1:25 am is when all the words come out. i wonder if you'll ever know. i think about the other's within this house right now that are crying silently or are fast asleep. i think about our neighbors across the world starting their day. i wonder why my veins are blue, but my blood is red. i wonder why certain things aren't dead. i wonder how my skin is still all together much. i wonder how we came together. i wonder how the once closest people are now the ones farthest apart. i think about how you'd look under that light at that angle. i think about how time works. i wonder if the whole word is wrong. i wonder if i'll ever end this bad habit. i think about when i was a little kid how i thought that if i ate a strawberry with the seeds a tree would start to grow inside me. i wonder when i stopped thinking about if my friends and i would reach the swings first at recess and not how masculine or feminine i feel today. i wonder how i read all these stories, but feel, inside, i haven't changed. i wonder when i started to think about cutting other things than paper. i wonder when i started to imagine your body against mine. i think about when i'll be able to see you next time. i wonder, i wonder, i think, i think how it's been only thirteen minutes past the previous time. i want to destroy these words and phrases. i wonder too fucking much.
A/N: I actually wrote this at 1:25 am last night.
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my personal essays
Non-Fictionyou may say you know me, but you really don't know me. ©writingxfreak
