Night Drives

Chapter 20

Chapter 20:

I avoided the stop lights as much as I could to beat the traffic. There's movement. Those words repeated in my head. There's hope. There's hope. I handled the receptionist, grabbed the visitor's badge and jogged to his room. Pushing the door open, Aunt Karen whirled around, tears filled her eyes and dripped to her cheeks. "Damien." She gasped, her eyes watery, speeding her steps up to me with open arms. "Oh my God." The third

hug since I've been here. I embrace her gently. Her hair was down to her shoulders, wearing a cardigan.

"Can you believe it?" She asked in a hushed voice.

"I never stopped," I said, looking at the unmoving figure on the hospital bed. The heart monitor beeped. I watched over my aunt's shoulder for anything, if his ankle would jump. If his leg would jolt. We let go, she kept one of her arms on my stomach.

I'm keeping an eye on him when he does it again," she answered, her eyes red from crying. She didn't wipe the drops from her face. She sat, holding his hand. I didn't blame her, I'm doing the same. I wondered where her uncle was, I left it up to her if she wanted to say anything else. I sit, leaning on my knees. If I stare at him long enough, he'll probably open his eyes. I sniffed, come on. Move. I widened my eyes, jiggling my toes inside my shoes. My gaze went to her, holding her son's hand, nibbling on her index finger knuckle. I have the same anxious feeling she probably has. I feel like I want to throw up.

"Do you want anything from the cafeteria?" I stood.

"Coffee," she croaked. I got out of there with a quick stride, pressing the elevator. What if it was a reflex? Like those bodies that are... I can't even say it. I didn't want to think about it. At all. He has to wake up. I wasn't in the mood for anything. I'm not hungry. How did she take it again?

I could treat her for a snack. I don't know. I noticed Olivia in the waiting room. Olivia? I double take. It's her. She's wearing the same clothes. She's jiggling her leg, moving her head side to side. Her name was called up to the reception. She walked up, speaking to reception.

Her face fell to a disappointed expression to what the receptionist was saying and then she nodded. I see her muttering to herself, watching her walk out, dragging her feet and slumping her shoulders. Ok. I headed to the cafeteria, got two black coffees and sugar. When I entered the room, Aunt Karen was still staring at James. Her elbows were resting on her knees, nibbling on her nails. "I brought cream and sugar."

"Thanks." She took one of the styrofoam cups. I took a sip while keeping my eyes on him. I swallowed hard from the hot coffee. It burned my throat, so I let it.

"How's school?" she asked, blowing out the steam before taking a small swig.

"It's ok," I answered. The beeping continued like music. The rhythm was like a clock ticking. A bomb ticking. When will it end?

"Your mom told me you're on probation and you're in some group therapy."

I shrugged, "I have to show up. Part of my probation."

She nodded, "good. Better than jail. Or both of you here at the same time." She laughed, letting out a painful exhale. Yeah. Better than that. As much as it was, I should be the one on the bed. I'm suffering. Reliving the same nightmare every night.

"You look tired," she noticed. I peek at her. Her eyes were watery and doeful.

"Yeah," I muttered.

"Me too." I knew why she wasn't. The same reason I couldn't.

"How's Uncle Morris?" I peeked over her. She looked down, tapping her fingers against her cup.

"Stressed. He barely comes to visit with me. He can't stand the sight of seeing our son here. He works more and lets me come instead."

"Bills aren't gonna pay for themselves."

"No, but I don't want to worry about him either. Stress is a killer. We're old folks, sweetie."

I kept silent, sipping on the coffee, staring at my cousin.

"Your mom called me."

"About what?"

"To see how I am, we talked about you and your sister. I heard she's doing good."

"She is. She has a boyfriend." At least her nightmares stopped. So she told me.

"That's great. And you? Seeing anyone?"

"No."

"Huh." We fell in silence. The door opened, a nurse came in to check in on James. Her smile is soft, stepping in slowly to his bed and changing his sheets. When she finished, she left. And we're alone again.

Now we wait.