The Gates of Delirium

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His breathing is soft and calm...
His presence almost feels soothing, but yet I don't want him here.
He wants to be here.
He wants to help me...
I don't need his help.
He feels comfortable...
I feel unnerved.

"You know, Jon, there was no reason you had to run away, you could have done a simple eye roll and come and talked to me," my friend says calmly, "I'm always here for you, ya know."

I sit down on a large rock by the river, and he just comes closer. Dang, I guess I have to acknowledge him. "Why did you run after me?" I finally respond, not even looking him in the eye.

"I care about you Jon, very much. A lot of us do," he replies, coming around and then kneeling to look me in the eye, which I must respect his determination considering his great height, "Just let me in, and I'll help you."

I turn on my rock, so again he is to my back, I then, for some horrid reason I snap at my best friend: "CHRISTOPHER RUSSELL EDWARD SQUIRE!! LEAVE ME THE HELL ALONE!"

When I turn around again, Chris has stood up, hand over his mouth, trying to hold back some obviously painful emotions.

I just hurt him... I hurt Chris.

What kind of mean guy am I?

A part of me shatter inside as I simply pant out, "I-I'm so sorry, Chris. Please forgive me. I never wanted t-to be m-mean to you but-...I-I know you were just trying t-to h-h-help and I j-just-," oh, crap, here come the tears...

"Oh, Jon..." he whimpers, getting down to put his big arms around me in the most gentle of hugs. "You could never really be mean to anyone, everyone has their moments," Chris pulls away and then looks sweetly into my eyes, "Here, let's go. I promise I won't let them make fun of you anymore."

I rub my shirt sleeve along my eyes to quickly sop up the tears, and then get up and start heading back with Chris. "So, what were they doing when you started running after me?"

"Well," Chris begins, "Keith Richards started getting really rowdy with demanding the party, everyone agreed to head over to Bob's cabin, expect for Gina, who decided to stay with Ian in a vigil for Mick. On the way to the party, Rick Wakeman started showing the signs of being ridiculously drunk, and actually suggested a strip tease while in the middle of some sort of daze, which earned him a punch in the face from Keith Emerson. Let's just say Rick is probably currently babying a broken nose."

"You mean Rick, my dear Rick, is injured?" I ask.

Chris runs his fingers through his hair uncomfortably, and then replies, "I said probably. Considering I swear I saw blood, I'm nearly certain, though. It was after that brief incident I decided to run after you."

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