ғʀᴏᴍ ᴘᴏʀᴛʟᴀɴᴅ ᴛᴏ ʟ.ᴀ. » ᴅᴀɴɪᴇʟ sᴇᴀᴠᴇʏ

Chapter Thirty-Three

Monday, October 1, 2018

I'm nervous all day long, the kind of excited anxiousness that makes your stomach flip over itself when you think about what is to come.

Slowly but surely, time passes, and the very first show of my life approaches.

Meals and sound checks and lots of rest occupies most of the morning and afternoon, all preparing for the sold out performance later on in the night.

I spend a lot of time with Daniel and even more time in prayer, asking God to calm my nerves and use me to bring glory to him.

Finally, six-fifty p.m. arrives.

The show doesn't start for another ten minutes, but the sea of fans are already screaming and chanting with excitement.

I'm standing backstage in the dark, bouncing around on my feet, when the voice of someone I haven't seen in person since I left Portland speaks up from behind me.

"Hey, stranger."

I whirl around, eyes wide, to see my best friend.

I squeal as I crush her in a hug, screaming about how much I've missed her. She's laughing her head off as we sway back and forth violently, holding onto each other tightly.

"What are you doing here?!" I exclaim, the smile on my face stretching a mile wide in length.

"I flew out here this morning; I couldn't miss my girl's first performance!" she says brightly.

"Ugh!" I shout with pure glee, pulling her into another hug.

"I am so proud of how you handled the decision between this and Kither," she says. "You didn't try to take it into your own hands, you gave it to God, and look where you are now."

She yanks away from my arms suddenly to look at my face, eyes dancing.

"And you have a boyfriend!" she screeches.

I laugh, remembering how much she flipped out over the phone when I told her the news.

"I knew, I just knew, that God had something in store for you two."

All I manage to do is nod, my heart full.

"Well, I've got to get out in that crowd, but I'll see you afterwards, okay, superstar?" she says, backing away from me. We exchange smiles, and then she's gone.

I turn back to the stage and resume bouncing, the distraction of Blaire gone to take me away from my nerves.

Daniel appears by my side, reaching for my hand and looking into my eyes encouragingly.

"Don't be nervous, shorty," he says softly. "They already love you. And don't ever forget that I do too."

I look up at him and he lowers his head to mine, coming in contact with my lips.

I place my hand at the base of his neck, but eventually break away when I remember where we are.

He rests his forehead against mine, eyes closed, both of us breathing a little heavier than usual, though I can't tell if mine is caused by fear or excitement.

Before I know it, an announcer's voice is booming through the venue.

"Please welcome... Why Don't We and guest artist, Kai Merta!"

The roar that erupts from the crowd sends chills down my spine.

Then, the music begins.

The deafening beat of our single spreads throughout the entire building and I refrain from screaming along with the fans.

Jonah makes his way onto the stage, the boys following in suit behind him.

Daniel squeezes my hand one last time before leaving my side. I remain in the wing, waiting for my time to enter at the chorus.

Just as the boys start to sing the first verse, a million thoughts rush through my head.

In four months, I have grown to believe in myself, chased and achieved my dreams of becoming an author, let go of the mother who never loved me, declined the offer from the school that I no longer need to define the worth of my work, and fallen for the love of my life.

The chorus draws ever nearer.

The hairs along my arms stand up straight, my skin tingles, my breath leaves me, my heart slams against my chest, and my hands shake uncontrollably.

The chorus arrives.

I step onto the stage.

Just as the lights flood over me and I raise the mic to my mouth, my mind clears from chaos to peace and a beautiful thought surfaces.

Daniel, the boy from L.A., originally came from Portland. That was his home; it was where he grew up and where he lived with the family he loved. One day, he left to pursue his career, but in the future he returned.

He found me, a girl who had no confidence in herself. He found a girl who was broken and alone, but too afraid to show it. Despite all of that, he didn't give up on her. He didn't give up on me.

Two years ago, his talent pulled him away from Portland. This year, I was pulled away from the same place for the same reason.

Not knowing that the action would eventually lead us to each other and create an unbreakable bond of love between us in the future, we both moved to chase our dreams, from Portland to L.A.

the end
➵
I am filled with joy.
My heart is full.
The month that it has taken me to write this book has been such a beautiful journey.
I love each and every one of you; your support, motivation, and undying love wrote this, not me.
God is so, so good; never forget that.
Thank you.