✓ | TEENS AND THINGS → richie tozier ²

nineteen

❛ i'm only a fool for you , and maybe you're too good for me ❜

-idfc, blackbear

"THIS IS all my fault."

"Stop saying that!" Richie said insistently, and Ash shook her head firmly.

"No. If I had just listened to you-"

"Then Spencer still would have found a way to get to you. And we both know it, gorgeous."

Ash's face went pink at the nickname she hadn't heard in a long, long time and she looked at him, biting her lip.

"I missed you, Rich. I missed you so fucking much." She said after a moment.

Richie was quiet for a couple of seconds, pacing his bike with Ash's, and then he answered, his voice cracking, "I missed you too."

She glanced at him sideways, and Richie continued, "After you left I. . .I didn't know what to do. It was like someone had torn a hole completely through me. I didn't eat, I didn't sleep- I just stayed in my bedroom. Then, Stan found me and I completely fell apart."

"Rich." Ash said softly, her eyes taking in his face, which was covered in dried blood. "Are you okay now?"

He nodded, taking a deep breath and letting it out. "Now that I have you back, yeah. But I can't lose you like that again."

"Yeah. I know." Ash said, and they rode in silence to her house, stopping just outside the door.

"I'll walk you up." Richie said, and together they got off their bikes, Richie slipping his hand gently into her's as he pulled her towards her front door.

"That reminds me," He said as they reached it, turning towards her. "How are your parents anyway?"

Ash hesitated, and then said, "My dad left a couple of days ago. He and my mom had this huge fight, and now he's gone."

Richie studied her. "And how do you feel about this?"

She shrugged. "I-I don't know. I'm relieved obviously, but doesn't that make me a bad person? Being relieved that my dad is gone?"

"No." Richie said. "I'd be relieved if my parents were gone."

Her forehead creased. "Where are your parents, Richie?"

He rubbed the sole of his sneaker against the concrete before saying, "Out of town."

Ash's face softened. "You can stay with me, Rich. You know that."

He nodded slowly, looking up at her and smiling. "Maybe I will."

"So, I'll. . ." Ash took her hand from his and opened the door slightly. "I'll see you tomorrow, okay?"

Richie leaned against the frame of her porch. "Yeah. See you tomorrow, beautiful."

Ash shot him a smile before turning the doorknob and entering her house, shutting it behind her.

Richie stared at it a moment longer before starting to walk down the stairs when he heard shouting coming from inside.

He stopped, and then turned and hurried back up the stairs, pausing to listen at the door.

"I won't go! You can't fucking make me!"

"Ashley-" Richie heard her mother say threateningly, but Ashley interrupted her. "I finally have my life back together, Mom! I'm with Richie, and it's-"

"I told you I didn't want you around him anymore!"

"Fuck you!" Ash screamed.

"Ashley Brenner! We are leaving right now, so get your things together. That is final, young lady, and I don't want to see you with that boy-"

There was the sound of pounding footsteps in the hallway and then the front door burst open, revealing Ash, who's face was streaked with tears.

"Beautiful?" Richie asked, taking her hands in his. "What's-"

"I'm leaving. Today. Right now." Ash said, more tears slipping from her eyes, and Richie stared at her, stunned.

"What? No- I mean- are you sure? Why?" He struggled to find the words, and she furiously wiped her face on her sleeve.

"Mom thinks it'll be- better- to leave. Get a fresh new start." She said, her voice trembling.

"But," Richie said, meeting her eyes and swallowing hard. "How am I going to see you?"

"I don't know." Ash choked, putting a hand to her mouth as a sob forced its way out. "I don't fucking know."

"No." Richie said, an icy feeling spreading down his entire body. "I just got you back- for the love of God, I just got you fucking back!"

She threw her arms around him and began to sob, her face pressed into his shirt and Richie held her to him, feeling his own tears start to trickle down his face.

Ash pulled away and he held her face tightly in his hands. "Look at me."

She did, pressing her lips tightly together, and he touched his forehead to hers, murmuring, "I love you more than life itself."

"I love you too." Ash whispered, and Richie said fiercely, "I'm going to wait for you, Ashley Brenner. As long as it takes."

Then, Richie leaned in and kissed her hard on the mouth, her lips melting onto his as his fingers braided themselves into her hair.

They broke apart, and Richie began to speak, his fingers still enveloping her face.

"I knew. From the first moment I laid eyes on you, I knew in an instant that I loved you. I don't know why, and I don't know how, but I did. This summer, I became completely obsessed with you. Every name I called you, everything I did- it was for you, and it was for only you."

He took a shaky breath, and when he spoke again his voice was thick. "With our fight. . .I fucked up. I know I did. And I'm going to keep fucking up. But I can't not have you. And if that means waiting for one, two, three years, I'm going to do it. Because I can't fucking live without you. I tried, and I can't."

His voice broke, and he gulped before continuing, "So, when you come back, I'm going to be here. Waiting. And if you ever need someone to come to, or-or someplace to go-"

"I'll come to you." Ash interrupted, and his gaze met hers.

She closed her eyes tightly before opening them again. "I'm going to come to you. Because- you- you're my home."

More tears streamed down his face as he gave her a shaky smile, and Ash pulled his face down to meet her's, kissing him again before letting him go.

"I love you, Richie Tozier." She said, and he nodded, the lump in his throat too big to answer.

And then, she was at the door, and she had turned, and she was looking, looking, looking at him.

Looking-

"Goodbye."

Looking-

The door opened, and then shut.

Gone.

And Richie Toizer, the boy who all in one had been a safe place, a crack in the sidewalk, and the part of something with two broken people who were each other's home, sank to his knees, and cried.

He cried for the people he had hurt, he cried for his youth, and most of all, he cried for his first love, his first heartbreak, and his

first,

almost,

happy ending.

t̶h̶e̶ ̶a̶s̶s̶h̶o̶l̶e̶ ̶d̶u̶o̶  .