too late ; hemmings

#34

"Tessa?" I hear Luke's deep voice say into my phone.

"Hi Luke," I say quietly. Zoe sits across from me, staring at me with a worried expression.

"I... I just wanted to tell you I'm sorry for getting so angry before," he says, his voice shaky and timid.

"It's okay. I understand," I reply, my voice small like his.

"But I think that I need some space for a while. I need to just think things through. So maybe... we shouldn't... you know, talk for while," his tone goes down to a tiny mutter.

I can feel a lump in my throat forming and my eyes becoming watery.

"Yeah. Whatever. I think so too," I lie. I try to keep my voice sounding steady and not angry or upset, but it doesn't work as well as planned.

"Oh, okay. I have to go now Tess. I, um... Bye," he hangs up. I slam my phone down onto my desk and let my head fall into my hands and the tears start pouring from my eyes.

"Oh, Tess," Zoe pulls me in for a hug almost straight away.

"Zoe, I just need some time," I say between deep sobs.

"Okay. I'll be here if you need me," she smiles half heartedly. She kisses me lightly on the top of my head and quietly makes her way out of my room, shutting my door on her way out.

By now, my makeup had smudged all over my face and I was struggling to breath. I felt kind of empty. I had messed everything up. I no longer had two extremely important people in my life.

I'm not going to say I had no one left, but I now had lost some of the most important people to me. I lost Ashton and Luke and because of that, Calum and Michael probably don't want to talk to me. I lost all my old friends apart from Jess, because I had left them for the boys. A big part of me now felt missing. Those boys meant the world to me and now they're gone. I needed to call someone.

I picked up my phone and scrolled through my contacts to find who I was searching for.

"Hi Tess!" Jess's cheery voice rings through the phone.

"Jess, I really need to talk to you," I say, trying my hardest for my voice not to break down into tears.

"Are you okay? Do you want me to come over?" Her voice changes from a happy tone to concerned and worried.

"I don't know, Jess. And come over as soon as you can," I say.

"I'll be there soon, okay?" She says.

"Okay. Bye," I hang up.

--

"Tessa? Can I come in?" I hear Jess' voice coming from outside my bedroom for.

"Sure," I say. I had been sitting on my bed, with my legs crossed for the last 20 minutes waiting for Jess to arrive.

Jessica walks into my room and closes the door behind her.

"Hey," she smiles. Her smile looks apologetic, like she already knows that what I'm about to tell her is bad news.

"Hi," I smile half-heartedly.

"What happened?" She walks over to me and sits next to me on my bed.

"Luke doesn't want to talk to me and I don't think Ashton wants to talk to my either. I stuffed everything up Jess," I try my hardest to keep the tears from spilling from my eyes.

"Tessa, listen to me. You did nothing to stuff it up, okay? You didn't kiss Ashton; he kissed you. Luke is just angry and I know he'll come around soon enough," she comforts me, wrapping her arms around me.

"He told me he thinks it's better if we don't talk, Jess. He basically broke up with me," I say, my voice so quiet, it was barely audible.

"He'll get over it soon enough," Jess doesn't let go of me.

"And I've lost Ashton too. He was one of my closest friends and after he kissed me, I acted like a complete bitch," a single tear rolls down my cheeks.

"It's okay, Tess. It's okay," she reassures me.

"I don't know," I mumble.

"Hey, I have an idea. How about we watch a movie to get all this bullshit off your mind? How does the Breakfast Club sound?" She reaches for her bag and pulls out a DVD. Jess and I have always loved The Breakfast Club.

"You're the best, Jessica. What would I do without you?" I smile.

"I have no idea," she laughs.

--

"Jess?" I say. Jess had decided to stay the night and we had been in silence for a few minutes. I couldn't sleep because my mind was too awake.

"Yeah?" She replies.

"I don't know if I should forgive Ashton."

"What do you mean?" She asks.

"Well, he apologized so many times and I kept being so nasty to him. I feel bad. I lead him on, Jess. It wasn't Ashton's fault. It was mine," I blurt out. This had been on my mind for quite a while now and I wanted to tell someone about it.

"I'm not sure, Tessa. He did know you had Luke, but he still kissed you anyway. Maybe you should just call him or something," she suggested.

"No. I don't want to call," I say.

"Then how are you goi-"

"I'll go to his house in the morning."

-----------------

(A/N)

Sorry I haven't updated in ages. My writers block was awful

I love you all,

xxGab