kind acting ass. I loved him with all my heart. Now who else can I love because Billy done took my can heart and left me to be alone with his child." I pointed to noticeable, protruding belly bump.

When I said the last part, realization stroke that I would be another statistic. I would be a single black mother was is left to raise a child on my own because my child's father had gotten killed by gun violence in the ghetto.

With every thought of Billy that went throughout my mind, my soul ached with so much pain. I felt mad because Billy had been taken away from me. I felt helpless because I wasn't there to have his back. I felt lonely because now I was alone. I felt heartbroken because my love had gotten killed. I felt empty, like I no longer had a purpose to live.

If it wasn't for the baby, Billy's baby, now growing inside of me, I think I could have actually taken a gun to my head and pulled the trigger.

BOOM!!! BOOM!!! BOOM!!!

Ignoring the knocking, actually beating, coming from the downstairs door, I continued to cry on Brittany's shoulders as if she could somehow take the pain and heartbreak that I was feeling away.