Love/Hate

17

Henry's POV:

I watched her leave my car. I had never seen her this upset before. I understand that I was an ass for ignoring her but I was sincerely apologizing to her and she got even more upset. I was confused, did I make her cry? How? I don't think she was being dramatic like usual, not this time. She looked really hurt and I didn't know why. I felt terrible. She said it was her not me but I needed to find out what that meant. I sat in my car for a moment feeling like an asshole. I definitely deserved the asshole of the year award. I hurt her feelings three times within almost two months. Whether she's dramatic or not I still hurt her feelings. Why? Why did I? Why was I like that to her? Sure Meriah's is peppy, annoying and sometimes bitchy and dramatic but that's how she is on the outside. I had gotten to know who she really was on the inside. She's nice, helpful and sees people for who they really are. I had learned to like her seeing she not the person I thought she was. I never appreciated or cared for her looks either until now for some reason.

As I did all this thinking about her a weird feeling cane inside of me. "What the hell?" I said to myself still sitting in my car as I came to an odd surprising realization. I realized that I was starting to like Meriah. I was starting to like her more than a friend. What? That couldn't be. We couldn't stand each other for years. Maybe I was just feeling bad. The more I thought of her the more I felt that feeling of me liking her and that I cared for her.

I bolted out of my car searching for Meriah. I asked everyone around  even if they didn't know her, if they saw her.  I tried looking for Jessica or Ellen but there's no way I'd find them. I searched the hallways, the library in the school, I looked everywhere. I thought I'd look outside once more. I saw Jared and Mike by the locked bikes on the pavement in front.

"Guys, guys!" I said. "Listen I'm not fuckin' around right now, its important, have you guys seen Meriah?!"

"Nope but she was here this morning." Jared said.

"Where?!"

"Just in the halls man chill."

"Do you think she went home?!"

"Henry how the fuck would we know?"

"Mike I'm serious right now." I was starting to get irritated.

"Go find Alyssa, what do you need Meriah for?"

"You don't understand." I said quickly starting to walk away. "Actually I don't please explain." Mike said. I turned back around. "The hell do you mean?!"

"Dude you've been acting so different lately. Ever since you and Meriah have been 'friends' you've been acting even more different since you been with Alyssa." He said.

"I'm not with Alyssa we're just going out." I corrected. "Same thing, than why do you give a shit about Meriah?"

"Don't you hate her?" Jared said.
"That's what's weird," I admitted. I don't think that I do."

It felt so weird saying these things out loud but they were somehow true.

Jared and Mike were confused as hell. "So what are you saying?" I felt like they already knew what I was thinking. They're idiots but smart enough to put two and two together.

"You have feelings for Meriah?!"
"Shhh," I said. "can you not announce it to the whole planet?! That's why I need to find her and fix everything." Mike looked disgusted. "Are you out of your freaking mind?!" He said. "What do you mean?!" I started to get defensive. "You're just gonna find her and tell her this?! You have a thing that I set up... with one of the hottest girls in school, and you're wasting it on some annoying bitch like Meriah Stamperson?!" He said. He crossed way over the line I was mad now. "You know Mike you're actually a dickhead! I don't care how hot Alyssa is! You need to like a girl for their personality too, you don't even know Meriah, she has fucking feelings too and it's not like she doesn't have the looks, common we've all looked at her before."

Jared agreed on that.

"There's more to a girl than how hot they are! I've gotten to know Meriah and she's not the person you guys know her as. I just caught feelings for her okay? I didn't know how great she is."

"Fuck this I could have had Alyssa myself but I set her up with you to get away from Meriah!" Mike said.

That sounded so stupid especially said outloud.

"I don't care! You can have her I actually need to find Alyssa first and tell her I'm not interested anymore and you can have her! Meriah is a good person and she's pretty and if you can't see that then learn to have respect for a girl."

I shoved him by his shoulders then he shoved me back and Jared stepped in before things got worse. I left them both to go find Alyssa.

That weekend I told Alyssa that she was really great and that I had a good time with her but I explained and half lied that I was dating her for the wrong reasons because Mike forced me into it. I told her he was into her and she was pissed at me but then seemed okay after so we ended in good terms.

I sat in my room for a long time trying to call and text her. I tried all weekend but she didn't answer. It was killing me. I had to tell Meriah how I felt. Maybe, hopefully she felt the same way.