And Then There Was You [h.s]

Chapter Seventeen: Part One

Oh God, I mentally screamed. Did he see us? The thrill of getting caught was always a secret turn on of mine, but not like this. Not with Harry, not getting caught by Matt. This was turning out to be the worst birthday ever. "What can I do for you?" Harry croaked, adjusting his necktie awkwardly. So much for subtlety, Styles.

Matt gazed at us both. His eyes bounced from me to Harry, to me to Harry, then to just me, just before he let an odd expression crossed his face. Oh God, the frat party. He was remembering, wasn't he? The way he forced himself onto me, the way Harry came to my rescue. Could he possibly remember all that? He was barely able to function that night, let alone gauge any unsober memories from many, many nights ago. "I uh..." Matt started, walking closer to Harry's desk. I shoved my hands into my big jacket pockets to hide how they were shaking. I hated to admit it, but I was scared.

"I'm transferring into this class," Matt said, causing me to wince. Harry's posture stiffened, an uneasy look crossing his face as he said, "Really? It's the middle of February. Maybe you'd like to reconsider-" "No, I can't. I already dropped intro to journalism, so this is pretty much the only other option," Matt cut Harry off, continuing on, "I already had a meeting with the dean about it. So I just wanted to come and introduce myself. I'm Matt Beckett," Matt extended his hand casually, smiling smugly as he waited for Harry to shake hands with him. Harry reached out slowly and unsurely, shaking Matt's hand. I felt like I was going to be sick.

Right on cue, Matt's gaze turned to me. He smiled his usual panty-dropping smile, except this time around it had zero affect on me. "Hey, Logan," he said, coming over to me. His hands barricaded me tightly and I gasped. My heart sped up and I held my breath, memories of the frat party began to play on a continuous loop. I knew Matt was sober now and only hugging me, but I felt as if I was on fire and I needed to immediately extinguish the flames. "Okay, that's enough," I said all in one breath, wriggling out of his grasp. Matt let go and exchanged a confused look. "I just wanted to wish you happy birthday," he said, trying to hide his confusion.

 I momentarily glanced at Harry, who was glaring down Matt. If looks could kill, well, let's just say I won't be showing up to Matt's funeral. "Thanks, Matt," I said. "You're in this class?" Matt asked, stepping closer to me and totally ignoring the fact that there was another person in the room. "Yeah, but now I'm considering a transfer," I told him, though he took it as a joke and laughed a hardy, oblivious laugh. As his laughter subdued, he said, "Don't even think about it, Sedona. I'm going to need all the help I can get in this class-" "I'm sorry but you should be going, I have another class I need to prepare for," a jealous Harry interjected. His cheeks were pink and his hands were balled up into fists, indicating to me that Matt was just about as good as dead if he didn't leave right now. There was no way for me to just usher out Matt, so I knew I'd have to leave, too, and the thought of leaving struck a painful  reaction in my heart. "Sorry, Professor Styles, we'll get going," I crowed, heading towards the door. As we walked, Matt asked, "So, why did I receive a 'sorry, you're uninvited' text from Kristen this morning about your birthday party?"

"Because I didn't want you to come, don't take it personally," I answered.

"How do you expect me to not take it personally?" Matt sighed. We walked outside, standing near the door of the classroom. I needed Harry close, just in case Matt decided to do something. Would Matt do something? I didn't want to think he would, but he seemed so different that night. I didn't want to place any trust in him just because he was once a good guy. His actions at the party were near unforgivable. 

"Look, Logan, I don't know what's going on with us. A month ago you were flirting with me and tried to get into my pants and now all of a sudden you're giving me the cold shoulder." His reiteration of what he said that night at the party gave me the notion that he, in fact, had no recollection of that night at all. "You know, before we dated we were actually really good friends," he told me, trying to lighten the mood. "So what, you want us to be friends?" I laughed pitifully. 

"We don't need to fucking hold hands and skip around campus but yeah, some common ground would be nice,"

"Matt," I started, "You're a nice guy, but-" "Don't give me that bullshit, Sedona," he cut me off. "I can tell you're trying to sugarcoat whatever you're about to say, which I know you never do. Just give it to me straight,"

"Fine," I swallowed my guilt, "I don't want to be friends with you, Matt." For the first time in a long time, I had finally been honest with him. I didn't want to be friends with him. I didn't want to be friends with him because I knew he had feelings for me. I didn't want to be friends with him because of what he tried to do to me at the party. But, most importantly, I didn't want to be friends with him because he only reminded me of what it felt like to be in a secure relationship, which was something I could never have with Harry, and it only angered me to remember. "I hope that statement comes with an explanation," he said softly, squaring his shoulders and running a nervous hand through his blonde hair. "I don't need to explain myself to you, Matt," I tried to draw him away with cruel words, but it wouldn't work. Matt was too nice of a guy to let me go, and I cared enough for him not to walk away. I didn't understand it, but although I usually fed off being a horrible person, treating Matt horribly wouldn't bring me any satisfaction. I cared for him, though I would admit that to no one.

"Logan, is it because of how we made out last month at my party? Did I do something wrong?" Yeah, you prick, my subconsious grounded out. You forced yourself on me and would've had your way with me if it weren't for Harry. Harry. I can only imagine how concerned he must be in the lecture hall, waiting for me to come back in and tell him I'm okay. I was reminded of the impossible possibility of Harry being able to  rush out of the classroom and stand by my side as I politely tell Matt to fuck off. But that could never happen, because Harry's my professor, and I his student. "No, well, yeah, kind of," I began, not sure where I'd be going with this. "Matt, we broke up months ago. And if you ever want a good chance of moving on then you need to give me some fucking space,"

"You make it sound like I'm the only one who needs moving on," he scoffed.

"That's because you are,"

"What's that supposed to mean?" he seemed confused, shocked even." We went out for almost a year, how can you just drop months of dating like we were nothing? Like I'm nothing,"

"I don't want to fucking talk about this," I murmured, shoving my hands into my ugly green jacket pockets. I didn't want to resurface feelings I had forced myself to forget. I didn't want to remember where there was once a time where I loved Matt. "No," Matt refused, "We're gonna talk about this whether you li-" "Logan!" A womanly voice interjected from down the hall. The clanking of heels hitting the floorboards and the scent of expensive perfume made it clear who was here, at the worst timing imaginable.

Josephine Fuller.

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I'm sorry I've been M.I.A for the past couple of weeks. School can be such a time-consuming bitch. I've also been having a significant amount of writer's block, and I'd rather deliver a 'good' chapter weeks after my supposed deadline than write a shitty chapter and publish it on time, yenno? 

See you next Friday!!!! Pls vote or comment if you want!! it rlly makes my day!!!