The Hijabi (Completed)

Running With A Reason

He told me that he loved me. It might have been true at the time, but now I couldn't trust anything he said. He told me that I was the only one, and that he wasn't gay. I always trusted him, and told him if he ever had anything he needed to tell me, he was more than welcome to. It's not like I forced him to be with me. 

He was the one, that night in the hospital room to ask to kiss me. I might have given consent, but I definitely did not give him consent after to cheat on me. I didn't give him consent to piss on our wedding vows, which meant the world to me but obviously nothing to him. I didn't give him consent to go to the mosque and tell them proudly that I was a "dirty no-good whore who had cheated on him." Consent didn't matter to him. It became obvious later, as he kept pushing, after I said stop. He became my father, and the man that I once was deeply and irrevocably love with faded away with each kiss. 

So, in the night, 13 years after I had stopped running. I decided it was necessary to start doing so. I did what my mother had so bravely done, many years before me, with a daughter by her side, the moon as her witness and a history of acceptance. In this moment, I had decided to change the course of my life. I went first to my mother, and she told me what she recommended doing. She knew the history of Zeke. She knew how the happy union had gone awry, and how the once glowing bride and turned into a skeleton of herself. She knew how I was going to go talk it out with our imaan. 

She knew however, since it was two in the morning and her daughter with her granddaughter by her side was asking for help that wouldn't happen. So, she silently let her in and engulfed her daughter in a hug. Something she wished he mother would have done with her. She heard her daughter call out her name in muffled hiccups that were covered by the tears streaming down her face 

"Ommi"

"Leni, I am here" She whispered. She knew that Allah's comfort mixed in with little bit of motherly advice so she started reciting 'Ayat-al kursi" 

Bismillaah ar-Rahman ar-Raheem
Allahu la illaha illa hu
Wal Hayyul Qayyum
La te huzuhu sinetun wala nawmun
Lahu ma fissemawati wa ma fil'ardi
Men thallathiy yeshfe'u indehu illa biznih
Ya'lemu ma beyne eydiyhim
wa ma halfehum
wa la yuhiytune
bishey'in min ilmihi
illa bima sha-a wasia kursiyyuhu semavati wal'ard
Wa la yeuduhu hifzuhuma wa hu wal aliy ul aziym

Saddaqallah hul Azim

She watched as her daughter heard the supplication, and took a deep breath. She sat in shock for a minute, and then started repeating it, until her breath ran out, and she then started wailing it. She repeated it until she had no tears to cry anymore. Her mother watched her find comfort in Allah (SWT)'s words. She watched her then walk to her daughter and give her the comfort she needed, she watched her daughter and granddaughter hold each other for dear life. That is when she decided that action was necessary, and that her daughter had a reason to run. However she didn't want her to be in any harm so she booked her the nearest ticket back home, and sent her to live with her great uncle, whom she knew would treat her with the respect she deserved. She also knew however that her granddaughter had never been there, so that when she decided she needed to go to. 

She told her daughter

"Leave with the moon to your right side, so hopefully Allah (SWT) will shine on you when you wake, as you deserve, and please  remember that He loves you more than anything, and that he is Bismillah Hir-Rahman Hir-Raheem. That should be enough information to keep you alive, as you know what that means. Please be safe, Leni and remember I will always love you. I will leave tomorrow morning, but please leave now, as I have booked the tickets for the plane and you don't want to be late for it. I will send you money so you will have enough to buy clothes, headscarves and other necessities. I love you. 

Author's note:

This is the start to my second book entitled "Running With A Reason" I will release it every Wednesday and Friday, In'Sha'Allah.