Lola Bradley - Sidemen FF

21.

It's been around a week since Josh dragged me to the hospital, the result of course being a badly broken foot. It wasn't the end of the world for me though, I've not had to leave my comfy bedroom the whole time and everyone has been super nice to me; well when I actually see them which is rare seeing as they have been busy recording. Although around 3am every morning I have always had a plate of dinner delivered to me, which is at least something. A light tap at the door broke me out of my thoughts as my croaky voice told them to come in. "Hey" Simon said softly, coming and taking a seat beside me, "I haven't seen you in three days which is funny because you're room is directly opposite mine" I joked, shutting my laptop and wiggling my aching body up the bed so I was now sitting up and facing him. "I'm sorry, recording has been crazy at the moment" he sighed, pouting lightly at me, "it's fine Si I was only joking" I replied, taking a second to take in his tired features as he sat awkwardly at the end of my bed. "We haven't really had a chance to talk about everything that happened in the restaurant. I'm so sorry Lola I was totally out of order telling you who you could talk to and then leaving you alone after we kissed" he apologised, nervously staring at the floor as he spoke. "It's not that deep Simon" I sighed, not in the mood to discuss our little argument, "Oh, ok" he stuttered, standing up and walking over to the door. "Simon come on stop being so weird around me. You didn't want to mess around with me and that's fine, I don't own you" I said as he reached for the door handle, stopping him in his tracks. "It's not that I don't want to, I do more than anything it's just.." he began before I cut him off sharply, "it's just I'm Josh's little sister. I get it Simon, we've had this conversation before" I groaned, watching his frown deepen as he stood speechlessly. "You're more than just his sister Lola" he sighed, finally finding the ability to speak again and leaving the room, softly closing the door behind him.

I was too tired to analyse what he had been saying, I couldn't let myself attach meaning to his empty words; that would only end in rejection and sadness. Instead I pushed my weak body off my bed and quickly grabbed my crutches, adjusting them under my arms and beginning to hop out my room for the first time this week, slowly but steadily going to JJs room which I was told I could go in and use the lift seeing as it went straight to the kitchen and he wasn't home this month. The doors pushed open as it let out a loud 'ping' noise and I quickly hobbled in, impatiently drumming my fingers on the handle of the crutches while I awaited to arrive downstairs. As I dragged myself out the lift a part of me hoped there would be someone down here to talk to, even if it was just Josh seeing as the lack of human interaction apart from a few 'hello's' and 'thank you's' every time dinner was brought to me was driving me insane. But as I expected it was abandoned as per usual. I opened the fridge and pulled out a pizza, pathetically struggling to balance it and my crutches as I tried to shut the doors. "Need some help with that?" A soft voice asked from behind me, making me jump lightly, "thank you" I mumbled as Josh revealed himself and directed me over to a chair, taking over the task of cooking the pizza seeing as I was too incompetent to do so. "I hate not being able to do something as simple as make myself food" I groaned as Josh quickly and efficiently shoved it into the oven and turned the heat up. "Please don't tell me you haven't eaten anything apart from the food we have brought to you once a day" Josh pleased, looking me straight in the eyes as I directed my vision nervously to my lap. "I can barely go to the bathroom on my own Josh, let alone come downstairs three times a day to prepare food" I mumbled, knowing that this would upset him, "Oh my fuck, Lola you should have said something! I feel awful" he moaned, resting his head in his hands in shame. "It's not your fault Josh, you have a life too" I replied, fidgeting with the string from my tracksuit bottoms, "yes a life that you are part of. I'll take more care of you from now on" he stated, frowning softly at me. "Maybe you could help Simon edit and record some videos again, I know before everything happened you seemed to enjoy that" he added, making me smile. Although me and Simon were barely on speaking terms right now, a hidden part of me begged me to let my wall down and allow my feelings for him to blossom, which of course I would never let happen but I could at least spend some more time with him to satisfy that part of me.