I’m still alive but I’m barely breathing.. Just praying to a God that I believe in..
The night was cold and peaceful, Bea was already laying on her bed and was listening to the radio playing one of The Script’s most famous songs, Breakeven. It was one of those nights when she would badly miss a certain person. She would remember how they used to spend the whole day together, talking and doing fun and memorable things. And how she wished they could have them back, but she knew better than that.
cause I got time while she got freedom.. When a heart breaks, no it don’t break even..
The love of her life looked perfectly fine the last time she saw her. She looked like things were going her way and she was having the time of her life. Like she was not even experiencing a heart break. Like she didn’t break up with Bea not too long ago. It’s been months, but Beatriz kept following her to make sure she was safe. After she had chosen to cut their ties, this was all she can do for her, even from a distance.
But the beautiful sight of her was bittersweet for Beatriz. It pained her because she felt like she was the only one who loved and got hurt. She suddenly wondered if she was the only one suffering from the fall out, but she felt relieved at the same time to see that she was doing good and looking happy. After all, she’d always want the best for her even though she broke her heart into pieces.
Her best days will be some of my worst.. She finally met a man who’s gonna put her first..
She then realized how miserable she had become for the last two months. She lost focus on everything. Her life suddenly became a mess, and though her heart was already broken, the mere sight of her was just breaking it more. So she decided to leave and tried to start a new life without her. It was never easy. She was still on the process of moving on, though she knew she’d always love her like she loved nobody. It will never go away.
While I’m wide awake, she has no trouble sleeping..
She was about to sleep when she heard the doorbell rang. She opened up and was surprised to see her standing outside her pad. Her eyes were puffy, maybe from crying. She was so worried that the next thing she knew she had gently locked her in her arms, her head on her chest and her arms tightly wrapped around her waist.
“Jhoanna? Are you alright?” She asked. She didn’t answer, instead, she just hugged Beatriz tighter like she would never let go. “What happened? Tell me.”
She sobbed for a few more seconds then she looked up. Her eyes were sad and hurt. It hurt Beatriz more, seeing her unhappy just when she thought she was doing fine. Then she swore whoever caused that pain, he’s going to pay for it.
“I’ve been… missing you,” her voice was shaking. Beatriz was shocked, she didn’t see that coming. So she just stared at her, confusion drawn all over his face. “I’m sorry… I’m really sorry that I’ve hurt you.”
“Jho..”
“You thought I was doing fine. That I was happy. And that I’ve got everything I wanted. But things were not like that for me. They were far from that.” She said while her eyes were brimming with tears. “Because I lost you.. And I’ve been just miserable as you were.. Maybe even more.”
Beatriz was taken aback by her revelation. She didn’t know how to react or what to say. She just stood there, trying to process everything she had said when she spoke again.
“Bei.. Can you just take me back? Please?” She pleaded. Her eyes screamed hope and longing. And with no further asking and thinking, she did.
‘cause when a heart breaks, no it don’t break even..
Well, the truth was, sometimes two hearts do break even.
And when two people’s hearts were both suffering from the unbearable pain of the break up, why prolong the agony if you can still get each other back? Especially if you knew from the start that that person was the only one who makes you feel complete. And your heart, whole and beating.
What am I supposed to do when the best part of me was always you?
And then, you kiss and make up because that’s how things were supposed to happen.
And so, they did.
