Denial // Ed Sheeran

Chapter 2

I heard a strange beeping noise. It sounded a lot like y alarm so I went to swipe it, only to have my hand come in contact with a metal pole. I became extremely confused and so forced my groggy eyes open. I saw a bright light and white everywhere. I shook my head, trying to get rid of the blurriness. Once it left, I noticed I was in a room with dead, withered flowers, deflated balloons, and a ton of cards. I was alone and scared. I started to unhook myself from the machines, until a soft voice came from my left, "You shouldn't do that. Not until it is ok'd from the doctor." I stared at her and said, "Who are you?" She smiled and walked over to me. "My name is nurse Joy. I came to check up on you. Do you know who you are?" I thought about it and realized that I didn't. I shook my head only to be in intense pain. Joy quickly gave me some pain killers and told me to rest. I gladly took that option and she notified my sister.

After a week, my sister came to pick me up. She was crying and took me home. I realized that something was wrong and I looked around at this place. I was told this was my home but I couldn't get any familiarity with it. I took in my surroundings and followed my sister who I could not remember but trusted into the house on the right. The one on the left was all burnt down. Half the farm was a waste land and I was told by my sister that there was a house fire, someone had locked all the doors and windows one evening when my family and Ed's family were having dinner together, I was confused as to who Ed was. and Amy my sister just smiled. She told me he was my boyfriend well ex now. She explained that he was now famous and lived back over in England. My whole family and his had died in the fire. 

I found out that Amy had taken over the farm and at the moment her son, daughter and husband were out camping. I then went to my room but nothing was recognizable. I only remembered my name and personality but even then that was only because of a diary I had found. I took in my appearance and realized I had so much potential. I decided that instead of being the old me, I was gonna be the new me but wilder, crazier and more out there. I read about mine and Ed's special place. I was determined to find it so after a week of learning about my family and old life and after visiting my family at the graveyard, I waited until it was dark before sneaking out.

I ran up the cliff face and started to climb down. I somehow knew where to jump. A feeling just came over me and I trusted it for some reason. I then found the entrance and walked in. The glow worms were bright and the lake was just as gorgeous. As I stood in the middle, I lifted my arms and spun before collapsing to the ground. A headache came over me and suddenly, flashes of memories swarmed my head but they were only of Ed and I in this place. I had no other memories. I remembered our song book we hid here of our duets. I remembered our bucket list and scrambled to find them in the slot of the wall. They were still there and I smiled.

I then grabbed the books and ran home. I lay in bed, my head buzzing the thoughts of having memories come back was amazing. I then wondered to myself. What sort of music did Ed do. So I grabbed my iphone 6s and youtubed him. I was amazed. Each song had a meaning and I knew I needed to see him. I then saw an ad pop up. He was touring New Zealand. I had the opportunity to see him. I then went online and ordered a front row ticket and backstage pass. The next morning I told my sister. She was shocked but then said, "You know Rachel, he has a girlfriend. He won't remember you. Remember it has been 4 years." I took a step back and yelled, "Well I do not care! I am going to see him even if it breaks me!" And then I stormed out furious. I then thought to myself, why am I acting like this. Is it maybe because there is truth in her words? I dropped to the floor and cried out. 

How could my life suddenly be in a turmoil. I hated life and the people in it. Suddenly my body started to shake. It shook so violently and I couldn't think, pain spread around it and my sister gasped. I blacked out as I saw her pick me up and tush to the car. I wake up to find that I had just had a seizure. I was shocked, well I tried to be until I realized suddenly my mind was blank. I could remember Ed and I, but there held no emotion. I was suddenly emotionless. This seizure took away all my emotions. After a week of being monitored and taking lots of medication, we found out that my emotions are gone and it could be a forever thing. I couldn't cry though and it hurt. They then admitted me to an institute in Wellington.

I was told I could wander and go anywhere just not leave the building. I was to be in my room by 9 o'clock at night. I had so many rules and I hated it. I was made to rebel. I knew it but because I was emotionless, nobody knew what went off in my head. I started to plot a way to get out. With every attempt, I failed. I then gave up and so after a year of sitting and doing nothing, well not nothing, I mean I would sing to the other patients and for some reason, we found that I could express emotions. Suddenly when I sung, I could cry, be happy, angry, any emotion. I was as excited as I could and so music became my savior. I then heard that Ed Sheeran was going to be performing and remembered his tour.

I knew I had to get out but large crowds scared me. I managed to persuade my nurse to come with me and to give me lots of stress free medicine and to monitor me while at the concert. I was surprised with my approach as all I did was straight up and ask and boom. I was allowed. I decided to choose an outfit as I had a week and man was I excited. I kept singing songs that showed that and my nurse helped me with a pair of yellow and black bumblebee striped tights with faded blue denim short shorts and a bright purple top that had silver writing saying, 'CRAZY CHIC". I looked crazy but that was my taste in clothing. Crazy and out there. The night finally came where I was for the first time in a year that I was going back out into public.

I then walked into the stadium of screaming girls and found my seat with my nurse. In my backpack, tucked away were the books. I was going to give them to Ed so he could remember me. I couldn't wait until after the show with my backstage pass. I then stood up as the girls around me screamed louder. I knew he was approaching and when I stood, I saw in plain sight him kiss another backstage before rushing out onto the stage carrying none other than Nigel. I smiled as I remembered me trying to play Nigel but not getting the hang of it so I just stuck to singing. When he came out I took in his appearance. He was no longer as chubby but had now defined his body but I could tell he still had a slight bit of tub. 

The annoying thing was when I had that seizure. I not only lost my emotions but I lost the emotions I held in my memories. What I remember of him were just memories, no emotions and that hurt me. Over the past year I forgot how to love because I was alone in the world. Yet for some reason when I stared at the guy in front of me, I felt it, a tinker of emotion, a tiny bit of love. The love I use to hod for him. All I could think about was so much for our always and forever. As I stared I suddenly noticed his eyes lock with mine. He looked a bit confused and then taken a back and then if it was possible became more paler, as though he saw a ghost. I watched as he shook his head, probably thinking that he was seeing things. 

For normal people, normal girls it may break them but to me I felt nothing, simply nothing.

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Hey guys, so the next chapter will be Ed's pov.

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