Attack On Titan Imagines and Preferences

Shinee ( Kim Jonghyun )

Hey guys.
I know I haven't been around a lot and I'm sorry for that but I feel like this is a topic that I need to address urgently.

I don't know how many of you guys listen to Kpop or know about kpop but kpop for me was more than just cool videos, amazing vocals, great choreography. Kpop for me was amazing men and woman who trained since they were young to achieve their dream. The people that were apart of Kpop inspired me to continue my dream of being a dancer even though many people told me that I wouldn't make it far.

When I got into Kpop I was amazed by the people that I was seeing through my phone screen I felt like I could connect with people through Kpop and I would always be excited to come home from school and keep on watching more Kpop videos.

I got into shinee around 2014 and I can honestly say I was amazed. They were people that I would look up too and for some time they were all I had.

My attention shifted away from shinee around 2016 when I got into other groups and I started stanning various other SM artist.

When I woke up this morning and got on the bus to head to school I never imagined myself opening up tumblr and having an article displaying one of my fears. One of my idols, someone who I always looked up too during my younger years was found dead in his apartment.

He commited suicide, he was unhappy and I never even noticed... he was always smiling and making people around him laugh so it was hard for me to even think about him committing suicide.

I gave my condolences to his fans and to all the people suffering from his loss, yet still I hadn't accepted what happened.

All through my day that was all I could think about, then around my fifth period was when it finally hit me. My idol was gone, he was resting in heaven now and I came to the realization that I never got to meet him and thank him for the happy moments he and the rest of shinee gave me.

I was trying so hard to hold the tears in and I just felt this heavy weight on my heart, It finally dawned on me...My Jonghyun is gone, I won't ever get to see him in person, see his smile, hear his laughter, tell him thank you for the memories we made together as idol and fan.

I got home a couple minutes ago and I just felt the feelings rush to me, I broke down crying in front of my sister, something that I would never do. I was always the one that listened to my sister talk about her problems and let her vent to me so for me to break down crying was surprising to her.

I wrote this for all the Shawol's out there who need a shoulder to cry on, who want to talk about this or who just need the support of a fellow Shawol herself. Mental illness is a serious thing and because of that we lost an angel to it and we will keep on losing various other people to it if it's not discussed.

This chapter is dedicated to Shinee as a whole, you guys will forever be 5 in my heart and will forever be one of the groups that gave me so many memories. This chapter is dedicated to my followers and my readers who are suffering through a mental illness or anything at all, you are loved and you are important to this earth. God gave you a purpose in this earth and it would break my heart if I ever found out that one of you guys was lost due to you guys not talking about this to anyone. If anyone reading this is affected by Jonghyun's loss or just need someone to talk too don't hesitate to message me, I'm here for you and I will always be here.

This chapter is dedicated to Kim Jonghyun. Our beautiful angel who left us at the age of 27 the person who lifted shinee's as well as his fans spirit with all his jokes. To Kim Jonghyun, may you Rest In Peace and shine as brightly as the stars, you will forever be missed.

Till we meet again Kim Jonghyun, love from a fellow shawol to an angel in the sky. Rest In Peace baby you did an amazing job here on earth.