[Forever...] ~Servamp~ (sleepy ash) Kuro x Reader

Chapter 6

     (Y/n) yawned as her eyes opened slowly; she had decided to take a nap since she had nothing else to do. When the sleep finally faded from her vision she noticed a small black cat curled up beside her. 'They're home already..?' She thought to herself as she sat up.
     "Mahiru..?" She called, rubbing her eyes.
     The boy walked in the room, "oh, Hi (y/n)" he greeted.
     "Hey.." she replied. "How was school?"
     "It was fine, but I've got a lot of work to do before the festival" Mahiru said.
     "Oh right.. the festival." (Y/n) sighed, looking down to kuro. She shook her head and looked back up to the eve. "Hey if you want, I can help you some" she offered.
     The boy thought for a moment before smiling, "oh, thank you (y/n)! I'll start on my own but I'll be sure to tell you if I need anything!" He said, and began to walk back into his room.

     (Y/n) looked down to the cat beside her, did kuro forget that she wanted to talk thing through with him? Or was he just ignoring it. It was about time the girl tried to squeeze some information out of the lazy thing. He couldn't just expect her to go along with everything he said with no explanation, he should already know that.
     The girl sighed before poking kuro in the back to try and wake him up. He groaned and turned over to avoid her only getting poked again.
     "Wake up, we need to talk, remember?" The girl said.
     Kuro peeled an eye open to look at her before sitting up, brushing his fur back with his paw, and hopping off the couch in the direction of the bedroom. "Too much trouble..." he muttered quietly on the way.
     (Y/n) groaned and got off the couch to follow him. She soon found him laying in his human form on the bed.
     "Kuro, c'mon this is really important..." the girl sighed, sitting next to him. The vampire looked at her for a moment before turning to his other side.
     "No it isn't..." he mumbled and closed his eyes.
     "What do you mean it isn't? I need to know what your problem with me is. You can't just keep doing whatever and not explaining to me why." The girl argued. Why was he being so stubborn.
     Kuro sighed and bit his lip; he wasn't going to talk about this. He could already feel his suppressed memories infiltrating his mind.
     "Kuro..." the girl pleaded with no response once again. He was ignoring her.
     She spent a few minutes sitting in silence next to him before sighing. She slowly laid herself down where she was, her back facing the servamp. She didn't know what more to do with him, she was frustrated and confused.

Kuro glanced back at her quietly. He could tell she was getting upset, and it only reminded him more of what he was trying to ignore. He turned back and closed his eyes tightly, the crushing scene of (y/n)'s death flashing in his mind before he could stop it. The bullet that stuck her, was one from the assailant he was fighting. It was one he had avoided that struck her. He remembered seeing it only for a moment, and being distracted by something else before he could react. It was his fault.

"I just want to understand..." the girl mumbled, clearing the servamp's thoughts instantly. "I.. can't even remember what happened to me.. and you won't tell me anything..." she sighed.
Kuro turned over slightly to look at her with wide eyes. She.. couldn't remember? How could she not remember?
"I wake up.. and you're just gone.." she continued, her voice growing quiet and weaker. "And I don't know when or if you're coming back... and I can't look for you or do anything because I'm stuck inside-" her rushed words were cut off as she took a sharp breath and calmed. "And you finally.. come back... and you're just silent and I just- I can't-"
"(Y/n).." kuro mumbled, turning fully to her. She just shook her head silently with her back still turned.
"I-.." she breathed. She couldn't speak her mind with all the anxiety built up inside of her. There were so many blank places in her mind after she first awoke, and the hopelessness of the unknown ate away at her.
Kuro could feel the pain coming from the girl. He knew he couldn't keep these things from her any longer; no matter how hard it was for him to speak of these things, he'd have to eventually.

(Y/n) held her breath at the sudden feeling of arms wrapping around her. She closed her eyes and allowed herself to breathe waiting for anything from the servamp.

Kuro sighed as the emotions that had begun two years ago played back in his mind. Everything that had happened, it had left him frozen. That night, he barely had the strength to move. The shock and despair he had felt was too much for him, it was breaking him.
He remembered, not being able to eat, not being able to speak or to sleep for days afterwards. He'd see (y/n) asleep, her wounds still healing, and the whole thing would start over in his head again. Once the guilt and the despair was too much for him he had no choice but to leave for the sake of his sanity.

"I... couldn't stay with you, (y/n)..." kuro mumbled. "..and then.. I couldn't come back once I had left..."
     His arms tightened around the girl slowly. Every day, he wanted to come back. He had wanted desperately to be with the girl, to know she was okay, but he couldn't bring himself to face her after what he had done to her.
"...Why not?" She sighed, her voice was sad.
Kuro took a breath to maintain his calm and tired voice before answering. "I didn't know how to... after everything that had happened.." he mumbled, bringing his head to rest against the girl's shoulder.
     "What.. actually happen to me...?" (Y/n) asked quietly, trying to put all the pieces together.
     Kuro remained silent for a while before speaking. "...What do you remember..?" He mumbled.
     "C3.. they trapped us at night.." She replied, the whole thing was still a blur to her.
     Kuro sighed and thought for a long while, he didn't want to talk anymore but the girl deserved some explanation. "I couldn't protect you the way I should've..." he said quietly, nuzzling into the side of the girl's neck.

   (Y/n) paused for a moment to process it all. Things began to make a little more sense now that she had at least something to go off of. She could imagine after being attacked and not being able to protect the one you loved, that there would be some level or sorrow and guilt. What she had seen when they reunited seemed to match up with that. And if his feelings were strong enough —knowing him they probably were— it could drive him away from not only her but everyone. It seemed like (y/n) finally understood, but one thing still troubled her.
     "Why don't you let me outside anymore..?"she asked calmly after her thoughts passed. She had a few ideas but she wanted a specific reason, she wanted his reason.
     A minute passed and the girl had only gotten silence as a reply. She felt kuro's embrace around her slowly grow heavier as he sighed. (Y/n) furrowed her brows for a moment before realizing why he had suddenly grown quiet, he was asleep.
     She shifted slightly to see if she could come loose of his grasp, it was still early and she was nowhere near ready for bed. It soon became clear that she was stuck. The girl rolled her eyes at herself as she laid back down with the servamp, she huffed and prepared herself for the long hours that would come.

____________________________
It's 2am
I cried writing this??? Probably bc I'm emotionally trash
And also bc it's 2am
Okay bye