The Matchmaker

Chapter 17

That sudden realisation shocked Shannon. As she let herself think about it though she realised it made perfect sense. She was so convinced she didn’t share his feelings that she never let herself believe the truth. That urge to tell Brian she loved him when he visited was not just to make him stay. Rather, her subconscious mind knew how she really felt but she ignored it. Typical.

After all that had happened she was scared. She didn’t want it to look like she had made it up. As she thought about it though, it didn’t take long to realise that if she had been honest from the beginning it was likely Brian would still be with them.

She sighed mournfully and placed her head in her hands. It was all pointless anyway. Brian was gone and she would never see him again. It was likely she could track him down but she made a sudden decision not to. He had been hurt by her too many times and she didn’t want to do it again. If she let it go and tucked the feelings away in the back of her mind they could both just get on with their lives without each other. As much as it saddened her she knew it was the only way. Brian would find another girl, someone better than her, and she would be forgotten anyway. It was better off that way.

It would mean her nightmares would last forever but she could deal with that. Or at least she would try.

Remembering her guests she looked up at a sea of expectant faces.

“Are you okay, Shannon?” Nathan asked, his brow furrowed in concern.

“I’m fine why?”

Nathan stared at her for a long moment but seeing the pained look on her face told him to let it drop. He wasn’t about to embarrass her in front of everyone. He would talk to her on the quiet another time.

“Nothing.” Nathan said with a smile. “Well that was a killer dinner Shannon. I think we should go see what’s on at the cinema. You up for it?”

Amy and Justin nodded in agreement but Shannon froze. She had managed to pull off the dinner with no issues but the cinema was too close to home. She would be reminded of Brian and at that moment she didn’t need that. She needed to forget him.

“I don’t think I’ll come.” Shannon said at last.

She knew she should provide an excuse but she couldn’t think of anything. The way everyone looked at her though told her that they knew why.

Amy and Justin were the first to leave but Nathan decided to hang around. He sensed Shannon needed to talk so he wanted to give her the opportunity to do so.

Nathan followed her into the lounge room and sat opposite her. “What’s up Shannon?”

Shannon stared at him for a moment and wondered if she should tell him. Finally deciding to do so she opened her mouth to say something but rather than coming out with words she started crying. It came out of nowhere, she didn’t even know she wanted to cry but she couldn’t control them. Shaking her head in despair she picked up a tissue and wiped her eyes. Her emotions were all over the place.

“I’m sorry.” Shannon cried as fresh tears rolled down her cheeks. “This wasn’t supposed to happen. I had everything under control.”

Nathan sat next to her and placed an arm across her shoulders. “I’m here if you need to talk. I know I’m not a girl but I’m sure I can help.”

Shannon managed a wry smile. “If it was PMS related I’d be talking to Amy not you.”

“Well that’s a relief. It’s Brian isn’t it?”

As more tears ran down her cheeks she managed a shrug and a nod. Realising she couldn’t hide it anymore she just told him everything. He didn’t look shocked and that annoyed her. She didn’t like that he knew her better than she knew herself. Perhaps that would mean he knew what to do about it. She had no idea so she had to rely on him for support. When she asked him there was a long silence. She wasn’t sure if that meant he had the perfect suggestion or whether he really had no idea and was prolonging having to tell her the truth.