Hiraeth Of The Heart (Tweek X Craig)

Chapter 10, Most Definitely Not

   The night prior, I had originally planned to wake up and heave out a breathe of relief at the realization that everything from that time was all just a bat-shit crazy dream.

I opened my eyes. 

It wasn't a dream, it was so very much real. I'm fact, I still felt all of it replaying over and over inside of my delusional head. Every moment over the weekend that I had been scared, embarrassed, frustrated; All those moments hit me once again like a hammer to a nail as if they had lingered around me until now- just waiting to torture me.  Waiting to mock me. 

The light leaked into my eyes, coming from my window that was very much inconveniently placed next to my bed. I brought my hand up to block out it's futile attempts to blind me.  Shifting my line of sight across my room, I was still adjusting my eyes to the dry air that circulated around my dull room.  Of course, I hadn't lifted myself from my resting position yet.  I didn't want to.  I was comfortably sunken into my bed as if it was quick-sand.  I took into notice that my underwear drawer was open.  Not again, Oh JEsuS. 

As I was viewing the crime scene, I grabbed Craig's arm gently in attempt to unwind it from its locked position around me. I raised my torso up, supporting myself with the palm of my hand against the quick-sand mattress.  Having a panic attack would just make me late for school, so I settled for intensely shaking and grinding my teeth together nervously, as if my life depended on it.  I shouldn't have expected otherwise from my well aquatinted enemy, the underpants gnomes.  Regardless, It's my fault for not keeping my guard up.  Of course that's difficult when all of my attention is focused on my main goal of not getting molested by the demon who was hogging my bed.  I whined softly as I heard a soft groan from my walls.  Whispers.  I remembered what I had been told by mom, by dad, by the therapist.  It wasn't real.  It wasn't real.  Prior to mumbling that to myself what seemed to be a couple hundred times, the groaning came to a yield.  I sighed in relief.

My moms soft voice from downstairs flowed through the halls, and traveled through the hollow walls to my room.  She's right on schedule.  Every morning, Mom made coffee for me before the oh-so dreaded school, and in the process, she sung multiple cliche romance songs as if she was having her own private show.  Dad and I never said anything about it.  Not a word.  He didn't have the heart to tell her she was an awful singer, and I didn't have the right.  After all, I'm sure I could do no better then my 'pitch-monster' of a mother.  The thought of it forced a crooked smile out of me. 

I really didn't smile often. Why? I don't know, I guess I just really never found a reason to. I'm not even sure what led me to smile just now. Regardless, It was directed towards no one in particular, or maybe it was to the 'monsters' in my walls. After all, they were all in my screwed up head anyways.  I'm sure Craig could chase them out.  He was scary enough to accomplish something so uncharitable. I'm sure they'd run out- tails tucked between their legs. 

Which reminded me completely of a corresponding topic. Craig.  I quickly faced over to my resting legs.  They were being trapped, Suffocated almost, by none other than Craig Tucker's black jean covered calves.  I shook in place, wanting to slip out of my skin and go somewhere else.  I wanted to be something else.  Maybe a snake.  Yeah, that would be extremely helpful right about now.  I threw a unnoticed look of uncomfortableness to Craig, but it was useless.  He was asleep.  I swallowed loudly and let my left eye jerk halfway shut, only to return to being widely opened just as the other one.  Twitching was about as normal as breathing for me at this point.

I gently attempted to untie my legs with Craig's.  Every time he moved, turned, or even hitched his breath, I'd drop my escape attempt in fear of being caught.  After about five minutes of shuffling into different positions, non being liable sources of unraveling my legs with Craig's, I noticed an uncomfortable feelings in my lower back.  Something pressing into it harshly.  I thought for a second at what it could be. Was it my phone?  I'm pretty sure I had left it in the bed. If so, I read somewhere that phones could cause cancerous cells and tumors if you have to much contact with them. It took a long time to happen, but the chance still suffocated me. 

