Misconceived

Chapter Two: "His Point of View"

Just another day, just another school year. Hopefully this year would offer something new. And it did.

Just over 4 months ago, I saw her for the first time. She looked out of place, I hadn't seen her around school before, maybe she was new. And I thought to myself: "I have to get to know her." So, in my boyish mind, I thought the only way to get her attention was, SMILE. A charming smile that would surely get her attention! I was wrong, very wrong in fact. She just gave me a look of confusion. But thankfully we shared that one class together, I could make amends for rather poor start.

She was difficult, she wouldn't even let me know her name without some convincing, and what a beautiful name it was- ATHENA. A name that just rolls off the tongue. She was quite shy too, which I wasn't accustomed to. It made the task at hand even more difficult than I had imagined. Getting her to trust me was challenging to say the least, but eventually she let her walls down and let me in.

Not only did she let me in, I let her in, which wasn't normally the case. But then again, she's not your average girl. She intrigued me from the very beginning and I still can't figure out what made her so different to the rest. I told her things about my past, like how many girls I had been with, she wasn't impressed by that. I told her that I had changed, and I did, that it was all a long time and she shouldn't worry about it. Everything was like a dream- until it wasn't.

My friends had enlightened me on a rumour that was going around, that she was secretly seeing another guy while we were growing closer. I couldn't believe it at first, she didn't seem like the type to do something like that. And then it just came over me and I believed every word. I felt betrayed, I thought she had deceived me into thinking she wasn't like other girls, but I couldn't tell her that, instead I avoided her at all costs.

I know it was cowardly-I know should have talked to her- but the reality is...I didn't. I guess I didn't want to be seen as weak. I saw how much it was hurting her, but I didn't have the courage to go up to her and say something. But she did.

She practically screamed in my face, I deserved it to be honest. Yet I still acted like an ass and played it "cool" in front of all my friends. I really wanted to make things right, so I told her meet that day after school. I ended up abandoning her once again. She didn't deserve that. I didn't deserve her, so I thought she would be better off without me.

It's funny how we say we've changed, when deep down we know we are not capable of change. But we say it to gain someone's s trust and disappoint them when we are unable to be this other person that we set out to be.

I didn't mean to disappoint her, I fell for her, hard. I wanted to be a better person for her, but I ruined that, when I believed a silly little rumour. To add to the disappointment column, I never pitched when I told her I would be there. She must despise me for making her look like a fool.

All I wanted was the perfect girl, and all she wanted was the perfect guy, I got her, she didn't get him.