Forget That Boy

I Can't Move On

I Can't Move On

     After days of working nonstop and trying to get sober, Sam was laying in his bed feeling sore and tired from rehearsals. Ashley was pushing him beyond his limit because of how far behind Sam had been because of the constant unconsciousness the alcohol caused.

     Sam found his promise hard to keep and snuck in a can of beer while he watched old videos of him and Jade on his phone, feeling disgusted with himself every time Jade said she loved him. Every time she smiled.

     He feels a hand on his shoulder and jumps, looking up to see Jordan frowning at him. Sam pauses the video and pulls his headphones off.

     "Are you trying to get kicked out of the group?"Jordan takes the can from Sam's hand and folds his arms. "You said you were going to stop."

     "I never said when." He mumbles.

     "Sam!"

     "I know! Sorry! It's just, this is hard Jordan!" Sam frowns. "All I can think about is Jade crying and telling me she hates me. That morning won't leave my mind, no matter how hard I try!"

     "Because all you do is surround yourself with memories of her." Jordan states. He walks over to the desk and lifts the plane tickets to Paris, he pulls a drawer open full of Jade's clothes that she left, and he grabs a picture frame that had a collage of them. "You need to get rid of all of these."

     "I can't." Sam says sadly. "I don't want to move on from her, Jordan. I don't want to put Jade in my past."

     "You have to, otherwise you're going to be depressed for the rest of your life." Jordan states. "I know this isn't going to be easy, but it needs to happen." Jordan sets Jade's things down and walks back over to the bed, looking down at the video paused on Jade. "You can start by deleting anything Jade-related on your phone."

     "No way!" Sam exclaims. "This is the only way I can hear Jade says she loves me."

     "Sam, that's what you need to move on from!" He shouts. "Look, mate, we're trying to help you. Nobody likes seeing you this upset, and I know you don't like being upset. I don't want to give you an ultimatum, but you either need to do this or I'm going to talk to Ashley."

     Sam sighs and looks down at his phone, feeling his heart ache more. He sadly lifts it to Jordan. "I can't do it."

     Jordan nods and takes Sam's phone, going through and deleting every video and picture that had Jade in it. "I'm sorry, Sam."

     Upset with Jordan's words, Sam shakes his head. "Don't apologize, it's not your fault. I should be the one apologizing. I've been blaming everyone, even Ashley and he said it was a bad idea from the start. The person who really deserves an apology is you." He says sadly. "You begged me not to let this affect you and Jesy, and it did. Jesy hates you because of something I did, I'm so sorry, Jordan."

     Jordan looks down sadly and sighs. "Can't change the past, Sam." He mumbles. "Start getting rid of Jade's things." He advises, standing up and leaving the room.

***

     After Christmas break, the girls of Little Mix were busy with preparing for the DNA Tour, and then they spent a while traveling the country. After the tour they went to America for a while then came back to do a few festivals. It's been months since they had some proper time off and the girls were all going home for a week.

     During the past months they had only slept in their flat for a few hours before immediately going back to work so they never had much time to sit back and relax.