Frustrated at the fact that what I thought might be my phone was digging into my back, probably burying cancer deep in my already flawed skin, I whipped my hand around behind me and felt around for it.  Bingo.  I grabbed onto it.  Big mistake.  The biggest mistake of all of the mistakes.  The GRAND mistake.  This was not my phone.  I positioned my neck to glance behind me.  Not only was it not my phone (aka. Apparent cancer spreader - based on google).  Oh no.  No, no, no.  It was so much worse then that.  After looking back, I noticed that Craig's eyes were wide open.  Reallllly wide open.  With a painfully slow look down, I noticed what I had attached my hand to was none other then Craig's. . . penis. . . that had made a unusually large tent in his pants.

"Tweek?"

His face remained wide-eyed as he didn't dare to move. I didn't dare to move either, more specificity, I didn't move my hand. Oh God, my hand. . . Move it. . . LET GO!

"OH JESUS CHRIST THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH-!"  I screamed, cutting a harsh line in the heavy air that had been quiet for an unusually long period of time.  I had not figuratively, but literally jumped out of my bed and made a mad-dash for the door, tossing the covers over Craig's head in the process.  I ran so fast that I nearly floated down the stairs.  Once I got past my living room and began slowing down, almost stumbling over my own feet upon reaching my kitchen, I welcomed a series of heavy breaths into my lungs.  I hated myself for things like this. 

Almost every teenage boy had 'morning wood' as they call it, so I guess I shouldn't have reacted in such a traumatic way.  I couldn't help it though!  It's Craig.  I've known him for such a short amount of time and I've already had so much happen that made me want to remain on edge 24/7.  Plus- it was. . . Against me.  I GRABBED IT.  What was I suppose to say?! 
'Oops, that's a penis. Haha, Sorry!'  I can't even mouth the words that pop up into my head, and even if I could, In that specific moment the only words dashing around in my head was, 'AH FUCK. FUCK. FUCK!'  I think running was probably a more efficient choice in the situation at hand.  In hand.  Penis in hand.  Oh JESUS, I GRABBED IT.

Upon seeing me, my mom implanted a confused face where her once smile was pridefully sitting.  Her deadly singing voice was no more.  I noticed this and stopped beating my head against the kitchen counter for a brief moment.  I didn't even notice I had started.  Good thing she was there.  If I had been left here alone to think about this, (aka. unconsciously trying to give myself brain damage.)  I'd probably be dead.  I hated thinking about dying. It's way too much pressure.  She brushed it off, not even asking a single question about my now red forehead.

"Tweek, honey, do you want your coffee?"  She asked replacing her furrowed brows with softly raised ones. A small smile tugged up at the corner of her lips and she used her pinky finger to gently sit a new coffee mug down.  (One that was not completely shattered and swept into the corner of my room.)  It was filled to the rim full of black smoking hot coffee.  My staple food.  Or rather- my staple drink.  I felt myself whimper as I lifted the burning coffee mug to my lips and gulped it all down.  A few seconds behind-hand, I felt drops spill from my lips before quickly dropping my now empty cup back down to the counter.  The hot coffee in my empty stomach made me want to jump out of my body and just float aimlessly around.  Not having to deal with anything or anyone, that sounds so pleasurable. . .  Of course, I was so jittery, it would be more of a vibrating soul then a floating one. I shook the thought out of my head, my blonde messy hair flinging every-which-way with my head.

She pulled her head back and furrowed her brows in a manner that just screamed, 'what the hell is up with you?'  She'd never say that verbally.  That's who she was.  She was the kind of person that would actually respond to those insanely annoying scam calls that tried to get your credit card number in an exchange for a 'free cruise to the Bahamas!'  She knew it was all bull; She just didn't want to 'hurt their feelings.'  Though I think in some ways, I've gained my timid behavior from my mother. 

I absolutely despise that motherly curse.

Because of her genes I was running out of my room screaming after grabbing another guy's penis.

Gah- Thanks, Mom.

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-(A//N: This chapter was kind of rushed. Sorry for the late update! I've had a lot of studying and tests for this week, but I'll update more now.)