my personal essays

entry nine

i now understand why kids always love receiving new toys. i now understand why i get a slight jolt of excitement when someone said they got me something. the mentality behind this feeling is all about time. it's a little inch into a distant future; you're jumping into a unexpected soon-to-be present. the excitement all comes from the adrenaline which pumps up because something is unknown, and when you finally see what you've gotten it'll be something that won't blend into your gray-scale life. you'll find something with a little more flavor. take a concert for example. my heart racing, screaming at the top of my lungs, maybe attempting to dance. this is what i'd imagined every time their songs played on my phone. i'm completely overwhelmed by this drastic change, from this dream into reality transition. you may look like an idiot to all the idiots around you, but you shouldn't give a fuck. all the moments leading up to this one you gave too many fucks. now it's time to live in this temporary. i know that now. these experiences have formed me into a new mind. these words have nurtured me into something i never could've imagined through these earbuds. i'm sure there'll be many more realizations, trips, falls, and fucks to come, but for now i'll just sit here and enjoy the ride.