{COMPLETED} ✔️ The Girl He Left Behind

Eighteen

The day goes on pretty much the same. When I walk out of one classroom, the boys are there waiting to walk me to my next one. Numerous amounts of people come up and ask me if I'm OK and each time I say the exact same thing, so much so that I actually start to believe it.

I'm fine: one of the most used lies in history.

The same thing goes on at lunch time except it's slightly different because Ash apparently got a lunchtime detention which is unbelievably strange for him. I've only known him to the get detentions a few times over the years mainly because he's been stupid and got into a fight with his own brother. So as he's gone, Matt's the one in charge of looking after me. I could go and sit with all my friends and subject Matt into it listening to loads of boring girl talk but he's been there for me the last few days so I decide not to be that mean. We grab a few slices of pizza and a plate of fries and head over to a small table in the corner of the cafeteria. People still stare obviously and then there's the added factor that Matt hardly ever comes in here anyway, he's always outside hanging around the back of school with his mates, so the fact he's here makes all the girls in the room pay attention.

I slide into the seat closest to the wall and Matt takes the one beside me. I make a sharp intake of breath because I didnt realise we'd be in this close proximity to each other. I even blush every time his arm brushes against mine. All I can think about is when he kissed me and how much I want him to do it again. I know he won't though, he knows how much we'd be putting at stake. I suppose I've come to terms with I over the past few days but then again, everytime I see him all I can think about is his lips on mine and his hands on my body.

Sitting here and just casually talking is beyond weird for us. I can't even remember the last time we did this when it was just the two of us. It's annoying though because in the back of my head I know I don't just want to just be friends with him and I what makes it ten times more awkward is the fact I feel the same way about his brother. Well done Samii. Well done.

"Wouldn't you rather be with your friends?" I ask him, trying to stop thinking all those things I shouldn't. He shrugs. I don't know whether to take offence at that or not.

"Why did Ash get a detention?" I ask, finding it strange how I don't know the reason already.

He just shrugs yet again. I know he's lying. I know him too well not detect the slight bit of hesitation before he answered. I'm too exhausted from battling people's questions and stares all day to really care about why he's lying so I let it slide.

I nervously swing my feet back and forth under the table, scraping my shoes against the floor as I do so. It's my way of distracting myself from the long silence that's formed between us. I bite my lip. The silence isn't awkward but it's not entirely ok either. There's something between us and you can almost feel it in the air. All I want to do is just lean over and rest my head on his shoulder. I want him to wrap his arm around me and keep me close to him but I know he'll never do that so I don't do it. I just stay staring at all the people around us when really, all I wanna do is look at him. Cheesy, isn't it?

I pull my phone out of my blazer pocket. It's been pinging non-stop all day. I just want people to ignore what happened now and I don't want any more sympathy messages. I don't want anyone else telling me that it's ok because it's not ok and none of them understand except the boys. They know how to make me feel better, they already have.

Matt sighs, making me look over at him.

"What's up?" I ask.

He looks down at the table and turns towards me more, like he's trying to block everyone else's view of us.

"Sitting here is so annoying. I forgot what it's like to have everyone's eyes on you non-stop."

Finally, one of the boys actually seems to notice the stares they get for once.