Did You Miss Me?

The Past

"You have a step-brother?" David asks sounding as confused as they all look.

"Yeah. My mom got married. But I knew him before my mom and his dad got together. He was my best friend. We were more than friends even." I say looking up at Carter. His eyes avert from mine to stare at his hands. Then his eyes follow his hand as it moves to rest on top of mine for comfort, but his eyes stay there.

"Um, yeah. Ryan and I were close. Then my Mom met his Dad, and I think she fell in love with him. I think she fell in love with his money more, but it was pretty clear that she had feelings for him. At one point everything was good."

"And then things weren't good?" Adam asks.

"Shhh, Adam. Let her talk." David told Adam. Adam rolls his eyes but presses his lips together.

"Yeah, Adam. Things became not good."

"My mom wasn't working. She didn't need to with Steve, my step-dad. He had enough money to support us all. So, I mean mom always drank a lot. But a year after she got married it start to get out of hand. She was always drunk. I tried to help her, but she wouldn't let me. She was a bitch to me, abusive both verbally and physically." I stop, and bite my lip. "Uh...and then she just started different drugs. Basically became an addict. First, it was prescription drugs, then she started...", my mouth feels dry, "uh she started-she started to do cocaine for a while, but after she got extremely addicted to meth."

"We tried to help her but we couldn't, and Steve moved out. Ryan ended up being collateral damage. He fell in love-"

Carter cuts me off. "He fell in love with you?"

I shake my head. "No Carter. He fell in love with a girl he worked with. He was head over heels and she ended up breaking his heart. He went into a deep depression and joined my mom with her drug party."

"I quickly lost my best friend and my mom, and I had to see them everyday. Ryan lived with us...Steve didn't want anything to do with him after he found out about the drugs."

"Is that why you left?" Ian asks very softly.

"uh...kind of. " I want to cry.

"Without Steve, they didn't have a whole lot of money to buy their drugs. Ryan worked a full time job, but drugs...they um, are expensive."

"I was working at a restaurant, saving money to do something with my life. Maybe college, but really I just wanted to move out and live on my own. Get away from them."

"So they were asking me for money, but I refused to give them any. Until I couldn't...until...

**FLASHBACK**

I stood outside the door, staring at it. I didn't want to go inside. I could sneak into my room through the window but last time I tried that I almost broke an ankle.

I stand there, still staring.  I take hold of the knob and take a deep breath. I twist it but before I can push the door it is yanked open. Ryan stands there with bloodshot eyes, and a crazy expression. He grabs me by the wrist, yanking me inside. As soon as I pull away from him and try to go to a different corner of the room, but he doesn't let go of my wrist. He grabs me by the hair on the top of my head and pushes my head back so that it slams against the door. I scream as it makes a thump noise. He moves me slightly and pushes me. I fall backwards and on the ground. Attempting to stand, I grab the curtain to help me up. I end up dragging the thin red curtain down from it's position over the small square window, and onto the floor next to me. My lips tremble, and I want to cry. But I don't . Instead, I look up defiantly.

He grabs me by my hair, yanking me up to him. I grab his hands that are grasping my hair. "Stop! Stop it!" I scream.

I look over my mom. "Mo-" I get cut off when he backs me up pressing me to the wall, one hand covering my mouth, the other still holding me by my hair.

"Shhhh." He whispered in my ear. "Shhh."

"I've asked nicely Lily. We've asked nicely. Can you please...just help us out?" He whispered pleadingly.

He uncovered my mouth to let me talk. I spit in his face.

"FU-" I jump up to run anywhere away from him. I feel a his hands grab me, and I try to pull away, but he has me.

He takes hold of my hair again and pushes the back of my head against the wall again. I let out a scream, and fall to the floor after the impact. I feel my head pounding, and open my eyes to find my surroundings moving. I want to stand and try running again but I can't.

"Ryan she's too stubborn," I hear.

Ryan kneels down next to me. My vision is blurry and his face is moving even though its not. "Lilly I don't want it to be like this. Stop making me do this."

I put a hand to my forehead. My vision clears a little and I meet his bloodshot eyes. He looks crazy, and desperate.

I look at my mom, and she looks like she's dead. Her face is sunk in, and hollow. Her once beautiful curvy body is nothing but bones now. 

I look her straight in the eyes before saying, "There's money at the bottom of a black box in the back of my closet."

Ryan gets up and goes to my room. He points at me while looking at my mom. "Watch her," He says before walking out the room.

"You are a terrible mother." I say. I want to sound strong, but my voice cracks. I can't hide how hurt I feel.

"Your not a good daughter so...call it even." She says coldly.

I shake my head and I feel tears roll down my face. "Fuck you."

"Oh god. Don't be such a whiney bitch Lillian," She replies.

I hear noise of things being thrown around in my room. "Is it there?" She shouts.

Theres a pause. "Yeah I got it!" I see Ryan.

Ryan walks out the room with money in his hands. He looks and my mom and nods the front door. They both walk out not even bothering to further acknowledge me.

I sit and cry. I hope they're happy with that money. The only amount I have left is in my locker at school. I'm going to get it, and get the fuck out of here.

***

I swear I will finish this story