Tides

night swimming

the minute we walk in the house, the smell of chicken hits my nose and makes my mouth water. i relaized i barley eaten anything all day, after i saw the mush that everyone ate for breakfeast. Sam didn't look nervous but more relaxed than in his own house or more doorway. we stand in silence for a few minutes. "um-do you want to sit?" i gestured towards the couch and he nods. he fallows me on the big plush couch. i fold my hands in my lap and stare at the celing. "you know the part of a date, is talking" Sam whispers, he inches closer to me and smiles. i raise both my eyebrows and try to act flirty "who said this was a date?" "you did when you asked me out" i knew the who said thing wouldnt last all night and wouldnt easily get old. "sorry im not good this" i say blowing out my bangs, Sam carefully brushes a strand out of my hair "don't worry, im easy just relax" if only it was that easy "remeber this is just getting to know each other, im just messing with you"  Sam leans back and gives me a smile, he puts a hand on my shoulder a light touch and starts to circle around it, as if wanting me to relax in his presents.   i was never able to relax much around guys, without golden liquor that Bree would usually shove down my throat, but Sam was the first guy who didnt look at me with a drunk brain and i guess Austin too, but he almost didn't count. i stare at the bracelet on my wrist, why am i still waring it? it felt werid to take it off , knowing that Maggie might find it. i take it off and stick it in my pocket with the picture, the sound of crinkling photos, sends the memory of that summer, and when Sam was blonde i look at him knowing what i want to ask him, but when i open my mouth to ask how his golen hair turned into a choclate brown like mine. Maggie's voice pipps up from the top of the stairs "Sam?"  Sam turns his head to Maggie who is waring shorts that shows more leg than pants and a tank top, her fadded purple hair is in a messy bun on the top of her head. she leans over the railing near the stairs, purposly pushing her boobs together. 

i hear a growl form in the back of my throat, i never was the jealous type, becase i never liked a guy as much as i did Sam and with Maggie flanting everything, it made me think she might not have a thing for Austin but maybe Sam or both. she almost skips down the stairs, and Sam watches her entier time. when they start to talk about how life is and everything i suddenly feel like a thrid wheel on this date, that isnt a date. Maggie and i make eye contact and with my face i try to tell her to stop, but she ignors it and only pushes her boobs closer together. when i stand up to walk into the kitchen, i feel eyes watch me as i walk away. i step into the doorway and am hit with the smell of food that is stronger in here, and a hum of music that can only be heard in here. April and John were dancing, when they saw me walk in, april held a wooden spoon with red sauce on it, her bracletts clank togther as she moved with the beat. the music was odd music that had to be from the 70's. when April relaizes im there she smiles "Rebecca!" and John's eyes meet mine "hello darling, who did you envite to dinner?" when i open my mouth to say Sam, he walks in threw the door way and April's smile grows wider "Samuel! darling, i havent seen you in so long" she walks over to him and kisses him lightly on the cheeks, leaving behind pink lip stains. John tuns down the music tell, you could no longer hear it. he gives Sam a firm hand shake. "good to see you, Samuel" "good to see you again sir" April holds her spoon with two ands and looks at us, like were her otp. "i was hoping you would reconnect again?" April said spinning on her toe and going back to the food. leaving me and Sam confused. i look towards John for an explanation but nothing came, "dinner will be ready soon"  when i turn to leave, Sam rest his hand on my lower back making me jump out of my skin with his touch "actually sir, i was wondering-" "you can call me John, Samuel" "my apology, John. i was wondering maybe when dinner is ready me and Becca, could take it to go" i almost smile at the fact that he still calls me Becca even thought everyone in this house insits on calling me REbecca, and only dose it happen that Sam gets called by Samuel, is that his real name? like is his hair naturally blond or did he dye it? the questions race threw my mind a mile a second, wanting to know everything about this boy i only remeber was a great swimmer. whenever i try to think of the past summer, what now comes up is my grandmother dying in her sleep back home, she was old but she would be the person who would pick me up from school everyday, tell me that everything happens for a reason, she would be the person i would run too when are parents would fight and it would take Jason the mile bike ride to come get me saying its over.