I fell for your smile (Complete)

Ch 36 : Couldn't even say bye

Adiraj sat in his room, his recovery was slow now, his sad mind didn't want to do anything, he just sat there reliving his old memories with his dad.

Digvijay was another painful reminder of what he had missed. His little baby boy had grown up and he didn't recognise his father. He remembered the way he used to fight with Kiran and Abhinav over Digvijay. He had wanted to give his baby boy the love of both father and mother but it seemed that it was destined otherwise.

He looked at the lines on his hands, his destiny he had been unable to change. He had been given a solid slap on face by God, the things his father had failed to make him understand, time had taught him in cruellest way.

His mother left him, this broke him but he had his father, he was always there for him, then he found Rahul, his best friend. Together they had done so many things that Abhinav used to joke that his hairs had turned white not because of age but because of Rahul and Adiraj. And Adiraj had been proud of it. He took Abhinav's love as his due.

When Kiran had come in his life, he had been so sure that she was just a passing cloud but slowly that cloud became his whole sky. She fell for him and fell so hard that she forgave him each and every sin he committed. She bowed down to his wishes going against the world for him. She was again a gift to him.

Then, he had been blessed with a baby boy. His world was what anyone would call perfection. Yet, still he hadn't been humble, he had been proud and arrogant, not recognising it as a blessing but as something which was natural.

He had lost his mom but he had found so many loving relationships.

But he had never been thankful to these new relations. He took and took from all of them, never appreciating their love enough and now, he had lost his dad forever. He had not been there for his last moments. He had not been there to say the final good bye. He had not been there to put his ashes into Ganges.

He cried for his lost father who will never come back, never admonish him nor tell him off for not letting Kiran do what she wished.

More tears fell down his eyes and among all this his mother still hadn't come. She still hadn't even bothered that her son was half dead. He hated himself for even remembering a person who had forgotten him completely.

He felt Kiran embrace him in her arms,'' stop Adiraj please, you are hurting yourself.''

He closed his eyes,'' Is this how you felt when your dad died? How could you even smile? I feel so guilty, so guilty. I was not there for him in his last moments, for his last rites. I am a terrible son.''

She sighed,'' He was so proud of you Adiraj, so proud, every day he just spoke about you. He had a big picture of you in his office, he didn't forget you for a moment. He used to tell me, my Adiraj will suddenly open his eyes one day like nothing happened. He was the only person who was optimist and only one who encouraged me. I miss him too. When he was there, I felt so safe, so secure, he shielded me and digvijay completely.''

There was a wistful tone in her voice. He looked at her suddenly and for the first time noticed something beside his grief.

Kiran continued,'' I was sad when my dad died but I had to deal with it. You will learn to deal with it too. No one can replace my dad or your dad but life will make its demands and you will move on.''

He moved her and engulfed her in his hug. He asked one question which he should have asked earlier,'' How long ago my dad died?''

She put her ear near his chest, so she could hear his heart beat,'' Three and half years ago.''

Adiraj swallowed,'' Who is the chairperson of Raizada group now?''

She closed her eyes but answered truthfully,'' I am.''

She waited for his response, he was totally silent and then he said,'' Good.''

She opened her eyes and looked up at him,'' You are not angry?''

He looked at her and said,'' How can I be angry when I know there was no other choice you could make.''

She confessed,'' I was so scared that you would be angry.''

He touched her face with his hands which were no longer skeletal,'' You don't have to worry Kiran. I have learnt my lesson. You are not like my mother.''

Kiran felt like a huge burden has been taken off her shoulders. She smiled brilliantly at him,'' Of course not Mr Raizada, I would be most distressed if I reminded you of your mother.''

His smiled slightly, still sad, he kissed her hand,'' There is no one like you, my love. No one. My Kiran''

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