29: Tick Tock

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Two months passed quite fast which now is November 15th. 

I am feeling more weaker than ever, lying restless on my hospital bed. I stare at the big stone, perfectly wearing on my thin ring finger. I still can't get pass the fact that I am married or engaged at the age of 18.

Sitting beside me was only Andy, and I'm thankful for his presence even though I'm upset that he skipped his first few classes to visit me. School was shit anyways, his words not mine. The boys decided to go to school, only because I forced them to go, despite their loud whining that annoyed me last night.  

A few knocks are heard from the door. 

Andy and I looked at each other, and I nodded. He got up from his seat and made his way to the door which was locked, now unlocked. Coming into my room, was Tim. I furrowed my eye brows at his unreadable face expression. 

"What's wrong, Tim?" He sighed, leaving me to worry more. I carefully sat up and stare at him. "Tim, what's happening? Why aren't you saying anything?" I asked laced with concern. 

His eyes that looked else where, now focused on mine. "I just came back from the laboratory." I nodded, asking him to continue. He looked at Andy and then back to me. "He can stay." I said and he nodded. 

"Your cancer cells spread faster than I hoped it would. And now you're at your last stage." My eyes shifted to my hands which are playing with each other. "And then?" Emotionlessly, I looked back up to him. 

"You only have nearly one week left. So make full use of it starting from now, we don't know when it will happen. I'm so sorry, Jade.." Tim whispers sadly. Andy seemed to be in his own thoughts after what he said. I let his words process through my mind, until my glazed eyes look back at him. 

"Okay, thanks for letting me know, Tim." My voice cracked at the end. He gave me a sad smile but I didn't return it and looked away. And with that, I hear the foot steps getting more quieter and then the door closed. I touched Andy's arm and he flinched, his mind seemed to be back to the present. "I'm sorry.." My voice barely can be heard. He shook his head and wrap his arms around me as I leaned against his shoulder. 

I bit my lip so hard until I could taste the familiar copper taste in my mouth from letting my tears to be freed. But until Andy said those three words, I'm done. 

"Let it out." 

I started crying, full on crying as my wet tears started to leave wet spots on his grey shirt. Andy placed his hand on my back, patting it comfortably, trying to sooth me. But it's not working. I'm dying in one week or less. I'm not ready yet. 

I wanted to do so many things. I want to get married at the beach with my love. Go to a lot of places with my friends; road trips. I want to go to the animal adoption centre, to see puppies, thinking if I could adopt them for a while. But I can't possibly do all of that in a week's time. I need to plan all this out. 

I felt something wet landed on my shoulder, I parted myself from Andy, to find him failing to keep in his tears as he tried to blink them away. "I'm sorry, Andy.." I kept apologizing, he's like a younger brother- by 3 months that I never had. He made me laughed till I cried and having to clutch on my painful stomach. I have to admit, Andy actually made my life brighter, filled it with joy with his jokes and words. 

"I don't want to lose you.. Hell! I can't lose you!" He croaked out. "You're like family to me, including the boys. I will have no sister figure when you're gone!" Andy's voice cracked as he started to slightly raise his voice. 

His words sliced me like a knife, hurting me more. I sniffled and wiped my tears. I hold his face as I wipe the tears that's on his cheeks. Bloodshot red eyes and sniffles are never a sight that I want to see on Andy, he was always so bubbly and a joker. "Like what Tim said, we have to make full use of our time now okay? I don't care if I'm weak, I'll go wherever you want to today. Just you and me, brother and sister. Does that sound alright?" I softly ask. 

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