Chapter 8

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-Nivea's POV-

I wake up to my phone vibrating on the bedside table next to me. I look to see I have a text from Ana. I look around the room, it's dark very dark.

I then see that it's 7:30 at night. Damn I was tired and I still am. I could sleep all night but I still have to go home and talk to Derek.

I crawl out of the bed, then use the bathroom. When I walk out of the bathroom, I hear male and female voices, with music lightly playing, and the smell of food. My stomach growls and I realize I am super hungry so I make my way downstairs.

I step into the kitchen to see Ana, Skate, Derek, Sammy, Taylor, Lele, Madison, Jack, Felix, and some random redhead girl.

"Hey guys." I say hoarsely. They look at me. 

"There's my girl." Derek says smiling. I half smile. 

"You hungry sweetie?" Sammy asks.

"Yeah very actually." I chuckle.

"Well its your lucky day." He says grabbing plates out. 

Madison, Jack and Felix all wrap me into a group hug. 

"How are you Nivea? You like disappeared on us after leaving. We miss you." Felix says. I shrug. 

"Clearly life got in the way for all of us because you guys quit talking to me too, but I'm glad you're here. I missed you too. A lot really." 

"Yeah. So tell me how have you been?" 

"Busy, but good. You?"

"We're great." Madison says. I smile.

"Glad to hear it you guys." I say. 

I walk over to Ana and hug her. I then hug Skate.

"Hey lil ma how you feeling?" He asks.

"I'm okay big boy. You?" 

"I'm good. Just worried about you lil mama. You do know you still have me to talk to. I will help you through whatever." He says looking at me with concern written all over his face.

"I know Skate. You have always been there for me and I love you all for it." I say.

"Good." He says pulling me into another tight warm hug. He's acting weird. I sit down at the island with everyone else. We all socialize. Every time someone looks at me concern is always written across their face. Like guys what the fuck? I'm fine.

"I can't do this anymore. Nivea I know you've been cutting again. Sam saw the cuts on your thighs when you were changing this morning, and I fucking found your razors in the bathroom under your makeup bag when I was cleaning. Baby what's wrong? You promised me you would talk to us. So now you need to. Explain this." Derek says.

I sigh as tears threaten to spill. "Derek I knew about your little decision to begin talking to JJ and Lele. I know you reached out to them. I got so mad when I saw the messages. I was taking selfies on your phone and checking your email for you for tours and stuff like usual when Lele texted. I clicked on it and saw everything. Instead of confronting you I cut. I got so hurt about it because I remember the way we both were when I came home. We were so fucked after what they did to us and I somehow hated you for it. I hated you for reaching out to them first, because you lied to me. You never talked to me about it. I'm hurting okay and then Ana confirmed the whole thing. She told me everything, but Nivea's feelings didn't exist at that point did they? I guess I'm not ready to forgive them yet. JJ fucked me up okay. Especially, when he promised he wouldn't hurt me the way Colby did, yet he fucking did it. Do you remember when I came home? Do you remember when you had cuts lining your arms, chest, and hips? Do you remember when you fucking started doing drugs? Who was there for you when you lost all hope, who was there for you when you needed someone? Me. I was there. I was there through everything. Who was knocking on your door after you and Lele got in a fight? Me. Who's phone were you calling at 3 am when you needed someone to talk to because your thoughts were running wild? Just think about that for a second. You and Lele were a great couple but nature took it's course with that one, and it's about to do it again with this one, if you don't think long and hard. I have seen you at your lowest points, and your highest. I've been there through everything, and it really hurts when you just run off to your ex because you can't stop thinking about her. When you get crazy Latina Lele off the brain give me a call." I say tears falling so hard at this point I can't even see. 

Before I know it Sammy is wrapping me in a tight hug. "Vea calm down. Breathe." He says. 

I begin freaking out more. My body starts to shake and my chest starts to tighten. Sammy looks at me. "Vea look at me. Focus on my voice. Breathe sweetie breathe. Don't worry about anything else, just focus on me and my voice." He says. 

I look at him as he speaks to me. My chest lightens up as Sammy sings to me slowly. My breathing slowly gets back to normal. 

"Thank you Sammy." I say. 

"I got your back kid. You know this."  


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