Weird Dear Evan Hansen One-Shots!

Babysitting (part 1)

Evan gets asked to babysit his cousin and Connor hates quality television shows!

Trigger Warnings
-Panic attacks
-Thought spirals
-Very small mention of homophobia (I don't think it would count but just incase)

Evan's POV
I woke up on Saturday morning to the buzzing of my phone on the night stand next to my bed.
I checked the time, "8:37" was in white font above the picture on my lock screen of me, Jared, and Connor at the orchard.

Finally I put in my password and unlocked my phone, finding a new text from my mom.

Mom: Hi honey are you free tonight? Aunt Hannah and Uncle Carl have to go to a baby shower and they need someone to look after Lily.

I thought it over before replying. I'm pretty good with little kids, and Lily's really sweet. But what if I do something wrong and make her cry? Or I accidentally brake one of her toys? What if she doesn't listen to me when I tell her to go to sleep? But then again I'll probably get paid $20 an hour, and mom can really use the money...

Evan:  yeah I'm free
Mom: Great Sweetie! I'll text Hannah!
Evan: what time should I get there?
Mom: she said around 6:00 would be good and that Lily is very excited to see you.
Mom: oh I have to run
Evan: Okay see you later then
Mom: I love you
Evan: I love you too...

I turned my phone off before being consumed by a wave of panic. What if Lily hurts herself? What if I hurt myself? What if I hurt Lily? What if-

My thoughts were cut off by the sound of my phone buzzing. It was a text from one of my boyfriends.

Connor: hey Jare! Hey Ev!
Evan: hey guys!

I typed back.

Jared: sup?
Connor: nothing much
Evan: umm...
Jared: what's on your mind Ev?
Connor: what's wrong
Evan: well...
Evan: I'm supposed to babysit for my six-year-old cousin tonight at 6 and I'm really nervous I don't really know why because she's really cute and everything but I just don't want to screw up and have them hate me and then abandon me and my mom and then my mom will hate me too
Connor: I need you to breathe in 4 out 4 for us. Why don't we just come with you to your cousin's house?
Evan: you guys would do that for me?
Jared: why not? All my hot girlfriends cancelled on me XD what else are we going to do??
Connor: girlfriends Jared? Shall we pretend that you could actually get a date? Let alone a girlfriend/boyfriend?
Jared: what are you considered then? My therapist??
Connor: right because I'm mentally/emotionally stable enough for that. Anyways I get volunteer hours to date you.
Evan: you sound like Alana. What about me? Do you not actually love me either?
Connor: I date you because my parents pay for my car insurance for it.
Jared: real original Connor.
Evan: isn't your dad a little homophobic?
Connor: that's pretty much the biggest understatement of the year
Jared: yeah Connor's homophobic dad forces him to date not one but two males
Connor: yup. Totally. So anyway Ev I'll get Jared at 5:30 and we'll be there to be there to pick you up by 5:40 and go to your cousin's house
Evan: thank you guys so much!! :)
Jared: of course Ev
Connor: see you guys later

I took a shower and got dressed in my usual blue, striped polo and jeans.

I didn't have any homework so I decided to binge watch "Gravity Falls" on shady internet websites until 3:00 when I just paced my kitchen instead because I couldn't concentrate on the show anymore.

***Time skip to 5:42***

"Ready Ev?" Jared asked as I climbed into the passenger seat of Connor's red pickup truck.

"Nope." I said honestly as I bucked my seatbelt.

"You'll do fine. We'll be there the whole time. We're your backup." Connor reasoned tracing squares on my leg.

"And if worst comes to worst I have my secret weapon." Jared said pulling out a DVD from inside his jacket. "Sponge Bob Squarepants. The entire first season."

Connor turned his head to glare at Jared. "That show is garbage."

"Sponge Bob was my childhood! I watched it all the time, still do."

"And look how you turned out."

"Your right, now I have a verbally abusive boyfriend."

"I'm just saying the show is inappropriate for a six-year-old!"

"Guys we won't have to worry about that if Connor doesn't keep both eyes on the road and both hands on the wheel!" I said gripping the dashboard like it was the only thing keeping me from flying out of the car.

***Time skip to 5:58***

I played with the hem of my shirt as the three of us stood on their front porch.

Connor reached out his long arm and rang the doorbell.

"Coming!" Somebody yelled from the inside of the house.

Within about a minute the door flew open. "Hi Evan! How are you dear?" My aunt asked but before I could answer I was already pulled into a hug.

"Um uh I'm good, great. I'm just- I mean how are you?" I replied once she pulled away and straightened her purple sweater. Unlike my mom's long blond hair, her sister Hannah had dirty blond hair that just barely made it to her shoulders, a little like Mrs. Murphy.

She looked past me to where Connor and Jared were standing. "And you two are...?"

"Connor and Jared." Connor said pointing to himself and then Jared.

"Evan's boyfriends." Jared finished sticking out his hand for her to shake.

"Oh how lovely it is to meet you boys!" She said, completely ignoring his hand and pulling him into a hug instead. She did the same to Connor. It's funny how much this remind me of the time I introduced them to my mom.

"Are you two staying? There's pizza on the way!"

"Yeah sure." Connor said as if the idea had never occurred to him before.

"We'll help Lily keep Evan under control." Jared said, grinning at the new shades of red my face had turned.

Hannah laughed. "Wonderful! Carl is waiting in the car. Lily! Come down, Cousin Evan is here!" She said yelling that last part at the ceiling.

"Coming!" Called back a higher, squeaky voice.

My cousin bounded down the stairs wearing a grey shirt with a unicorn on it and a pink skirt over matching unicorn leggings. Her long, dirty blond hair was neatly pulled back in two twin braids. "Evan!" She beamed and ran over to give me a hug.

She pulled away and ran over to Jared and Connor. "Who are you?" She asked bouncing up and down slightly.

"I'm Jared and this is Connor."

"We're Evan's boyfriends."

"Woah, you have two whole boyfriends?" She asked me and I nodded. "That's so cool! Do you think Evan is pretty?" She smiled at Connor.

"Evan is one of the two most beautiful people in my life."

"Your face is pink!" Lily giggled pointing at me.

I blushed even more.

"Alright well I have to go, the pizza is on it's way and already paid for. If you could put Lily to bed by 9:00 that would be great! We'll be back by 10:30ish. Lily listen to the boys please and do what they tell you. Bye!" She said running out the door. I locked it behind her.

Hope you liked it!!
Stay tuned for part two!