Forbidden love

Jeffrey - Day 4

I was on my way home for the first time in two weeks, I've been hanging out with friends a lot lately. Why should I even be at home? Only to get yelled at for being the idiot I am? For all the bad things I've been doing? well... bad things according to society but it was our reality. In a place, you don't belong. How? I never belonged here, to begin with. Not at home or here in society. We're the ones who should be thrown away. We destroy everything and that's a fact, I'm not saying this to pity me, that's how everything is. I sometimes wish I was dead, why stay when no one else wants you here? Sure my friends might miss me but that's the rule of life. We're born to live, we're born to die, we're forced to swallow these pills and to never ask why. That's life. Our life. They call us a gang but we really aren't, we're just a bunch of friends roaming in the dark. The thugs are the one who approaches us and sometimes we fight but it's never our intention. We have to fight to survive in this cruel world. This world of endless darkness and no one gets it. They all think we're the bad ones, we're not. Even Nikolai won't get it even though he's supposed to be the closest to me, but no. He doesn't give a damn about it anymore.

I opened the door and made sure to make as little noise as possible, it was late after all and didn't want to wake them up not because I want to be nice - cuz I'm not a nice person even though some people think I'm soft - but because I'm definitely not ready to get yelled at and start a fight with one of my family members - if not all three of them -. The first thing I saw when I opened the door wasn't the hallway or shoes, it was Nikolai with a really angry expression on his face. "I'm fucked," I thought while looking at him trying to look as innocent as possible.

"Where the fuck have you been these past two weeks?!" He yelled at me.

"sssh..." I hissed.

"No! Where have you been!?"

"Outside"

"Two weeks Jeffrey!"

"Yes, Who are you to tell me what to do and what I'm not supposed to do?"

"Jeffrey!"

"What! I don't wanna be at home! Just let me be." I pushed him out of my way and walked towards my room as the bell rang.

"What now?" Nikolai gave me a suspicious look before walking towards the door.

"W-wait" I tried to stop him but he opened the door anyway.

A tall boy dressed in black stood there with a bandana covering half of his face and it made him look more suspicious and before I knew it I found the boy pushing Nikolai out of his way and walked towards me and pushed me into the wall. I tried to scream but he covered my mouth with his hand while his second hand was in his hoodie pocket. I looked at Nikolai and he just looked surprised and confused. Don't look at me. You don't have to see this. Look away. I tried to make him see these words in my eyes but it didn't work the way I wanted it to. If we were like ordinary twins then we would have that special bond twins tend to have. something went wrong in our case. I'm sorry Nikolai. These were the words I wish I could say to you. I closed my eyes to the feeling of something piercing my stomach. A knife. I felt the boy's grip loosen as he let go of me and ran away. My body weakened and I just fell together.

My eyes still closed.

Familiar arms hold me.

Something cold and wet dropped on my cheek. is it tears?

Who's crying?

A voice.

What is it saying?

"Jeff"

It's getting closer.

Jeff!"

It's getting Louder.

Louder.

"REY!" Nikolai?

"JEFF!" What is it?

Why are you calling me?

"JEFFREY! OPEN YOUR EYES!"

I opened my eyes and saw Nikolai crying while holding me in his arms. It has been a while since huh? Big brother.

"I'm so-"

"Don't say anything! Hold on." He cried. He did care about me after all. I get it. I get it now. I get the anger he felt.

I closed my eyes again.

His voice got farther away each second until it all became total silence. I fell into the dark silence yet again but this time I wished that I never asked for death.

I'm sorry big brother. I'll be the reason to your death. You'll never think about it but it'll happen.

I know that you won't ever do what I'm asking for right now but forgive me.

I'm sorry.

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School's back as you might've noticed that I'm not posting new chapters each week but I'll try my best to write as much as possible when I get the time. Being a highschooler sure is hard. But wish me luck and I hope that you've enjoyed this own character fanfic kinda thingy and stay tuned for more!