Fixing a Hole (A Beatles Fanfic)

Mother

I ran back to John's home with Paul.

"Paul, what happened to her?" I asked, still panicking.

"She got ran over by a drunk police man" Paul softly said, as we made it to our street.

"Oh, Lord.." I whispered, feeling a lump in my throat. I feel for John.. I know what it's like. 

Paul and I slowly walked down the street. I stopped my tracks to the sounds of howls and sobbing.

My heart broke, "I hear John..." My voice cracked.

Paul just nodded at me, "I've never seen him so upset.."

And just a few weeks ago, I've never seen him so happy. 

I turned to Paul, "Paul, let me take care of this first. Alright?"

He nodded.

I took a deep breath and walked into John's home slowly. "Johnny?" I called out.

I heard no words, just sobs. The crying was so loud, it was heartbreaking. I've never heard a human cry so terribly.. 

I followed the sounds of his howling upstairs. He was in his room, holding Linda. Linda laid there beside John, comforting him. Just being a little doll for him to hold.

"John?" I asked, my eyes becoming glassy.

John slowly sat up, still holding Linda, and looked at me. His eyes were puffy and red like the day I was stabbed.

I rushed over to him, hugging John and Linda as I cried. 

John started sobbing even more, as for Linda? She sat there, stroking our backs and trying to comfort us.

"Linda, darling. Would you mind taking a toy downstairs and play for a while? I need to speak to Daddy alone" I told Linda softly.

Linda nodded, grabbing a bunny and walked downstairs.

"John.. I'm so sorry" I sobbed.

"It's not fair!" He yelled.

"She just got back to me, she-she was doing everything as a mum so well" He cried.

I stroked his back, "I know, love. I know."

He shook his head furiously and pushed me away, "NO! You don't know, Rita!" He shouted.

My eyes widened at him, "I don't know? John, I lost me mum at a young age! I know what it's like to a mother to be killed! Did you see her die? Because I saw me own mum die in front of me! I know it's hard, John. But that's why we're here. Mimi-"

"Mimi doesn't give a shit" He spat out.

I sighed, "Then Paul, George, Stuart, Peter, Linda and me" I held his hand.

"We are all here for you, Johnny. We aren't leaving, we'll be by your side through this." I said softly.

John fell into my arms, weeping again. "I loved her, Rita... She just got back!" He cried.

I started crying again, "I know, John.." I stroked his back.

"But she'll be with you for now on, watching you grow...She hasn't left you completely.." I said.

John didn't respond, he just sat there crying into my arms.

"Bloody policemen are supposed to help us, not get drunk and kill us.." He mumbled.

"I know, love.." I know.

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Julia's funeral took place two weeks after her death.

John could hardly contain his sadness, as he wept into my arms the whole time. Linda didn't go, nor did Aunt Mimi. I didn't want Linda to learn about death so soon, she's only so so young. No three-year old should go through this trauma as John and I did.

I saw John sitting down on the porch with his guitar. Mimi didn't like John playing his guitar in the house, so he played it outside.

Mother, you had me. I never had you.

I wanted you but you didn't want me.

So I got to tell you

Goodbye, Goodbye.

I started crying as I heard John's pain.

Father, you left me. But I never left you.

I needed you but you didn't need me.

So I just got to tell you

Goodbye, Goodbye.

Children, Don't do what I have done.

I couldn't walk, so I tried to run.

So I got to tell you...

Goodbye, Goodbye.

Mama, don't go.

Daddy, come home.

Mama, don't go.

Daddy, come home.

Mama, don't go.

Daddy, come home.

Mama, don't go!

Daddy, come home.

Mama, don't go!!

John started screaming out.

Daddy, come home!

Mama, don't go!

Daddy, come home.

Mama, don't go!!!

Daddy, come home.

Mama, don't go!!!

Daddy, come home!

Mama, don't go!!!!!

Daddy, come home!!

Mama, don't go!!!!!!

Daddy, come home!!

John ended the song in tears, I rushed over to him, hugging him.

"Mum taught me everything I know of music, Elvis, guitar, everything.." he sobbed.

I cried as well, hugging him. "She was a beautifully, talented woman, John.. She reminds me so much of you.." 

John turned to me and started sobbing in my chest.

He kept sobbing, "Why?"

I didn't know why. All I could do was hold him and cry with him. 

Seeing John in pain is the worst thing in the world to see.

Nothing can compare to it.