Deviation Records | BTS Fanfiction

38 | Terrified

💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜

*SCREECHING* CIRJFIRJRJE
HAPPY BIRTHDAY JUNGKOOK
HAPPY JUNGKOOK DAY
*tears tears tears*
AND WE HIT 3K ON THIS SACRED DAY I FEEL SO BLESSED RN SHUT UP
💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜
LET'S CELEBRATE OUR GOLD
THE GOLDEN MAKNAE!!
Fr it doesn't even make sense to call him maknae anymore goddamit
💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜

○○○

"I wouldn't think of you as the ocean, no matter how much depth you show to resemble it.
I wouldn't think of you as the flowers, no matter how much beauty you show to resemble it.
All because one held so much chaos and agony beneath, and the other withered and died every day."

○○○

Yoonbi

Three people in this class look blank headed, that's the trick, Jimin, Jungkook and I look blank headed but no one knows just how much chaos there is under the surface.

Bells signaling the end of lunch break hit the walls of the class as soon as I am about to say something, anything to break the deadly pain and tension in the air as Jungkook and Jimin lock eyes. But this is school, it's a place to learn not sport drama.

What was I thinking asking Jungkook to tell me what happened here, and at the beginning of the day? Now I'm stuck with a storm inside me and watching Jimin's storm isn't helping.

During physics class, I look down at Jimin's fisted hands and ignore how cute they look because the atmosphere is too stuffy for this acknowledgment. He's nervous, he didn't show any anger but all the other worse stuff. Judgment was the boldest, disappointment and disbelief come right after.

He's disturbed, his thoughts are so loud I can't ignore them. I'm disturbed enough with myself but I can still hear him, his thoughts are so clear as they fill my head.

He's so confused, nonsense is running in his head as he shoots Jungkook looks that friends don't exchange. All through Jimin's phase, I'm thankful that Jungkook is only looking down at his desk. Like he knew the look Jimin would have on his face and the last thing he needs is seeing it come true.

It wasn't Jungkook's fault, I was confused at first, but this was a dangerous situation. It was a gang, criminals. Killing one guy is enough to prove they can finish off Jungkook if they knew he was there, it's not my Jungkook's fault.

Why does he blame himself, he was right. If he would've shown himself, he could've died too. I wish I was there to stop it all, to stop the living from dying and the fixed from breaking. It would've been all better with me there, a mutant there.

I would've protected my Kookie, he wouldn't be hurting so much. He doesn't need to, I take back calling him a coward. He is not. He's just human. He could've done nothing back then, it's all over anyway.

As I convince myself with Jungkook's innocence, the image of the criminals and the corpse replay over and over till it cuts through my thoughts and meets another vision so similar. The resemblance and the possibilities crowd my head, I lose to the pain caused by that and hiss to myself.