Sincerely, Me {A Dear Evan Hansen FF}

{5}

"Connor! Evan! C'mon, dinners ready!" I heard my mom yell.

I sighed, wanting to pull the new cigarette pack out, that I got from my room. I wanted oh so bad to smoke, oh so fucking bad. But Evan.. he.. he told me it was bad. He said he didn't want me to die..

"Should we.. go down there?" I look at Evan and smile slightly at his still, nervousness.

"I would rather not eat with them... but... I mean.. if you want too..?" I start to mumble the last part.

"Yeah.. I guess I'd like to meet your parents." He says, shrugging a little then looks at me and quickly looks away.

"Ok. I won't mind it. I guess.. it's still going to be fucking annoying as hell." I mutter, looking at him.

"I don't mind.. I mean if you don't mind it either.. I uh don't want to force you to sit with your parents.. oh god I'm rambling again.." he rambles, then sighs at himself.

A grin tugs at my lips. I let it through, chuckling a little. "Your cute when you ramble."

I smirked as I saw his face instantly go red. "..u-uh ..um I .. uh .. oh.. my... g-god.."

I stand up, holding my hand out to him, "C'mon, we should get down there before she screams her head off calling us."

Face still red, Evan slowly looks at me and reaches his good arm out. I hold onto his arm and pull him up, surprised at how easy it was, as if he was way lighter than he actually looked.

He didn't say anything, just nodded and I started to walk back to the window sill, hand still firmly around his. Evan didn't say anything about it so I assumed he wasn't mad at me for holding his hand. I mean, he fell last time, I don't want that to happen again.

I reached the window and crawled through, letting go of his hand. Turning back to the window, I put my arm out again, to help him get down. He grabs it and hops down, smiling.

"Coming mom!" I called, looking back at Evan.

"Ready?" I ask, squeezing his hand slightly. He nodded quickly, face showing the last hints of blush.

I don't know what it is but.. I feel so much more happier when I'm with him. I feel like I need to be nice, as if he was a fragile vase I was carrying and if I slipped up and let my anger come through.. then the case would fall and shatter.. I won't let that happen. I feel as if I can be happy with him. I can talk with him about my problems, or even email.

I smiled to myself and walked out my door and down the stairs, Evan, right behind me. Still holding onto his hand I walked over and sat at the table, Evan taking the seat next to me.

"What's Evan doing here?" Zoe asked, fork pointing at Evan.

"I invited him." I say.

"Oh, what? To smoke weed with you?"

"Zoe! Be nice to your brother!" My mom snaps, glaring at my sister.

"Yeah okay, but we all know it's true." She mutters, poking at her food with her fork.

I roll my eyes at her and pick up my fork, looking at the food that was already set down. After poking the food with my fork I looked over at Evan. He was eating the steak, quickly. As if this was the best thing he's ever eaten.

"So, Evan, you and Connor go to school together?" My mom asked, looking at Evan.

"U-uh yeah."

"Ahh okay, so that's how you know each other." She smiled, taking a bite of her food.