If I Were You [LalisaXTaehyung][COMPLETED]

Chapter 27 (The Memories of a Broken Fairy)

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Dear Rain,

So much happened this past few weeks, do you remember about the painting that I'm writing to you about?, it turned out to be a mess. How can I face him now?, how can I give it to him now? I failed again, well, we don't really have to guess, I'm a failure from the start, I'm a mistake.

I know I promised God to not cut myself again, that I will try and love myself again, but I just can't help it, it feels so good to slice my wrists and watch the blood kiss the floor. It feels so refreshing to take a bath and let the hot water slide trough it. It's stinging, but it reminds me that I'm still alive.
It reminds me that I'm no corpse with a beating heart.

If dying is the only way out, then why can't I just do it again? My overdose isn't enough, that means I need to do something more.

Hang myself?

Stab my heart?

Help!, I'm feeling my heart beating and I'm so scared!!!

The writings are faded, maybe she wrote it while crying, that small droplets of blood at the ends of the notebook means her cuts were still fresh back then.

Taehyung who is currently reading the first few pages is already crying with his heart shouting.

"AHHHHHH!!!" he shrieked in pain as he stood up then hugged himself for comfort.

The hyung line outside was startled that they barged inside of the room only to see Taehyung on the other corner of the room, hugging his knees as he sob.

"Taehyung, what happened?" Jin rushed to him checking every part of his body. Taehyung only sob in response.

"Taehyung" Jin cooed again, the three went to them to comfort Taehyung but he didn't talk.

"It's all my fault" Taehyung said in a whisper and Jin pulled him into a hug.

"what should I do?, it's all my fault, I let her die, I watched her die, I stood right behind her and watched!!" he said almost shouting with his cracked voice, Namjoon who can't handle the situation turned as he try not to cry. It reminded him of Lisa. If only he talked to the student, then maybe Lisa won't feel so lonely, then maybe Lisa will have a reason to live everyday, remind her about the beautiful things that life can offer.

But what kind of things that life can offer? What kind of beautiful things?

The forests that never had a chance to grew wider because people always burn them and cut them down to make high buildings.

The abandoned animals left on the abandoned shelters or zoos or even streets, crying and asking for help.

Baby animals who was taken from their family at the very young age to perform on a circus, aquarium or any other shits just to satisfy people.

How about the abandoned babies inside of the boxes, luggage or even laid naked inside of a bathroom, beside the garbage or even inside of a trash can. Or worse, inside of a locked door left only with a bottle of milk and darkness calling for her mama, mama, but no one heard her, no one opened the door.

Abandoned people walking, sitting, sleeping or maybe dead on the streets with no food, no shelter and even lack clothing or blankets for winter. Worse is people can't even give them a piece a fucking cookie or cent. They just walk on them, disgusted with the way they look, the way they smell, the way they beg for pity, for a single cent, a fucking piece of cookie, food to eat, water to drink, a comfortable clothing, a warm blanket, a warm heart, a sweet love.